Tuesday - October 21, 2008

Girl, 13, has sex ‘rewarded’ by mother with cigarettes.  (Could this be a new age trend?)

This is NOT what I thought was going to be my first post of the new day. In fact, I have something almost worse lined up from the department of illogic. (DOL)
They love initials here and never pass an excuse to use em.
Anyway ... this really does defy any sort of logical, rational parental behavior.  Even I know that and I have never been a parent.  But, well,,, what do I know?
I guess you will have to read the story.  Maybe we should feel sorry for mom?  Like, she felt she couldn’t control things and so gave up?  How’d the kid get to be this way to begin with? How do any? 

Girl, 13, who smokes drinks and has sex ‘rewarded’ by mother with cigarettes
A 13-year-old girl who has had four sexual partners, smokes dope, drinks beer and has been excluded from school 40 times is considered “sweet” by her mother and given cigarettes as rewards for good behaviour.

By Aislinn Simpson
Last Updated: 7:28AM BST 21 Oct 2008

Tracy Holt, 43, says there are a “lot worse things” her daughter Sam could be doing than smoking 15 cigarettes a day, and believes that because she herself hasn’t yet suffered from cancer, “she’ll probably be alright anyway”.

(My kid brother died age 46 from lung cancer. He was six years my junior. I smoked unfiltered Lucky Strikes for 38 years before I quit.  I have no lung problem. Or I didn’t then and feel ok now.  But this lady is nuts to believe her daughter might not get smoker’s cancer because mom doesn’t have it now. Why chance it?  And my arteries on one side are not too good. Part diet sure, but part old smokers damage I think.  Nobody told me that. It’s just a feeling I have and might be groundless.  But I sure as heck wouldn’t encourage a kid to start as I did at 13.  Back then, way back then, we didn’t all make the connection. It is NOT an easy way to go either. Oh boy, if she has one, this little girl has a long life ahead of her.  What’s it gonna be like for her? Scary thought.)

She knows her daughter hangs out with friends in the street, drinking cans of lager and smoking pot, but says she is simply glad Sam is not “a proper drunk” and has not graduated to harder drugs.

“I don’t see the point in punishing her. If I ground her, I’m just punishing myself because I have to put up with her in the house,” she said.

“Instead, I reward her good behaviour by giving her cigarettes. If she’s bad, she goes without.

“She’s a little comedian. I let her get away with a lot of cheek. It’s sweet.”

Mrs Holt, a jobless single mother with two other grown-up children who smokes 20 cigarettes a day herself, said giving them out as a reward “works”.

She said: “There are a lot worse things she could be doing. We’ve all got to die sometime. I haven’t got cancer from smoking so she’ll probably be all right anyway.”

Sam agrees that she will do more around the family home, in Gosport, Hampshire, when bribed.

“If Mum tells me to tidy my room, I ignore her but if she offers me a fag, I do it,” she said.

She admits to having had four sexual partners in less than a year, but told Closer magazine: “I only sleep with boyfriends. I worry about getting pregnant because I don’t want kids until I’m married so I always use condoms.”

Sam lost her virginity when she was 12, and told her mother shortly afterwards. Miss Holt said she was shocked at first but hid her feelings well.

“I thought it was a joke, so I laughed,” she said. “I was disappointed. No mother wants to know her 12-year-old is having sex but I’m glad she told me.

“I didn’t show I was angry and just kept it to myself.”

She went on: “It wasn’t a one-night stand. She had been dating the guy for a couple of weeks. I took her to the doctor’s the next day to get her on the Pill. I’ve told her to use condoms.”

Sam’s track record at school leaves a lot to be desired, and she has been excluded for bad behaviour more than 40 times.

“Sam got suspended for the first time after she climbed on to the school roof,” she said.

“I shouted at her and then explained she shouldn’t climb on roofs because she could fall off. I didn’t know what else to do.”

She believes her daughter’s behaviour is down to the teachers at her school who were “too soft” with her.

“Now she is at a special school where there are fewer kids in each class,” she said.

“Hopefully these teachers will be stricter and she will finally get the discipline that’s needed.”

* The full interview with Sam and Tracy Holt appears in Closer magazine.

http://tinyurl.com/64mvuo this link is for the Telegraph.

Posted by Drew458     on 10/21/2008 at 02:47 AM   
Filed Under: • Daily Life • Insanity • News-Briefs • Sex • UK •  
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