Tuesday - August 02, 2005

A Visit With Red Ted

About once a month I have to go see what Ted Rall (the Left’s poster-child for cartoon idiocy) is up to. Once a month is all I can stand. I usually get wound up real fast and start repeating ”The BatDude Challenge” ....

This man is an abomination before America. All I ask is fifteen minutes alone with him in a 12 x 12 wrestling ring, with chain link all around to keep us both inside. Broadcast it live on WWE. Sell tickets! Make millions! See Ted die a horrible death! It’s THE BATDUDE vs. THE JERKOFF! Someobdy call Vince McMahon and have him send me the contract. I’m game if Red Ted is. Let’s get it on, putz boy!! Wait ‘til you feel the grip of the VAMPYRE BAT DEATH CLUTCH! You’re going down, RED TED! Bring your cankered ass into the ring ....

Posted by The Skipper     on 08/02/2005 at 09:53 AM   
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   Friday - July 29, 2005

Weekly Moonbat Top-Ten List

This week’s Top-Ten List concerns one of our favorite criminals .. O.J. Simpson. The dude just never learns. In case you haven’t been keeping up with current events, O.J. was caught with electronic equipment in his home that allowed him to tap into Direct TV’s satellite signals and get free premium movies, etc. He was found guilty and ordered to pay a $25,000 fine. Of course, his mouthpiece said he was innocent, “IF THE REMOTE DON’T FIT YOU MUST ACQUIT!” - The judge disagreed ....

(CHICAGO TRIBUNE - July 27, 2005)—DirecTV said “the evidence was overwhelming” against O.J. Simpson. But the ex-football star’s lawyer said he did nothing wrong. The satellite TV giant on Tuesday was referring to its civil court victory in which a Florida judge ordered Simpson to pay $25,000 for allegedly stealing its signals. The case stems from the recovery in 2001 of two “bootloaders” in Simpson’s home that allowed viewers to tap into DirecTV signals without paying for them.

Simpson’s lawyer, Yale Galanter, said his client would appeal the judge’s ruling. “There is no evidence that he knew or should have known” that the devices in his home were illegal, he said.  According to news reports in 2001, federal agents were at Simpson’s home on a six-hour raid related to an investigation of an Ecstasy drug ring, money laundering and the counterfeiting of satellite equipment. Simpson was not arrested.

And now for this week’s Top Ten List:

Top Ten O.J. Simpson Excuses For Stealing Direct TV

10. For some reason, cable guy is afraid to come to the house

9. Spends a lot of time watching television now that it’s too hot to go out and kill people

8. Wanted to see where he ranked on Court TV’s 100 Creepiest Acquitted Murderers

7. Figured “real killers” might show up on one of them great premium movie channels

6. It was a rare lapse in judgement

5. Believe it or not, he’s had a bit of trouble landing a job

4. “Hey, any publicity is good publicity, am I right?”

3. Cable’s been out since he stabbed his television

2. Since when is stealing against the law?!

1. It’s not like he killed anyone

Posted by The Skipper     on 07/29/2005 at 12:45 PM   
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   Thursday - July 28, 2005

Most Ridiculous Item Of The Day

And here I thought ignorant, anti-war protestors were mostly young smelly hippies from Berkeley. Evidently, I was wrong. It appears insanity reaches out to all ages in this day and age. Now we have the ”Raging Grannies” attempting to enlist in the armed forces and possibly going to jail when they were refused ....

LOS ANGELES (AFP) - Five greying anti-war activists from a group dubbed the “Raging Grannies” face possible jail time after demanding to be enlisted in the US Army to fight in Iraq, one of them said. The women, aged between 57 and 92, were charged with criminal trespass after turning up at an Armed Forces Recruiting Center in the western US state of Arizona demanding they be allowed to join the fighting ranks.

“We’re very serious about that, we really want to enlist,” 74-year-old “Raging Granny” Betty Schroeder told AFP. “We think it would be better if old people were killed at war than young ones,” the retired nurse, whose husband and two brothers were killed in battle in other wars, explained.

Eight “grannies,” including Schroeder, are accused of invading military territory by entering a military recruiting office in the city of Tucson on July 13 to sign up. Military officials asked them to leave and called police who issued charges against five of the grannies after they had left the office. They are charged with trespassing, which could see them jailed for up to five months.

The five appeared in court in Tucson on Monday where they pleaded not guilty to the offence and the judge scheduled a preliminary hearing for August 19, according to Schroeder. “Criminal trespass is a misdemeanour,” she said. “I think we might be sentenced to five months in prison or a 500 dollar fine,” she told AFP by telephone from Tucson.

The “Ranging Grannies,” formed by members of the Tucson branch of the Womens International League for Peace and Freedom, meet every Wednesday and sing songs set to familiar tunes that protest the US military presence in Iraq and Afghanistan. The maximum age for enlistment in the US Army is 34, while reservists can join up until the age of 39.

Posted by The Skipper     on 07/28/2005 at 10:48 AM   
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   Monday - July 25, 2005

Mad As Hell

This is it! I’ve had it with this beeyatch. Once was enough but not again. NO, DAMMIT! I mean it! Jane Fonda is starting a cross-country tour on a frikkin’ bus that runs on vegetable oil to protest the Iraq war. NO! DAMMIT! Please, Dear God! Stop this madwoman!

(MYWAY NEWS)—SANTA FE, N.M. (AP) - Actress and activist Jane Fonda says she intends to take a cross-country bus tour to call for an end to U.S. military operations in Iraq.

“I can’t go into any detail except to say that it’s going to be pretty exciting,” she said. Fonda said her anti-war tour in March will use a bus that runs on “vegetable oil.” She will be joined by families of Iraq war veterans and her daughter.

They plan to return to the Santa Fe area, where she was promoting her book, “My Life So Far” on Saturday. Prompted by a question from the audience, Fonda said war veterans that she has met on a nationwide book tour have encouraged her to break her silence on the Iraq war.

“I’ve decided I’m coming out,” she said. Hundreds of people in the audience cheered loudly when Fonda announced her intentions to join the anti-Iraq war movement. “I have not taken a stand on any war since Vietnam,” she said. “I carry a lot of baggage from that.”

Fonda incited controversy in July 1972 when she was photographed sitting on a North Vietnamese anti-aircraft gun while on a tour of the country to drum up support to end the war.

Posted by The Skipper     on 07/25/2005 at 02:50 PM   
Filed Under: • Celebrities • Democrats-Liberals-Moonbat Leftists • Hollywood • Insanity • Outrageous • Stoopid-People •  
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Spam This!

Ahhh, good news at last. Russia shows us how to take care of internet terrorists .... spammers, that is. GO, RUSSKIS!

(MOSNEWS)—Vardan Kushnir, notorious for sending spam to each and every citizen of Russia who appeared to have an e-mail, was found dead in his Moscow apartment on Sunday, Interfax reported Monday. He died after suffering repeated blows to the head.

Kushnir, 35, headed the English learning centers the Center for American English, the New York English Centre and the Centre for Spoken English, all known to have aggressive Internet advertising policies in which millions of e-mails were sent every day.

In the past angry Internet users have targeted the American English centre by publishing the Center’s telephone numbers anywhere on the Web to provoke telephone calls. The Center’s telephone was advertised as a contact number for cheap sex services, or bargain real estate sales.

Another attack involved hundreds of people making phone calls to the American English Center and sending it numerous e-mails back, but Vardan Kushnir remained sure of his right to spam, saying it was what e-mails were for.

Under Russian law, spamming is not considered illegal, although lawmakers are working on legal projects that could protect Russian Internet users like they do in Europe and the U.S.

Posted by The Skipper     on 07/25/2005 at 02:46 PM   
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Blackmail

I am certainly glad I have a thick skull and a big head of hair. How else could I block out all those dangerous gamma rays that are penetrating the atmosphere and damaging the brains of so many people around the world? I sure save a lot of money on tin-foil, not having to build a new “barrier-hat” every day. The latest example of brain-damaged idiots is from .... Britain! Surprised? Not me. I just knew this was coming and it was only a matter of time before some idiot family member of the recently deceased Brazilian was contacted by some greedy barrister. It took a whole two days for the maggots to go after the police ....

Victim’s Family: Police Must Pay

^{Monday, July 25, 2005}

LONDON, England (CNN)—The family of a Brazilian man shot dead by armed police officers at a London subway station say they are considering legal action. Jean Charles de Menezes, a 27-year-old electrician, was killed in the aftermath of last Thursday’s attempted bombings of the London transit system. However police said on Saturday Menezes “was not connected” with the attacks.

Asked if his family was taking legal action, Menezes’ cousin Alex Alves Pereira said the police had to pay for the mistake.

“They have to pay for that in many ways, because if they do not, they are going to kill many people, they are going to kill thousands of people,” Pereira told BBC television. “They just kill the first person they see, that’s what they did.”

“They killed him because they had to show off. If they were so afraid of a bomb why did they let him get on the bus?”

Pereira said his family was upset and angry over the death, and he challenged police statements that Menezes failed to obey orders, and jumped a ticket barrier. He added that no amount of apologizing by police would bring his cousin back.

“When you do something wrong, you can’t have nothing to say—to say sorry is not enough.”

On Sunday Metropolitan Police Commissioner said he regretted Menezes’ death but defended the policy of shooting to kill suspected suicide bombers and warned that more people could be shot.

“To the family, I can only offer our deepest regrets,” Metropolitan Police Commissioner Ian Blair told Sky television. “I think we are quite comfortable that the policy is right, but of course these are fantastically difficult times. “It’s still happening out there, there are still officers having to make those calls as we speak,” he said, adding: “Somebody else could be shot.”

Posted by The Skipper     on 07/25/2005 at 08:45 AM   
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   Friday - July 22, 2005

Canadians Have Gone PC Insane

Our neighbors to the North have gone completely, insanely, madly, Barking-Moonbat CRAZY!

(NEWS24.COM)— 20/07/2005 07:45

Montreal - Canadian Miss Universe Natalie Glebova was forced to take off her official sash at a local festival celebrating Thailand when Toronto authorities invoked a law against sexual stereotyping.

The winner of the international beauty competition held in Bangkok in May, Glebova was to open the festival last weekend sporting her official beauty queen’s regalia.

However, city employees invoked a regulation against activities which degrade men and women through sexual stereotypes or exploit their bodies to attract attention.

Bowing to the local law, the 23 year old blue-eyed brunette was made to remove her “Miss Universe” sash, though not without complaint.

“I definitely don’t think that the Miss Universe title is any kind of stereotype or sexual stereotype,” said Russian-born Glebova, a graduate of Toronto’s Ryerson University.

Officials of the Miss Universe organisation were also unhappy.

“It’s a strict reading of the by-laws,” Paula Shugart, president of the organisation, said.

“According to those conditions, a beauty contest cannot even be held in Toronto”, Shugart said.

The Mayor of Toronto later apologized ....

Toronto Mayor David Miller has issued an apology to Miss Universe after the city barred her from opening a festival on municipal property over concerns about sexual stereotyping.

“It’s unfortunate and silly,” said Miller. “It won’t happen again.”

Natalie Glebova was set to open a festival last weekend at Nathan Phillips Square in front of City Hall, but municipal officials told organizers that the recently crowned Torontonian couldn’t perform that duty if she wore her sash or her tiara, or if she was introduced by her title.

They said beauty pageants and beauty queens were banned from the square by a bylaw that prohibits activities deemed to be degrading to men or women through sexual stereotyping.

Miller said it was all a mistake and an overreaction on someone’s part.

“[It’s] certainly not the way I read the bylaw,” he said. “I don’t think it’s appropriate. She should have been allowed to come to City Hall.”

Posted by The Skipper     on 07/22/2005 at 03:35 PM   
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   Thursday - July 21, 2005

Minutemen In San Diego

Our buddy Joe, down in New Zealand (formerly of San Diego) is all over a bunch of asshat leftists in San Diego who are angry that the Minutemen are coming to their town. Hell, it seems the ACLU was even there to “observe”. Joe has it covered with plenty of pictures and commentary ....

(BOHEMIAN CONSERVATIVE BLOG)—It’s the same old story, only in a new place. The Minuteman Project arrived in my former hometown of San Diego this past weekend, and the nut-job protestors from the mentally deranged, illigitimate Left were out in force. The seditious agitators, many carrying the banners of SocialistWorker.org and the anarchist flag, turned out in droves at the Campo VFW (private property, btw) where the Minutemen were having a BBQ social while, according to my insider present at the event, there were only 2 sherrif’s deputies present initially (you’ll notice that the media thought there were enough law enforcement present, but that was only after the protestors had been trespassing for quite a while.) Local TV news was present, but no coverage was shown on TV, according to my source. And, despite the title of the news story cited, “Border Watch and Protest Peaceful,” it would have been more accurate if the term “non-violent” was used instead of “peaceful.” According to my source, it was anything but peaceful, at least on behalf of the illigitimi from the Left.

Posted by The Skipper     on 07/21/2005 at 03:38 PM   
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Gaze Into The Abyss

Liberal bloggers + Roberts nomination = massive implosion of stupidity. Einstein couldn’t have put it better in this case ....

(WASHINGTON POST - 21 JULY)—At 1:27 a.m. yesterday, the Guerilla Women of Tennessee weighed in on President Bush’s Supreme Court nominee. “John Roberts: Married to Anti-Choice Org VP,” the group’s Web site blared. Another site, A Liberal Dose, asked: “Why does John G. Roberts Hate Our Soldiers?”

And Feministing.com made no attempt at subtlety: “Why John Roberts Sucks.”

The lightning-quick attacks came after 50 top liberal bloggers held a 45-minute conference call Tuesday night. “On the left, we’ve always talked about the need to have an echo chamber,” says John Aravosis, a Washington lawyer and gay rights activist who writes at Americablog.com. “We believe the right has a whole media network, from talk radio to Fox News to Matt Drudge. The left doesn’t have that because the left doesn’t play well with others.”

The conference call was arranged by BlogPAC, a political action committee that got some of its members on the phone with Sen. Ted Kennedy on the day that Sandra Day O’Connor announced she was leaving the court. The group has also held calls with Senate Minority Leader Harry Reid (Nev.), Sen. Russell Feingold (D-Wis.) and the liberal organizations involved in the nomination battle, including MoveOn, Alliance for Justice, NARAL and People for the American Way.

Kennedy “reached out to them directly to convey the impact that this decision will have on hundreds of millions of Americans, whose last line of defense for their freedoms and liberties is the Supreme Court,” says Laura Capps, the senator’s spokeswoman.

The purpose of Tuesday night’s call was “to agree on where we want to work as a swarm and divide that from where we want to work individually,” says Bob Brigham, a San Francisco political activist who runs BlogPAC. (Its founders include Aravosis and Markos Moulitsas, who runs the popular site Daily Kos.) A swarm, in online lingo, is when legions of bloggers jump on the same issue, as when conservative Web sites attacked Dan Rather’s CBS report on President Bush’s National Guard record.

“We dumped a ton of opposition research on Roberts” after the call, Brigham says. The bloggers also agreed during that discussion to keep hammering on Karl Rove and the CIA leak story.

The Liberal Dose site (which featured a doctored photo of Roberts making an obscene gesture) pointed to a 2004 ruling joined by Judge Roberts that threw out an award of nearly $1 billion to 17 Americans who said they were abused while imprisoned in Iraq during the 1991 Gulf War.

Aravosis, who helped expose the X-rated past of conservative White House reporter Jeff Gannon, wasted little time. He wrote Tuesday night that Roberts “sounds like a partisan hack” and posted statements from Democratic National Committee Chairman Howard Dean, Planned Parenthood, NARAL, the Human Rights Campaign and People for the American Way.

But Aravosis sees no prospect of his blogging colleagues sticking to a set of talking points. “It’s like herding cats,” he says. “You can get 40 cats in a room, but you can’t herd them.”

Posted by The Skipper     on 07/21/2005 at 03:51 AM   
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   Monday - July 18, 2005

Most Ridiculous Item Of The Day

(NEWSDAY-NY - July 18, 2005) A couple was caught having sex on top of a middle school in Port Jefferson Station on Sunday afternoon as people watched from street level, Suffolk police said.

Police said they arrested Rebekah Albee, 19, and Anthony Oddo, 24, after authorities were called about two naked people having sex atop John F. Kennedy Middle School. Police said when they arrived to the scene, they were able to see the pair having sex from street level. The two then took off when they saw that police had arrived; they were caught behind the school.

Albee, of Port Jefferson Station, and Oddo, who police said is homeless, are charged with third-degree criminal trespass and public lewdness. Oddo also is charged with resisting arrest. They are scheduled to be arraigned in First District Court on Monday.

Posted by The Skipper     on 07/18/2005 at 03:13 PM   
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   Sunday - July 17, 2005

Tragic Justice

Boy Who Fired Bottle Rockets Into Traffic Killed While Fleeing Angry Driver

SPANAWAY, Wash.—A 12-year-old boy who was firing bottle rockets at cars was chased into traffic Friday by an angry driver and killed by another car, authorities said.

The driver and his passenger, both 22, were arrested for investigation of manslaughter, the Washington State Patrol said.

The death came soon after midnight in this small town south of Tacoma, where the preteen and a 12-year-old cousin had been hiding in bushes while shooting the bottle rockets, trooper Johnny R. Alexander said.

A car stopped, and passenger Tyrone Sherrod got out, chased the cousin and started beating him, Alexander said. The driver, Mario N. Haley, chased the other boy, who ran onto the highway and was struck by a car driven by a 17-year-old girl.

Both men fled, but police found them at homes. Investigators determined the girl was not at fault.

Witnesses unsuccessfully tried to revive the boy struck by the car. His cousin was treated for injuries and released to his parents.

Tragic, to be sure, but I have to ask: What the hell was a 12 year-old doing out a midnight shooting bottle rockets at cars???

Posted by Drew458     on 07/17/2005 at 04:36 AM   
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   Friday - July 15, 2005

Drunk Of The Day Award

Some women have to be gotten drunk before a guy can impregnate them. Others evidently have to be totally soused before they produce the result. Today’s “Drunk Of The Day” award goes to this mother of seven .. one of whom is experiencing her first hangover at the ripe old age of .. oh .. ten minutes ....

BARTLESVILLE, Okla. - A woman has been arrested on child neglect charges after giving birth while drunk, police said. Melissa Irene Tanner, 37, is accused of having a blood alcohol content close to three times the legal limit when she gave birth to a baby girl on June 30. She is being held in jail with bail set at $30,000 and the baby has been placed in foster care.

The baby was not breathing upon birth and had to be administered a medication to counteract any narcotics that may have been present in the child’s system. After an emergency procedure by hospital staff, the child started breathing. Tanner reportedly has six other children. According to a July 11 probable cause affidavit filed in the case, Tanner told police she and another person had consumed a case of beer.

Ninety-nine bottles of beer in the delivery room, ninety-nine bottles of beer .. take one down, pass it around .. ninety-eight bottles of beer .... 

Posted by The Skipper     on 07/15/2005 at 05:45 AM   
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   Saturday - July 09, 2005

Send In The Clowns

I have found the perfect protest group for OldCatMan. In fact, I might join this group myself just for the entertainment value. Yes sirree folks, this is it.  The wave of the future.  The way to protest that’s catching on all over the globe.

I give you: The Clandestine Insurgent Rebel Clown Army

That’s right. Clowns.  Clowns as protesters.  An army of assclowns.  They have it all: Recruiting, training, operations manuals…all of it.  I found this part of their ops manual particularly funny:

Things to stuff your pockets with:

In order to mock the stop and search terrorist laws, which are regularly used to intimidate protestors, CIRCA clownbattants fill their pockets to the brim (which often makes CIRCA members seem more portly than they actually are!) with stupid things – strings of sausages, underwear, rubber ducks, pink furry stuffed pigs, sex toys, miniature garden gnomes, old bones, small tanks, rubber ducks, plungers and more, which all have to be laid out on the street and documented by the police during searches. Dozens of police officers searching an army of clowns is a weird enough sight, but when members of the public see all the objects being taken out the absurdity of the situation overflows.

We are rebels because we love life and happiness more than ‘revolution’. Because no revolution is ever complete and rebellions continues forever. Because we will dismantle the ghost-machine of abstraction with means that are indistinguishable from ends. Because we don’t want to change ‘the’ world, but ‘our’ world. Because we will always desert and disobey those who abuse and accumulate power. Because rebels transform everything - the way they live, create, love, eat, laugh, play, learn, trade, listen, think and most of all the way they rebel.

We are clowns because what else can one be in such a stupid world. Because inside everyone is a lawless clown trying to escape. Because nothing undermines authority like holding it up to ridicule. Because since the beginning of time tricksters have embraced life’s contradictions, creating coherence through confusion. Because fools are both fearsome and innocent, wise and stupid, entertainers and dissenters, healers and laughing stocks, scapegoats and subversives. Because buffoons always succeed in failing, always say yes, always hope and always feel things deeply. Because a clown can survive everything and get away with anything.

Posted by Drew458     on 07/09/2005 at 09:03 AM   
Filed Under: • Humor • Stoopid-People •  
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   Tuesday - July 05, 2005

Weird News Of The Day

What’s a guy to do? You try to help your sister by dressing up like her to take a test at college to help her out. How’s a guy to know his sister’s boobies weren’t really that big ....?

MOSCOW (Reuters) - A young Russian man who dressed in women’s clothes to take an exam for his sister was caught after his oversize bust gave him away, Interfax news agency reported Monday.

The youth’s “unusually prominent female features,” and heavy make-up drew security guards’ attention and they stopped him from taking the test, Yasen Zasursky, dean of Moscow State University’s journalism faculty, told the agency.

Posted by The Skipper     on 07/05/2005 at 01:42 PM   
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