Friday - September 16, 2005

Gas Wars

There is a gas war going on in Britain even as I speak. British motorists are staging protests with convoys in Wales so Britain’s two largest petrol dealers cut their prices. Now Brits should be happy, right? Well, using my handy-dandy Barking Moonbat Calculator/Currency Converter, I crunched the numbers and it appears that 89.9p per litre works out to approximately $6.13 per gallon. Down from 92.9p ($6.36 per gallon). Yeah, that’d make me happy. How about you ....?

Asda and Tesco Cut Petrol Prices
(BBC NEWS)

Predictions that UK petrol prices are on their way down proved correct after two fuel retailers promised to cut prices at the pump. Both Asda and Tesco are cutting up to four pence off a litre of petrol. Prices are coming down as global oil and petrol prices retreat from post-Hurricane Katrina highs. On Thursday, oil prices reversed early gains with US light crude down 34 cents to $64.75, while London Brent fell 21 cents to settle at $63.91 a barrel.

Asda and Tesco are dropping their prices from Friday. The cuts come after muted demonstrations by fuel protesters, who are also planning a major go-slow along the M4 motorway during rush hour. Friday is the last of three days of protests by the Fuel Lobby, which is calling on the government to cut fuel tax. UK petrol prices are among the highest in Europe, with 67% of the total cost going on tax.

Retailers said this week’s protests have had little impact and said petrol stations should be back to normal by the weekend after a spate of panic-buying by motorists earlier this week. “Next week, when things have calmed down against, we’ll see prices fall due to falling wholesale prices,” said the Petrol Retailers’ Association said earlier this week.

Asda said it would cut the cost of petrol to a maximum of 89.9p a litre at its 158 petrol stations and diesel to 92.9p a litre. “Drivers have been ripped-off in the past 10 days as drivers rushed to fill up,” said Tony Page, general merchandise director at Asda. Meanwhile, Tesco said it was cutting prices from 0600 BST on Friday at all its 380 petrol stations by up to 4p a litre. “The price of petrol has fallen and we are passing those savings back to shoppers as soon as we can,” a Tesco spokeswoman said.

Posted by The Skipper     on 09/16/2005 at 05:49 AM   
Filed Under: • Economics •  
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Home Improvement

_{Matt Davies, The Journal News}

Posted by The Skipper     on 09/16/2005 at 05:24 AM   
Filed Under: • Humor •  
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   Thursday - September 15, 2005

Almost Totally Useless News

Today’s Almost Totally Useless News report is courtesy of Britney Spears ....

Britney Gives Birth to Preston Michael Spears Federline
(EITB24)

Britney Spears has given birth to a baby boy. The baby was born Wednesday shortly before 1 p.m, by Caesarean section at the Santa Monica UCLA Medical Centre in California, the magazine said. No other details were available.

A call to Spears’ publicist by The Associated Press wasn’t immediately returned. It is the first child for the 23-year-old pop star and her husband, Kevin Federline. Federline, 27, has two children with ex-girlfriend.

Husband/aspiring rapper Kevin Federline, 27, arrived at the hospital with a police escort shortly before 6 a.m. and medical staff whisked Spears into a birthing suite.

According to hospital sources, Spears was wheeled into a delivery room about 12:15 p.m. and within minutes the first-time mother had delivered via C-section with Federline by her side.

Spears experienced early labour contractions on Sept. 9 and then spent the next several days in much physical discomfort. “Pregnancy has not agreed with her,” a Spears pal said. “She has been sick a lot.... She couldn’t get out of bed all weekend.”

And what makes this story ALMOST totally useless, you ask?

The poor kid will be known as PMS for the rest of his life.

Now that is entertainment.

Posted by The Skipper     on 09/15/2005 at 01:47 PM   
Filed Under: • Celebrities •  
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ARRRRRH!

In case you forgot to mark your calendars, you scurvy bilge-rats take note: Monday is Talk Like A Pirate Day, laddies! Shiver me timbers! ARRRRHH!

Posted by The Skipper     on 09/15/2005 at 12:56 PM   
Filed Under: • Humor •  
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Pied Piper, Call Your Office!

This story is rather disturbing.

Plague-Infected Mice Missing From N.J. Lab

Sept. 15, 2005 — The FBI and Centers for Disease Control and Prevention are investigating the disappearance from a New Jersey research lab of at least three mice carrying a deadly strain of plague.

The rodents have been missing for two weeks.

Two weeks!  In New Jersey?????  There’s probably 100,000 infected little buggers out there now.

Posted by Drew458     on 09/15/2005 at 11:51 AM   
Filed Under: • News-Briefs •  
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They Cair What You See

What happens if a woman shows up for a CAIR photo-op without a hijab? No problem! They’ll just Photoshop one on!

(via Jihadwatch)

Posted by Drew458     on 09/15/2005 at 10:19 AM   
Filed Under: • RoPMA •  
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Two Thumbs Up

• U.S. SENATOR ARLEN SPECTER (R-PA), CHAIRMAN
• U.S. SENATOR PATRICK J. LEAHY (D-VT), RANKING MEMBER
• U.S. SENATOR CHARLES E. SCHUMER (D-NY)
• JUDGE JOHN ROBERTS, NOMINATED TO BE CHIEF JUSTICE OF THE UNITED STATES

SCHUMER: Let me just say, sir, in all due respect—and I respect your intelligence and your career and your family—this process is getting a little more absurd the further we move. You agree we should be finding out your philosophy and method of legal reasoning, modesty, stability, but when we try to find out what modesty and stability mean, what your philosophy means, we don’t get any answers. It’s as if I asked you: What kind of movies do you like? Tell me two or three good movies. And you say, “I like movies with good acting. I like movies with good directing. I like movies with good cinematography.”

And I ask you, “No, give me an example of a good movie.” You don’t name one. I say, “Give me an example of a bad movie.”

SCHUMER: You won’t name one. Then I ask you if you like “Casablanca,” and you respond by saying, “Lots of people like ‘Casablanca.’”

(LAUGHTER)

You tell me it’s widely settled that “Casablanca” is one of the great movies.

SPECTER: Senator Schumer, now that your time is over, are you asking him a question?

SCHUMER: Yes.

(LAUGHTER)

I am saying, sir—I am making a plea here. I hope we’re going to continue this for a while, that within the confines of what you think is appropriate and proper, you try to be a little more forthcoming with us in terms of trying to figure out what kind of justice you will become.

SPECTER: We will now take a 15-minute break, reconvene at 4:25.

ROBERTS: Mr. Chairman, could I address some of the…

SPECTER: Oh, absolutely. Absolutely. I didn’t hear any question, Judge Roberts…

ROBERTS: Well, there were several along the way.

(CROSSTALK)

LEAHY: ... want to break anyway. You go right ahead.

ROBERTS: I’ll be very succinct.

SPECTER: You are privileged to comment.

This is coming out of his next round, if there is one.

(LAUGHTER)

SCHUMER: I guess there’ll be.

ROBERTS: First, “Dr. Zhivago” and “North by Northwest.”

(LAUGHTER)

SCHUMER: Now, how about on the more important subject of what…

(CROSSTALK)

SPECTER: Let him finish his answer. You’re out of time.

(LAUGHTER)

SCHUMER: Not out of movies.

ROBERTS: The only point I would like to make, because you raised the question how is this different than justices who dissent and criticize, and how is this different than professors—and I think there are significant differences. The justice who files a dissent is issuing an opinion based upon his participation in the judicial process. He confronted the case with an open mind. He heard the arguments. He fully and fairly considered the briefs. He consulted with his colleagues, went through the process of issuing an opinion. And in my experience, every one of those stages can cause you to change your view.

The view you ask then of me, “Well, what do you think, is it correct or not?” or “How would you come out?” That’s not a result of that process. And that’s why I shouldn’t respond to those types of questions. Now, the professor, how is that different? That professor is not sitting here as a nominee before the court. And the great danger, of course, that I believe every one of the justices has been vigilant to safeguard against is turning this into a bargaining process. It is not a process under which senators get to say, “I want you to rule this way, this way and this way. And if you tell me you’ll rule this way, this way and this way, I’ll vote for you.”

That’s not a bargaining process. Judges are not politicians. They cannot promise to do certain things in exchange for votes. And if you go back and look at the transcripts, Senator, I would just respectfully disagree. I think I have been more forthcoming than any of the other nominees. Other nominees have not been willing to tell you whether they thought Marbury v. Madison was correctly decided. They took a very strict approach.

I have taken what I think is a more pragmatic approach and said, if I don’t think that’s likely to come before the court, I will comment on it. And, again, perhaps that’s subject to criticism, because it is difficult to draw the line sometimes. But I wanted to be able to share as much as I can with the committee in response to the concerns you and others have expressed, and so I have adopted that approach.

Posted by The Skipper     on 09/15/2005 at 09:43 AM   
Filed Under: • Judges-Courts-Lawyers • Politics •  
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The Three Wise Guys From Jersey

The following is why the Bible should be rated PG-13. No one under the age of 13 should be allowed to read it without an accompanying adult or guardian. This comes from a Catholic Elementary School where students were asked questions about the Old and New Testament. Here is what the little tikes understood about God, the Bible and everything ....

1. IN THE FIRST BOOK OF THE BIBLE, GUINESSIS. GOD GOT TIRED OF CREATING THE WORLD SO HE TOOK THE SABBATH OFF.

2. ADAM AND EVE WERE CREATED FROM AN APPLE TREE. NOAH’S WIFE WAS JOAN OF ARK. NOAH BUILT AND ARK AND THE ANIMALS CAME ON IN PEARS.

3. LOTS WIFE WAS A PILLAR OF SALT DURING THE DAY, BUT A BALL OF FIRE DURING THE NIGHT.

4. THE JEWS WERE A PROUD PEOPLE AND THROUGHOUT HISTORY THEY HAD TROUBLE WITH UNSYMPATHETIC GENITALS.

5. SAMPSON WAS A STRONGMAN WHO LET HIMSELF BE LED ASTRAY BY A JEZEBEL LIKE DELILAH.

6. SAMSON SLAYED THE PHILISTINES WITH THE AXE OF THE APOSTLES.

7. MOSES LED THE JEWS TO THE RED SEA WHERE THEY MADE UNLEAVENED BREAD WHICH IS BREAD WITHOUT ANY INGREDIENTS.

8, THE EGYPTIANS WERE ALL DROWNED IN THE DESSERT. AFTERWARDS, MOSES WENT UP TO MOUNT CYANIDE TO GET THE TEN COMMANDMENTS.

9. THE FIRST COMMANDMENTS WAS WHEN EVE TOLD ADAM TO EAT THE APPLE.

10. THE SEVENTH COMMANDMENT IS THOU SHALT NOT ADMIT ADULTERY.

11. MOSES DIED BEFORE HE EVER REACHED CANADA. THEN JOSHUA LED THE HEBREWS IN THE BATTLE OF GERITOL.

12. THE GREATEST MIRICLE IN THE BIBLE IS WHEN JOSHUA TOLD HIS SON TO STAND STILL AND HE OBEYED HIM.

13. DAVID WAS A HEBREW KING WHO WAS SKILLED AT PLAYING THE LIAR. HE FOUGHT THE FINKELSTEINS, A RACE OF PEOPLE WHO LIVED IN BIBLICAL TIMES.

14. SOLOMON, ONE OF DAVIDS SONS, HAD 300 WIVES AND 700 PORCUPINES.

15. WHEN MARY HEARD SHE WAS THE MOTHER OF JESUS, SHE SANG THE MAGNA CARTA.

16. WHEN THE THREE WISE GUYS FROM THE EAST SIDE ARRIVED THEY FOUND JESUS IN THE MANAGER.

17. JESUS WAS BORN BECAUSE MARY HAD AN IMMACULATE CONTRAPTION.

18. ST. JOHN THE BLACKSMITH DUMPED WATER ON HIS HEAD.

19. JESUS ENUNCIATED THE GOLDEN RULE, WHICH SAYS TO DO UNTO OTHERS BEFORE THEY DO ONE TO YOU. HE ALSO EXPLAINED A MAN DOTH NOT LIVE BY SWEAT ALONE.

20. IT WAS A MIRICLE WHEN JESUS ROSE FROM THE DEAD AND MANAGED TO GET THE TOMBSTONE OFF THE ENTRANCE.

21. THE PEOPLE WHO FOLLOWED THE LORD WERE CALLED THE 12 DECIBELS.

22. THE EPISTELS WERE THE WIVES OF THE APOSTLES.

23. ONE OF THE OPPOSSUMS WAS ST. MATTHEW WHO WAS ALSO A TAXIMAN.

24. ST. PAUL CAVORTED TO CHRISTIANITY, HE PREACHED HOLY ACRIMONY WHICH IS ANOTHER NAME FOR MARRAIGE.

25. CHRISTIANS HAVE ONLY ONE SPOUSE. THIS IS CALLED MONOTONY.

Posted by The Skipper     on 09/15/2005 at 08:56 AM   
Filed Under: • Humor •  
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Ticklish Evidence?

Lafave’s Attorney Tries To Block Photos
Detectives took intimate photographs of the ex-teacher accused of sex with a student
(ST PETERSBURG TIMES)

Everybody knows about Debra Lafave. They know about her alleged trysts with a 14-year-old student. They even know what she was wearing that day in the portable classroom. But few know about the graphic photos police took of the former Greco Middle School teacher. On Tuesday, Lafave’s attorney filed a motion to block public access to six photos taken of her last year, saying officers violated Lafave’s constitutional right to privacy when they shot close-ups of her genitals.

Hillsborough Circuit Judge Wayne S. Timmerman is scheduled to hear the motion next week. “We don’t believe that the search warrant issued by the judge authorized them to do this,” said John Fitzgibbons, Lafave’s attorney. “At this point, anybody could literally go into the State Attorney’s Office, get copies of these photographs, put them on the Internet, and the world would have access to them.”

There’s been no shortage of public interest in Lafave’s case since she was arrested in front of her former student’s Temple Terrace home on June 21, 2004. The teenage boy told police he had sex with Lafave, 25, on three occasions. Questioned by detectives a week before Lafave’s arrest on charges of lewd and lascivious battery, the boy told them things about his teacher that only intimate contact would have revealed. He mentioned belly button rings and butterfly tattoos. Then he told them about Lafave’s “V” shaped tan line along her waist and that she had shaved her pubic area in a “unique” pattern.

Hillsborough Circuit Judge Michelle Sisco issued a search warrant last year authorizing Temple Terrace investigators to collect evidence that would verify the victim’s account. When detectives brought Lafave to the county jail, they told her they had a warrant to photograph her body, according to the motion filed Tuesday. A nurse draped a sheet over Lafave and a female jailhouse deputy snapped four pictures of her hips, legs and back. Then they placed Lafave’s feet in stirrups and took two close-up photos of her genitals that Fitzgibbons described as “pornographic.”

When they tried to take pictures of Lafave’s breasts, she refused, Fitzgibbons said. “They didn’t need to do it this way,” he said. “It’s just outrageous.” Under Florida’s public records laws, any citizen can request access to the Lafave photos. Assistant State Attorney Michael Sinacore pointed out that there have been other Hillsborough cases where alleged sex offenders’ genitals were photographed. “If it’s necessary to prove the case beyond a reasonable doubt to show graphic photographs, it’s the state’s job to produce the photographs and the jury’s job to view them,” Sinacore said.

Allison Taylor, executive director of the Council on Sex Offender Treatment, an independent Texas state agency that manages convicted sex offenders, said the practice may seem invasive but so is the practice of photographing victims’ genitals to corroborate their accounts. Taylor said she doubts the issue would get as much attention if Lafave were less attractive or if the accused offender was a man.

“If you turned the table and it was a good looking male and that was done to a little girl, the scenario is he would have been crucified,” Taylor said. Temple Terrace police spokeswoman Paula MacDonald declined to comment on the photos of Lafave, saying the case is now in the hands of the State Attorney’s Office.

Posted by The Skipper     on 09/15/2005 at 07:01 AM   
Filed Under: • Crime •  
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You’ve Got Mail!

On top of all that spam dropping into your e-mail Inbox this week you could soon be getting e-mail messages from .... your car ....

OnStar’s Newest System Delivers Mail From Your Car
(USA TODAY)

In its quest to make cars more like futuristic computer Hal 9000, OnStar, General Motors’ in-car telecommunications system, now will give owners e-mail updates from their vehicles reporting problems or reminding about maintenance needs, officials said Tuesday. OnStar officials promise that, unlike the famous computer from the movie 2001: A Space Odyssey, the diagnostics e-mail won’t complain if drivers choose to ignore its advice. Nor will ignoring the e-mail risk voiding the warranty. Rather, the e-mails are another way for OnStar to get in touch with its subscribers, and, officials hope, persuade them to keep the service.

A study by J.D. Power and Associates found that consumers would pay $200 a year for a service that could tell them how their car is performing. OnStar is offering it for free for a year. The service will tell car owners how long they have until they need to change the oil, whether the air bags are working, how the anti-lock braking system is operating and when the car is due for maintenance. It detects whether a car needs an oil change through a computer system that judges how the engine is working.

It will work on any OnStar-equipped vehicle from the 2004 model year on. OnStar will be standard equipment on all GM cars and trucks by the end of 2007. Customers with OnStar-equipped vehicles get one free year of service, and then pay $17 a month for a basic safety subscription and $35 for a plan that enables drivers to ask for directions or make restaurant reservations.

OnStar is a satellite connection between a vehicle and a center in Detroit that can monitor such information as where a car is or whether air bags have deployed. Customers can get doors unlocked remotely or directions to the nearest gas station. Currently, fewer than 70% of customers sign up to pay for the service. OnStar would like to increase that number. It hopes added features will do that.

Posted by The Skipper     on 09/15/2005 at 06:47 AM   
Filed Under: • Science-Technology •  
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Most Ridiculous Item Of The Day (So Far)

Police Extract Stolen Mobile Phone From Woman’s Posterior
(THE REGISTER)

Just what is it about Romanian women and mobile phones? Back in April, there was the case of 34-year-old Ruxandra Gardian who attempted to make good her escape with a phone concealed in her vagina. Unfortunately for her, quick-thinking cops simply rang the thing and the game was up. We suggested at the time that perhaps turning it off was a good plan, but as several readers pointed out, that would have then required the PIN to reactivate the phone.

Fair enough, put it on vibrate then. Forget it, suggested several female readers, for obvious reasons. So, what’s the solution? We honestly don’t know, but we do know that sticking a (k)nicked mobile where the sun really doesn’t shine is not it. And here’s why:

Petronela Brandus, 24, has become the latest “body cavity phone blagger” to have her collar felt after police stopped the suspected thief as she got off a bus in Iasi. Passengers had apparently seen the 24-year-old lift the device, but cops could find no trace of it. In the time-honoured fashion, they then rang the number and heard the tell-tale sound of internal phone action. In this case, however, Brandus had not gone for the relatively-simple vaginal option, but rather the less convenient back passage route.

It did her no good. Back at the station, a strip search quickly retrieved the offending item. Officer Madalin Taranu told local daily 7 Plus: “We’ve had people hiding things in their bras and knickers before, but this was a new one.”

One question remains: what then happened to the phone? In contrast to the case of Ruxandra Gardian - and indeed that of the Jamaican fellow mobile-tamponer who started this intimate criminal trend - its owner subsequently accepted it back.

Officer Taranu explained: “The station doctor extracted the phone and we sprayed it with disinfectant.” We should hope so too.

Posted by The Skipper     on 09/15/2005 at 06:25 AM   
Filed Under: • Crime •  
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Life Lesson

Life Lesson For Guys #146: When your pregnant wife demands pickles and ice cream or watermelon pizza, don’t ask questions - just give her whatever she wants, OK? You can thank us for the advice later. If you try to argue with her, this could happen ....

Pregnant Woman Accused of Stabbing Boyfriend
(SAN FRANCISCO CHRONICLE)

A 27-year-old pregnant San Mateo County woman is in jail accused of stabbing her boyfriend with a kitchen knife after the couple argued about her nutritional choices, authorities said. The 18-year-old boyfriend, whom police have not identified, is being treated at a local hospital for stab wounds to his right lung and liver, said San Mateo County Deputy District Attorney Christine Ford. He is expected to recover and be released from the hospital sometime in the next couple of days, she said.

Maria Islas pleaded not guilty on Tuesday in Redwood City to one charge each of attempted murder, assault with a deadly weapon and domestic violence, Ford said. Each includes an added special circumstance of personally inflicting great bodily injury and weapon use, Ford said. The most serious charge, attempted murder, carries a maximum sentence of 15 years in prison, Ford said.

According to Ford, the incident occurred in the middle of the afternoon of Sept. 8 in the home the couple shares in unincorporated San Mateo County near Menlo Park. “There was an argument over her nutritional habits and how they impinged on the health of the pregnancy,” Ford said. Islas is three months pregnant by her boyfriend of several years. Islas allegedly grabbed a serrated kitchen knife and stabbed the 18-year-old boyfriend in the abdomen.

At the man’s request, Islas called 911 and later was arrested by San Mateo County sheriffs. Islas is being held in jail without bail, Ford said. Her attorney, Eric Liberman, said he didn’t want to comment on the case because he was newly appointed to it and just met his client on Tuesday. Islas will return to court Oct. 3, at which time a preliminary hearing will be scheduled, Ford said.

Posted by The Skipper     on 09/15/2005 at 05:56 AM   
Filed Under: • Stoopid-People •  
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King Of The Hill

_{Patrick Chappatte, Geneva Le Temps, Geneva, Switzerland}

Posted by The Skipper     on 09/15/2005 at 05:42 AM   
Filed Under: • Humor •  
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   Wednesday - September 14, 2005

Donk Blame Game

Posted by The Skipper     on 09/14/2005 at 08:19 PM   
Filed Under: • Democrats-Liberals-Moonbat Leftists •  
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Not that very many people ever read this far down, but this blog was the creation of Allan Kelly and his friend Vilmar. Vilmar moved on to his own blog some time ago, and Allan ran this place alone until his sudden and unexpected death partway through 2006. We all miss him. A lot. Even though he is gone this site will always still be more than a little bit his. We who are left to carry on the BMEWS tradition owe him a great debt of gratitude, and we hope to be able to pay that back by following his last advice to us all:

1. Keep a firm grasp of Right and Wrong
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It's been a long strange trip without you Skipper, but thanks for pointing us in the right direction and giving us a swift kick in the behind to get us going. Keep lookin' down on us, will ya? Thanks.

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