Sunday - February 06, 2005

Those Were The Days, Comrade!

-- From MAD Magazine #60, January 1961

In his native Cuba in the 1950s, Prohias was an award-winning editorial cartoonist. After the revolution, his blistering caricatures drew Fidel Castro’s wrath. So in May 1960, Prohias fled to New York City, where he worked in a clothing factory by day and honed his cartoons at night. Inspired by the polarization he saw in his homeland—where anyone who was not a vocal Communist was dismissed as an infidel—Prohias devised his black and white spies. He once described them as “two sinister men who do terrible things—but to one another, and then nobody will make a fuss.” With Marta (then 14) along as translator, Prohias took the comic strips to MAD’s offices, where editors snapped them up. The Spies have appeared in virtually every issue of the magazine since (though other artists and writers “ghosted” the strip after illness forced Prohias’ retirement in the late ‘80s). Though the Cold War that spawned them is a fading memory, the Spies’ blood feud persists. MAD editor Meglin says he originally intended to publish only a few strips—but Prohias kept producing plot lines that were “so ingenious, I’d say, ‘Okay, maybe a couple more. And maybe a couple more.’

“Spy vs Spy, The Complete Casebook”, available from Amazon.

Posted by The Skipper     on 02/06/2005 at 12:57 PM   
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Chinese Calendars

If you read about Chinese astrology you may be familiar with what I am about to write.

A friend gave me a book a few years ago and it is rather fascinating.  Turns out I am a dragon. According to my horoscope, I am magnanimous, full of vitality and strength with life being a blaze of colors and me constantly on the go.  I am egotistical, eccentric, dogmatic, terribly demanding, proud, very direct and unreasonable demanding the same high standards and perfection from others that I have for myself and ...... (lots of other great stuff omitted) Not sure about the first but the rest are pretty much spot-on.

In China I am symbolized as an Emperor (Benevolent Dictator?) who, if angry and spurned can be like the big bad wolf at your door.

“What’s all this have to do with anything?” you may be asking yourselves.

A lot.

Beginning February 9th this will be the year of the rooster.

Apparently, if you are also a believer of Feng Shui, the year of the rooster requires certain actions take place to protect one’s self and provide luck warding off evil and bring harmony to life.

This can only be provided by a dragon.

So a company is selling underwear with dragons on them.  They claim a dragon balances the erratic nature of roosters.  They also say:

“If you have a dragon on your underpants you will be protected. Our feng shui master says that having something lucky in contact with your skin would bring spiritual balance”

Therefore I am issuing an Imperial Decree in which I volunteer my services to ensure that ladies have a great New Year. 

Yes, I offer myself.  Imagine, a “real” dragon in your pants bringing you something lucky in contact with your skin.

No men need apply. The “dragon” frowns on that.

Posted by Ranting Right Wing Howler     on 02/06/2005 at 09:21 AM   
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Today’s Blogging Theme

Posted by The Skipper     on 02/06/2005 at 09:01 AM   
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Super Bowl Trivia

I What was the name of the first ‘’Super Bowl’’?

II Both of the Patriots’ Super Bowl victories have been by three-point margins. What is the closest margin of victory in a Super Bowl?

III The winning team receives the Vince Lombardi Trophy. What is the name of the trophy presented to the MVP?

IV The Super Bowl had a scoreless first quarter last season. When was the previous Super Bowl to have a scoreless first quarter?

V True or false: A place-kicker never has won the MVP.

VI The Patriots’ Adam Vinatieri has kicked two game-winning field goals in the Super Bowl. Who is the first player to kick a game-winning field goal in a Super Bowl?

VII The Eagles are making their second Super Bowl appearance. Name five of the eight teams that have played in one Super Bowl.

VIII True or false: A Super Bowl never has gone into overtime.

IX Which Super Bowl received the highest TV rating?

X The Patriots’ Tom Brady completed a record 32 passes last season. Name the other quarterback to complete more than 30 passes in a Super Bowl game.

XI Who scored the first points in Super Bowl history?
a) Don Chandler
b) Curtis McClinton
c) Max McGee
d) Elijah Pitts

XII Who holds the record for most career points scored by a place-kicker?
a) Mike Cofer, 49ers
b) Roy Gerela, Steelers
c) Ray Wersching, 49ers
d) Don Chandler, Packers

XIII Brady has been named MVP twice in the Super Bowl. Which quarterback hasn’t won the award more than once?
a) Roger Staubach
b) Bart Starr
c) Joe Montana
d) Terry Bradshaw

XIV The Patriots’ Bill Belichick is attempting to win his third Super Bowl as head coach. Chuck Noll of the Steelers holds the record with four. Name the two coaches who have won three Super Bowls

XV Who was the Eagles’ coach in their only other Super Bowl appearance?

XVI Only one player has won the MVP while playing on the losing team. Who is he?

XVII Brady has a 64.0 career completion rate (40 attempts or more). Who has the highest career completion rate?
a) Joe Montana
b) Bart Starr
c) Troy Aikman
d) Phil Simms

XVIII The Panthers’ John Kasay kicked a 50-yard field goal in the Super Bowl last season. Who holds the record for the longest field in a Super Bowl?

XIX Who has the most sacks in a Super Bowl game?
a) Simeon Rice
b) Reggie White
c) L.C. Greenwood
d) Dexter Manley

XX Who has the longest run from scrimmage in Super Bowl history?
a) Marcus Allen
b) Larry Csonka
c) John Riggins
d) Timmy Smith

Bonus Who was the head coach of the Patriots in their first Super Bowl appearance?

To see the answers click here ....

Posted by The Skipper     on 02/06/2005 at 08:48 AM   
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Which?  Who?  (Part 4)

It’s that time of the week again.

Tell us which you’d chose and name her while you’re at it.

Posted by Ranting Right Wing Howler     on 02/06/2005 at 07:29 AM   
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More Sunday Humor

Two men are begging outside the Vatican, one holding up a star of David, and the other, a few yards away, holding up a crucifix.  Naturally, people are walking out of the Vatican, looking disdainfully at the Jew
and placing money in the beggar’s dish with the crucifix.

A priest, rather perturbed by the situation, goes up to the Jew and says:  “Do yourself a favor—move yourself to another part of town. You’ll do a lot better.”

The priest walks off and then the Jew calls out to the other beggar: “Hey Hymie, listen to him trying to tell us how to run OUR business!!!

Posted by Ranting Right Wing Howler     on 02/06/2005 at 07:22 AM   
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What Would We Do Without Professors?

From the Washington Post ....

■ “The end-zone dance is really quite similar to the strutting cock, celebrating the achievement of masculinity while emasculating the opponent,” says Jason Antrosio, an anthropology professor at Hartwick College in Oneonta, N.Y. Antrosio teaches a course on the rituals of cockfighting and he sees many parallels to the Super Bowl.

■ “The stadium arena of the Super Bowl is basically a cockpit on steroids,” Antrosio writes in an e-mail.

■ “The Super Bowl is an example of what anthropologist Alan Dundes calls a ‘thinly disguised symbolic homoerotic masturbatory phallic duel.’ “

■ Dundes is a legendary professor of anthropology and folklore at the University of California at Berkeley, and author of dozens of books, including “Interpreting Folklore” and “The Evil Eye.”

Posted by The Skipper     on 02/06/2005 at 07:16 AM   
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Political Humor

The Senate had been discussing the possibility of life in our solar system.  One Republican senator asked, “If there are people on other planets, why don’t they contact us ?”

The Majority Leader looked slowly around the chamber at his fellow Democratic senators and replied, sweeping his hand, “Would you ?”

Posted by Ranting Right Wing Howler     on 02/06/2005 at 07:12 AM   
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It’s Sunday.  We Need A Prayer.

And here’s one for you to show that we are multi-cultural.

The Ebonic Hail Mary (by John Trause)

Yo Mary,
You be all dat.
The Big Man be witchya.
Chillin’ be ya more than tha girlfriends,
And chill be the one on the way.
Phat Mary, Mother of The Big Man,
Rap for us gangstas,
Now and when we dead.
No Shit.

Posted by Ranting Right Wing Howler     on 02/06/2005 at 06:53 AM   
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Slipped One Through The DMV

In Texas I worked with a gal whose license plate was MIERDA 1

I asked her how she got away with it.  Her response?  “they are stupid.”

For you Spanish-challenged, “mierda” means “SHIT”

Well, maybe not as profane but actually quite clever is this one below:

Another clever tag on a HMV here in Hernando is “PO NO MO”

Give us your clever sightings.

Posted by Ranting Right Wing Howler     on 02/06/2005 at 06:47 AM   
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Word Of The Day

Isopraxism

1. “A non-learned neurobehavior in which members of a species act in a like manner” (Soukhanov 1993:135). 2. A deep, reptilian principle of mimicry, i.e., of copying, emulating, or aping a behavior, gesture, or fad. 3. An impulsive tendency to, e.g., a. stand and clap as audience members nearby stand and applaud, or b. wear the same style of jewelry, clothing, or shoes.

The word isopraxis (Greek iso-, “same”; Greek praxis, “behavior") was introduced by the neuroanatomist Paul D. MacLean, who first used it in print in 1975.

Examples include a. the simultaneous head-nodding of lizards, b. the group gobbling of turkeys, and c. the synchronous preening of birds. In human beings, isopraxism “is manifested in the hand-clapping of a theater audience and, on a larger scale, in historical mass migrations, in mass rallies, violence, and hysteria, and in the sudden widespread adoption of fashions and fads” (Soukhanov 1993:135).

Modern-day examples of isopraxism include both good isopraxism and bad isopraxism.

Now you know.

Posted by The Skipper     on 02/06/2005 at 06:44 AM   
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The Tone Of The Day

Don’t expect much serious stuff today, folks.  I have goofy stuff backed up that needs and outlet and today is it.

Soon you will see the trend form itself.

Posted by Ranting Right Wing Howler     on 02/06/2005 at 06:43 AM   
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   Saturday - February 05, 2005

Blame It On Rio

RIO DE JANEIRO, Brazil – Fat King Momo, the Lord of Misrule, declared Carnival open in the Brazilian city of Rio de Janeiro Friday and called on revelers to have fun but use condoms during five days of the world’s biggest party. The government is distributing 11 million condoms for free during the Carnival week in Brazil.

Posted by The Skipper     on 02/05/2005 at 07:17 PM   
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Salt In The Wound?

Just in case there are any leftist forons out there who are working their way through threrapy to get over P.E.S.T. and who are starting to wean themselves off of the Prozac, we offer the following to assist them in their recovery ....

Posted by The Skipper     on 02/05/2005 at 06:56 PM   
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Not that very many people ever read this far down, but this blog was the creation of Allan Kelly and his friend Vilmar. Vilmar moved on to his own blog some time ago, and Allan ran this place alone until his sudden and unexpected death partway through 2006. We all miss him. A lot. Even though he is gone this site will always still be more than a little bit his. We who are left to carry on the BMEWS tradition owe him a great debt of gratitude, and we hope to be able to pay that back by following his last advice to us all:

1. Keep a firm grasp of Right and Wrong
2. Stay involved with government on every level and don't let those bastards get away with a thing
3. Use every legal means to defend yourself in the event of real internal trouble, and, most importantly:
4. Keep talking to each other, whether here or elsewhere

It's been a long strange trip without you Skipper, but thanks for pointing us in the right direction and giving us a swift kick in the behind to get us going. Keep lookin' down on us, will ya? Thanks.

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