BMEWS
 
Death once had a near-Sarah Palin experience.

calendar   Thursday - July 30, 2009

Art vs Porn

Somewhere in one of those Terry Pratchett books, Thud! I think, the Keystone Cops pair of watchmen, Sergeant Colon and Corporal Nobbs, are in the art museum, discussing the difference between art and smut. Cpl. Nobbs, a man so odd looking that he carries a certificate that proves he’s human, has been dating a drop dead bombshell beauty who works as a stripper. (cops are cops everywhere in the multiverse!)

Nobby says that his girlfriend, Tawneee, a pole dancer “says what she does is Art, sarge. And she wears more clothes than a lot of the women on the walls around here, so why be sniffy about it?”

“Yeah, but...” Fred Colon hesitated here. He knew in his heart that spinning around upside down around a pole wearing a costume you could floss with definitely was not Art, and being painted lying on a bed wearing nothing but a smile and a small bunch of grapes was good solid Art, but putting your finger on why this was the case was a bit tricky.

“No urns,” he said at last.

“What urns?” said Nobby.

“Nude women are only Art if there’s an urn in it,” said Fred Colon. This sounded a bit weak even to him, so he added, “or a plinth. Both is best, o’course. It’s a secret sign, see, that they put in to say that it is Art and okay to look at.”

“What about a potted plant?”

“That’s okay if it’s in an urn.”

“What about if it’s not got an urn or a plinth or a potted plant?” said Nobby.

“Have you one in mind, Nobby?” said Colon, suspiciously.

“Yes, The Goddess Anoia arising from the Cutlery,” said Nobby. “They’ve got it here. It was painted by a bloke with three i’s in his name, which sounds pretty artistic to me.”

“The number of i’s is important, Nobby,” said Sergeant Colon gravely, “but in these situations you have to ask yourself: where’s the cherub? If there’s a little fat pink kid holding a mirror or a fan or similar, then it’s still okay. Even if he’s grinning. Obviously you can’t get urns everywhere.”




Decorated firearms are the same way, only no cherubs. Usually. Sometimes you just have to know.

Fer instance ...


This is art


image



And this is art

image


Although both might be pretty near the limits of good taste for some folks.



And this is porn

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Posted by Drew458   United States  on 07/30/2009 at 12:49 AM   
Filed Under: • Art-PhotographyGuns and Gun ControlTyrants and Dictators •  
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Oh, and here's some kind of visitor flag counter thingy. Hey, all the cool blogs have one, so I should too. The Visitors Online thingy up at the top doesn't count anything, but it looks neat. It had better, since I paid actual money for it.
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