BMEWS
 
Sarah Palin will pry your Klondike bar from your cold dead fingers.

calendar   Saturday - April 08, 2006

In The Beginning …

Just over 60 years ago, this little fellow shown taped to the log below became the ancestor of millions of terrorists who have plagued computer programmers for over 60 years now. This “Lord Of The Flies” was discovered by Admiral Grace Murray Hopper (who later developed the evil programming language, COBOL) trapped between points at Relay # 70, Panel F of the Mark II Aiken Relay Calculator while it was being tested at Harvard University, 9 September 1945. The operators affixed the moth to the computer log, with the entry: “First actual case of bug being found”. They put out the word that they had ”debugged” the machine, thus introducing the term “debugging a computer program”.

Unfortunately for mankind, the creature had already spawned and left behind numerous prodigy that spread quickly through the new machines in a manner reminiscent of a Biblical plague that Moses would have been proud of. Numerous attempts have been made to eradicate this evil species of machine terrorist with absolutely no success whatsoever. Entire legions of computer scientists have spent their lives devising new computer languages designed to shield software from these creatures (anyone remember ADA?), all to no avail. Decades have been spent in laboratories designing methodologies like the Capability Maturity Model and ISO-9000 to keep these radical suicide bombers at bay. It has been an exercise in futility.

No, mankind is doomed to defeat at the hands of these invaders into our computer companions. Even now, these creatures have bridged the gap between machine and man, inflicting their malicious logic defects into human beings, the most blatant example of which are Liberals, Leftists, Democrats, the French, Arabs and OldCatMan. The enemy has taken the fight to our very doorsteps. Our fellow human beings are being infected by these malicious organisms. What can you do? Easy. Find a Liberal, Leftist, Democrat, Frenchman, Arab (or OldCatMan) and rip their skull open. Then lean over the gaping gray matter and yell “SHUT THE F**K UP”. Note: repeated treatment may be necessary for some of these infected humans (like Z-Woof). Proceed with caution.

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Posted by The Skipper   United States  on 04/08/2006 at 03:22 PM   
Filed Under: • Fun-Stuff •  
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THE SERVICES AND MATERIALS ON THIS WEBSITE ARE PROVIDED "AS IS" AND THE HOSTS OF THIS SITE EXPRESSLY DISCLAIMS ANY AND ALL WARRANTIES, EXPRESS OR IMPLIED, TO THE EXTENT PERMITTED BY LAW INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO WARRANTIES OF SATISFACTORY QUALITY, MERCHANTABILITY OR FITNESS FOR A PARTICULAR PURPOSE, WITH RESPECT TO THE SERVICE OR ANY MATERIALS.

Not that very many people ever read this far down, but this blog was the creation of Allan Kelly and his friend Vilmar. Vilmar moved on to his own blog some time ago, and Allan ran this place alone until his sudden and unexpected death partway through 2006. We all miss him. A lot. Even though he is gone this site will always still be more than a little bit his. We who are left to carry on the BMEWS tradition owe him a great debt of gratitude, and we hope to be able to pay that back by following his last advice to us all:
  1. Keep a firm grasp of Right and Wrong
  2. Stay involved with government on every level and don't let those bastards get away with a thing
  3. Use every legal means to defend yourself in the event of real internal trouble, and, most importantly:
  4. Keep talking to each other, whether here or elsewhere
It's been a long strange trip without you Skipper, but thanks for pointing us in the right direction and giving us a swift kick in the behind to get us going. Keep lookin' down on us, will ya? Thanks.

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Oh, and here's some kind of visitor flag counter thingy. Hey, all the cool blogs have one, so I should too. The Visitors Online thingy up at the top doesn't count anything, but it looks neat. It had better, since I paid actual money for it.
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