Sunday - October 16, 2005

Divided Time

Sorry I haven’t posted much here today. I’ve been busy over at the other blog. I finally decided to dive into the style sheets and PHP code in order to personalize The ArgoKnot. After all, it’s more personal to me than good ol’ BMEWS here. I have finally gotten the blog looking the way I want and I also have decided on a regular schedule.

I will be posting a new editorial twice a week, on Sundays and Wednesdays. Warning: the other blog is purely an exercise in creative writing and an attempt to generate a Socratic dialogue on current events. You may agree or disagree with the essays but as long as I’ve started you thinking, I’ve made a good start. Today’s offering is entitled “An Abundance Of Lies”. Enjoy!

Posted by The Skipper     on 10/16/2005 at 03:18 PM   
Filed Under: • Personal •  
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You Might Be A Redneck

Jeff Foxworthy has made a fortune off of redneck jokes. It’s time to set the record straight. The term “redneck” is derived from the description of many millions of farmers, construction workers and other ordinary Americans who work out in the hot sun all day. They are usually stooped over lifting heavy objects or clearing plows or digging out drainage ditches. This results in a lot of sun hitting the back of their necks, i.e., sunburned necks. The term actually has nothing to do with intelligence except as an elite Liberal’s way of looking down on “the common man”. Here is the real version of the Redneck Test ....

• You might be a redneck if: It never occurred to you to be offended by the phrase, “One nation, under God.”


• You might be a redneck if: You’ve never protested about seeing the 10 Commandments posted in public places.


• You might be a redneck if: You still say “Christmas” instead of “Winter Festival.”


• You might be a redneck if: You bow your head when someone prays.


• You might be a redneck if: You stand and place your hand over your heart when they play the National Anthem.


• You might be a redneck if: You treat Viet Nam vets with great respect, and always have.


• You might be a redneck if: You’ve never burned an American flag.


• You might be a redneck if: You know what you believe and you aren’t afraid to say so, no matter who is listening.


• You might be a redneck if: You respect your elders and expect your kids to do the same.


• You might be a redneck if: You’d give your last dollar to a friend.

-- The Skipper (a redneck and proud of it since 1949)

Posted by The Skipper     on 10/16/2005 at 09:31 AM   
Filed Under: • Personal •  
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Two Wrongs Don’t Make A Right

Take twenty four members of the so-called National Socialist Party in America (Nazis), put them in a protest march in Toledo, Ohio protesting black gangs who allegedly have been harassing neighborhoods ....

Emergency Declared After Anti-Nazi Riots
TOLEDO, Ohio (AP)

At least two dozen members of the National Socialist Movement, which calls itself “America’s Nazi Party,” had gathered at a city park to march under police protection. Organizers said they were demonstrating against black gangs they said were harassing white residents.

.... and then see what happens in the streets when the aforementioned black gangs decide to crash the party ....

A crowd protesting a white supremacists’ march Saturday turned violent, throwing baseball-sized rocks at police, vandalizing vehicles and stores, and setting fire to a neighborhood bar, authorities said.

The violence broke out about one-quarter of a mile away along the planned march route shortly before it was to begin. One group of men pounded on a convenience store, and others overturned vehicles. There was a report of a shooting but police hadn’t found a victim, Police Chief Mike Navarre said.

When the rioting began, [Mayor Jack] Ford tried to negotiate with those involved, but “they weren’t interested in that.” He said people in the crowd swore at him and wanted to know why he was protecting the Nazis.

They were mostly “gang members who had real or imagined grievances and took it as an opportunity to speak in their own way,” Ford said.

Is anyone really surprised? I don’t have any sympathy at all for either the Nazis or the black gangs. They both were doing exactly what they normally do ... the Nazis were stirring up trouble by pointing the finger of blame at the black gangs and the black gangs just obliged them by doing what they normally do - namely rioting, burning and looting. This is why I’m not a policeman. I would have been tempted to just gun down both groups and go home and call it a day ...

Go read the rest here ... and try to keep in mind that both sides were wrong and that doesn’t make it right ...

Posted by The Skipper     on 10/16/2005 at 07:57 AM   
Filed Under: • Crime • Stoopid-People •  
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Carter? Just Say No!

Will we never be rid of Jimmy Carter and his evil spawn? Four years in office and the man tried to give away the country. Then he has spent the last twenty years complaining about every President since then (except Bubba Clinton). Now his son wants to be a Senator? Get real! I hope the people in Nevada have enough sense not to send this asshat to Washington. From what I read, he’s just another Democratic druggy (see below). What is it about Democrats and drugs? Aren’t their brains fried enough already ... ?

Carter’s Son Aims Barbs at Bush
ELKO, Nevada (AP)

Jack Carter, the son of the former president, took aim at the Bush administration Saturday during his first stop on a tour to gauge support for a possible run for U.S. Senate. Carter, 58, said he would announce in a month whether he’ll challenge Republican Sen. John Ensign, who is seeking a second term in 2006.

Nevada has nearly even voter registration among Republicans and Democrats. Carter started his tour in a Republican stronghold 290 miles east of Reno, speaking to about 35 people at a meeting of the Elko County Democratic Central Committee.

He avoided any sharp criticism of Ensign and instead attacked the Bush administration. Carter said the administration was waging a misguided campaign against terror, and he criticized President Bush’s call to spend $200 billion rebuilding the hurricane-ravaged Gulf Coast without a tax increase or major spending cuts.

“How can anybody do that and not pay for doing it?” he asked. “To me, that was just irresponsible. “I think the most significant issue right now is this concept of responsibility in government. It’s not a matter of being conservative or liberal. Government needs to do the job and we’ve gotten away from that aspect.”

Carter said the problem he has with Ensign is his support for the Bush administration. He also said he doesn’t think revelations about past drug use would hurt his chances; he has admitted he was discharged from the Navy 35 years ago for smoking marijuana.

Carter was in his late 20s when his father, Jimmy Carter, won the presidency. He and his wife currently run an investment consulting firm in Las Vegas. Carter said both his father and Senate Democratic Leader Harry Reid of Nevada have expressed support.

Posted by The Skipper     on 10/16/2005 at 07:42 AM   
Filed Under: • Democrats-Liberals-Moonbat Leftists •  
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Sunday Funnies

Today’s “Hedge” strip kinda reminded me of this blog. Sammy and Verne’s exchange brings back memories of many such exchanges between Oink and OldCatMan. The part of R.J. Racoon is played rather adroitly by myself, of course ...

Posted by The Skipper     on 10/16/2005 at 07:28 AM   
Filed Under: • Humor •  
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   Saturday - October 15, 2005

Cellular Conspiracy

Picture this ... you’re driving along the interstate, doing 80 in a 70mph zone. Suddenly your cell phone starts ringing. As you reach over to answer it, you notice flashing blue lights in your rear view mirror. You answer the phone. A stern voice says to you, “Pull over. You’re under arrest for speeding.” Welcome to Missouri ...

Missouri May Track Cell Phones for Traffic Data
JEFFERSON CITY, Mo (AP)

Driving to work, you notice the traffic beginning to slow. And because you have your cell phone on, the government senses the delay, too. A congestion alert is issued, automatically updating electronic road signs and Web sites and dispatching text messages to mobile phones and auto dashboards. In what would be the largest project of its kind, the Missouri Department of Transportation is finalizing a contract to monitor thousands of cell phones, using their movements to map real-time traffic conditions statewide on all 5,500 miles of major roads.

It’s just one of a number of initiatives to more intelligently manage traffic flow through wireless data collection. Officials say there’s no Big Brother agenda in the Missouri project — the data will remain anonymous, leaving no possibility to track specific people from their driveway to their destination. But privacy advocates are uneasy nonetheless. “Even though its anonymous, it’s still ominous,” said Daniel Solove, a privacy law professor at George Washington University and author of “The Digital Person.” “It troubles me, because it does show this movement toward using a technology to track people.”

Cell phone monitoring already is being used by transportation officials in Baltimore, though not yet to relay traffic conditions to the public. Similar projects are getting underway in Norfolk, Va., and a stretch of Interstate 75 between Atlanta and Macon, Ga. But the Missouri project is by far the most aggressive — tracking wireless phones across the whole state, including in rural areas with lower traffic counts, and for the explicit purpose of relaying the information to other travelers.

Go read the rest here ... and turn off your cell phone ...

Posted by The Skipper     on 10/15/2005 at 11:12 PM   
Filed Under: • Science-Technology •  
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That’s Entertainment?

Posted by The Skipper     on 10/15/2005 at 05:05 PM   
Filed Under: • Hollywood •  
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Dangerous Criminal Captured

There are only two things that are certain ... but at least death doesn’t pull you over and arrest you at gunpoint when you get slightly ill. The taxman, on the other hand, will come after you with guns blazing for that last red cent you owe him. Don’t believe it? Just ask Deborah Combs ... provided they haven’t executed her by now ...

Ohio Police Arrest Woman For $1 In Unpaid Taxes
LOVELAND, Ohio (WKMG)

An Ohio woman was arrested after she didn’t pay just more than $1 that she owed in income taxes, WLWT-TV in Cincinnati reported. Deborah Combs owed the city of Loveland $1.16 last year, but she also hadn’t filed her city income tax forms in five years, the television station said. She said officers pulled her over and acted as though she were a violent criminal.

“One sheriff approached my car with his hand on his gun,” she said. “Another from the other side of the car leaned in and said, ‘Are you Deborah Combs?’ He said, ‘We have a warrant for your arrest.’ I was absolutely shocked.” Combs said she thinks the arrest and charges are over-the-top for the amount she owed. “What they’ve spent in stamps is more than what I owe,” she said.

She could also end up paying hundreds of dollars in fines for the unfiled tax forms, the television station reported. Loveland City Manager Fred Enderle said the amount Combs owes isn’t the real issue. “Whether it’s $1 they owe us or $1,000, it’s not fair to the rest of the public to not pursue that person,” he said. “There is some expense involved, but it goes back to the principle. We have laws. The laws have to be complied with. At what cost do you stop enforcing the law?” Combs is scheduled to appear in court Oct. 20.

Posted by The Skipper     on 10/15/2005 at 12:51 PM   
Filed Under: • Crime • Outrageous •  
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Pooch Purse?

A million years ago, a wild dog wandered in close to the campfire built by those crazy hairless monkeys who surrounded the fire keeping warm. This poor little doggie was at first apprehensive about these ugly creatures that walked upright but they threw him some food, and so he decided to check them out further instead of biting them on the ass. He eventually concluded they were slightly crazy but basically alright and decided to stick around to see where they were going. That was its first mistake ....

The Original Puppy Purse
(Puppypurse.com)

We at PuppyPurse are, first and foremost, dog lovers. We would, if we could, have our pups at our sides all the time and everywhere. Some time ago we noticed that other people DID have their puppies at their sides. All the time. Everywhere it seemed!

But they were taking them along stuffed into deep, dark, sweltering-in-the-summer-heat handbags, as they would their wallets, car keys, or packets of tissues. At that point we looked our own little friends in their furry little faces and said, “There has to be a better way.”

PuppyPurse was designed to keep your diminutive doggie and you, their adoring human, inseparable. Your pup will ride at your side in open air comfort—no stuffy handbags! And they’ll do it in style, snuggly wrapped in a bodice of spongy waffle, luxurious faux fur, or one of our other hand selected materials. Finishing touches like fringes, beads, or feathers add a fashion flair that will make them the envy of their peers!

Whether you wear it like a shoulder bag, a fanny pack, or carry it like a purse, PuppyPurse lets you find the perfect fit for you and your dog. You will spend the day close and comfortable, and ready for anything. Anytime. Everywhere.

Posted by The Skipper     on 10/15/2005 at 12:21 PM   
Filed Under: • Odd-Strange •  
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Tata News Update

Let it not be said that BMEWS ever let a week go by without running at least one post about tatas ....

Coming Soon: The Mp3 Breast Implant
(THE REGISTER - UK)

Here’s an appealing thought: an mp3 breast implant which will allow surgically-enhanced girls to store and play back their entire music collections from their 36DD assets.

We kid you not. According to UK tabloid the Sun - ever watchful for life-enhancing technology, especially when it’s got a big jugs angle - BT Laboratories bod Ian Pearson reckons breast implants may as well do something useful if they’re to be permanently installed, rather than just looking decorative.

Accordingly, he’s proposed sticking an mp3 player in one dug, and a storage chip in the other. Quite how playback is achieved we’re not quite sure*, but it may well involve the listener burying his or her head in the cleavage for a full stereo effect.

Likewise, God alone knows how you select tracks, but breasts do come equipped with a pleasing alternative to the iPod’s selector wheel. We can imagine the scenario: Girlfriend: “Oi, what the bloody hell are you doing?” Boyfriend: “Hold on, I’m just scrolling down to Stairway to Heaven.”

* Footnote: Oh, OK then - Ian Pearson said “flexible plastic electronics would sit inside the breast. A signal would be relayed to headphones, while the device would be controlled by Bluetooth using a panel on the wrist”. We prefer our solutions, naturally.

Posted by The Skipper     on 10/15/2005 at 12:06 PM   
Filed Under: • Fun-Stuff •  
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Mystery Girl

Below is an early picture of the woman I am deeply, madly in love with. This is a picture of her as a teenager. She is a bit older and much prettier nowadays. Can you guess who this little teenage girl grew up to be? If you guess correctly, could you please tell her I want to have her baby ....

Posted by The Skipper     on 10/15/2005 at 09:32 AM   
Filed Under: • Fun-Stuff •  
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If Only ….

_{Eric Allie,Chicago}

Posted by The Skipper     on 10/15/2005 at 09:19 AM   
Filed Under: • Humor •  
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Most Ridiculous Item Of The Week

This past week has been full of stupid. However, the following news story tops them all ...

Man Faces Murder Charge in 1973 Shooting
NEW YORK (AP)

A suspect was charged Friday with murder in the death last year of a man who had been shot 32 years earlier during a racial dispute. Jose Colon, 47, died from infections related to gunshot wounds suffered when he was 15, a medical examiner ruled. The shooting paralyzed Colon from the neck down.

Ralph Alini, who already served three years for the shooting, was arrested Thursday after a grand jury indicted him on a second-degree murder charge. The 54-year-old from Staten Island was ordered held without bail. Defense attorney Philip J. Smallman told reporters outside court that he would challenge the medical examiner’s homicide finding. He said his client was shocked by his arrest.

“He was quite surprised to be visited by the police department at his home for something that occurred a number of years ago,” Smallman said. Colon was shot during a racially charged clash between Hispanics and Italians in June 1973 in Brooklyn, according to authorities. Alini, an Italian American, allegedly fired his gun from a rooftop into a crowd and struck Colon, a Puerto Rican.

Alini and a second suspect were charged with attempted murder, assault and reckless endangerment. A jury convicted both men but an appeals court overturned the verdict because the judge erred by allowing one attorney to represent both defendants. The men pleaded guilty to reckless endangerment in 1978 and served three year sentences. The second defendant was killed in 1980s in an unsolved homicide, officials said. “Finally, someone is going to pay for what they did to my brother,” said Colon’s sister, Esther.

Posted by The Skipper     on 10/15/2005 at 09:09 AM   
Filed Under: • Crime •  
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Behind Enemy Lines

It’s Saturday morning and I decided to do a little spy work behind enemy lines. No, I’m not talking about Democratic Underwear. I decided to go spy out the most evil bunch of critters in existence ... the World Socialist Web Site! Below is a small sample of the propaganda being spewed from the far, far Left. It is pretty much a self-parody and hilarious to read. Right, comrade?

Iraqis To Vote On Neo-colonial Constitution

The referendum today in Iraq on the draft constitution is a cynical and, for the Iraqi people, humiliating event. Far from an exercise in self-determination, it is the next stage in a US-crafted, but increasingly crisis-ridden process aimed at turning Iraq into an American client state in the Middle East.

Bush, Cheney, Rumsfeld and others among the clique responsible for the illegal 2003 invasion will use today’s vote to justify their crimes with the claim that “democracy” is being realised in Iraq. In reality, even the date of the referendum was determined according to a schedule determined in Washington. For its own political purposes, the Bush administration insisted that a constitution be adopted this month so elections can be held in December and a government formed that advances US objectives.

The new regime in Baghdad will be bound to privatise Iraq’s oil industry and sign off on a status-of-forces agreement sanctioning long-term US military bases in the country. What is now Article 109 of the document declares that the oil and gas wealth of Iraq must be developed on the basis of “market principles” and in a manner that “encourages investment”. Article 24 dictates “the reform of the Iraqi economy in accordance with modern economic principles”, which encourage the “development of the private sector”.

The remainder of the constitution is riddled with absurdities and inconsistencies. Various clauses assert the rights of women and non-Muslim minorities, but Islam has the status of “official religion of the state” and no law can contradict the “established provisions of Islam”. Freedom of speech, of the press and of assembly, is given constitutional protection, but only in a “way that does not violate public order and morality”. The document prohibits arbitrary arrest, coerced confessions and imprisonment by foreign entities, yet the US-led occupation forces have thousands of Iraqis imprisoned without charges and will continue to do so, constitutional guarantees or not.

The mass of the Iraqi people has had no say in the document’s formulation. It was drawn up in sordid negotiations between the US ambassador, Zalmay Khalilzad, the Kurdish nationalist parties that preside over an autonomous region in the north, and the Shiite fundamentalist parties that dominate the oil-rich southern provinces of Iraq. Large portions of the document were most likely written in the US embassy.

In return for their collaboration with its plans, the US has paid off the Kurdish and Shiite parties with a constitution that sanctions the establishment of federal “regions” in the areas they control. These regions will have considerable powers over oil revenues and the right to maintain their own “internal security forces”. The constitution establishes the mechanisms for the Kurdish region to be expanded to include the main oil-producing area in the north around the city of Kirkuk.

Go read the rest here. Try not to laugh too hard ...

Posted by The Skipper     on 10/15/2005 at 07:51 AM   
Filed Under: • Democrats-Liberals-Moonbat Leftists • Stoopid-People •  
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Not that very many people ever read this far down, but this blog was the creation of Allan Kelly and his friend Vilmar. Vilmar moved on to his own blog some time ago, and Allan ran this place alone until his sudden and unexpected death partway through 2006. We all miss him. A lot. Even though he is gone this site will always still be more than a little bit his. We who are left to carry on the BMEWS tradition owe him a great debt of gratitude, and we hope to be able to pay that back by following his last advice to us all:

1. Keep a firm grasp of Right and Wrong
2. Stay involved with government on every level and don't let those bastards get away with a thing
3. Use every legal means to defend yourself in the event of real internal trouble, and, most importantly:
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It's been a long strange trip without you Skipper, but thanks for pointing us in the right direction and giving us a swift kick in the behind to get us going. Keep lookin' down on us, will ya? Thanks.

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