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calendar   Friday - January 20, 2006

Prison Fingers

I feel so much better when criminals “feel extremely remorseful”. I just know they’ve been rehabilitated when I hear that. We don’t need to punish them now. We can just let them go free knowing they have learned their lesson and will never be naughty again, right? ... Right? ...

Alright! Who dialed my “Satire” setting on this keyboard all the way up to the “Blatant Bullshit” setting? I gotta keep an eye on Oink who I just know is behind this. Regardless, I have a prediction to make about this criminal couple who got fingered by the long arm of the law: I predict that before they’ve been in prison a week one or both of them will discover ... something interesting ... in their prison food. The only question is ... what that “something interesting” might turn out to be ...

imageimageCouple Gets long Sentence In Finger Scam
SAN JOSE, California (Reuters)

A couple who planted a human finger in a bowl of chili at a Wendy’s fast food restaurant was sentenced in California on Wednesday to nine years in prison. “Greed and avarice overtook this couple and they lost their moral compass,” Judge Edward Davila said of Anna Ayala and her husband Jaime Plascencia in handing down the nine-year sentence.

The scam caused a sharp fall in sales at the third-largest U.S. burger chain, resulting in millions of dollars in lost revenue and a lingering impact to this day, officials say. Plascencia was given another three years and four months for not paying support for the five children he has with another woman in an unrelated case, giving him a total sentence of 12 years, four months behind bars.

Davila also ordered the couple to pay almost $22 million in restitution but Wendy’s officials indicated to the court they would only seek to collect approximately $170,000, representing the wages lost by employees at the San Jose restaurant where working hours were cut back after a downturn in business. “The crimes committed by the defendants have done immeasurable damage to Wendy’s image, not only in northern California, but across the country,” Denny Lynch, a Wendy’s senior vice president, told the court.

“We cannot put into words how it feels to have the company you’ve devoted your career to be subjected to grotesque humor on the late night TV talk shows in front of a national viewing audience.” Investigators determined Plascencia obtained the piece of finger from a co-worker who had lost the top of a digit in an industrial accident at a Las Vegas paving company. The man had turned over the finger fragment to settle a $50 debt.

Wendy’s International, based in Dublin, Ohio, paid a $100,000 reward for information to help establish the source of the severed finger. “I am truly sorry. I owe Wendy’s and its employees an apology,” a sobbing Ayala told the court. “Wendy’s had always been my family’s favorite fast food restaurant.” She called her actions “a moment of poor judgment,” and told her family: “For all the shame I brought upon them I am sorry, I am so sorry.”

Ayala, 40, who had been a Las Vegas resident, had said that she discovered the finger after buying the bowl of chili last March. She complained about the experience on national television and hired a lawyer, attracting wide attention to the bizarre incident. Ayala’s attorney Rick Ehler accused prosecutor David Boyd of using the media attention to get a tough sentence. “It seems as though the prosecution tried to exert some judicial pressure through the media,” Ehler said.

“I am extremely remorseful,” said Plascencia, 43, who, like his wife, wore prison clothes to the hearing at which television cameras were permitted. Plascencia’s attorney Charles Kramer said the probation department’s recommendation of 11 years for his client was excessive. “I was quite surprised at the harshness of the probation department’s recommendation,” Kramer said. “Judge Davila going over and above that shocks me even more.”


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Posted by The Skipper   United States  on 01/20/2006 at 05:56 PM   
Filed Under: • Satire •  
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