Prances With Wolves
Perfect.
NEW WEEK—NEW RESOLUTIONS
1. I will read The Entire Topic before I try to get my oar in.
(except sci-fi contests, when I know the answer & Cheese-Nips is logged in)2. I will read OTHERS’ COMMENTS before I try to get my oar in.
(with the obvious exception of OCM’s)Posted by Oink
02/19/2006 at 07:07 AM
HA! Let’s see how long that lasts.
I heard that.
You ain’t heard nothin’ yet!
********************************************I do not ALWAYS have to be a Wise--
(except when it’s really, really funny!)
(I crack myself up sometimes!)
Posted by Oink
02/19/2006 at 07:30 AM
Quoth The Oink:
“I do not ALWAYS have to be a Wise-- ”Everyone please take note of that statement. Let’s see how long he can remain pithy.
BWAH-HAH-HAH-HA-HA-HA-HA- ...
Lessee here ... these rules/resolutions are starting to require numbers
1. Read topic
2. Read comments
3. Moderation in wise-assAND
4. It is unnecessary to always demonstrate one’s superior knowledge and intelligence.
Give other members credit for being able to figure out obvious things on their own.
(this is technically a violation of rule #3, but necessary to emphasize the point)Posted by Oink
02/19/2006 at 09:12 AM
Oh, geeze, and I thought the pressure was on to be a wise-
I guess I can relax.
Lets see how long this thread can go on before someoen posts On Topic.
[Now I’m itching to make a derogatory comment about the poor parody]
Topic? Oink kidnapped the topic seven comments ago. He is holding it for ransom and will return it (unharmed) for a to-be-named-later sum. The FBI has a wiretap on The Skipper’s phone for when Oink calls with his demands. Developing ...
(his demand that attention be paid to his cause having been met, OINK releases the hostage Topic unharmed)
Posted by Oink
02/19/2006 at 09:31 AM
The Three Laws Of Oink-botics:
(from the novel ”I, Oinkbot” by Skipper Heinlein)1. An Oink may not kidnap a post topic or through lack of reading a post allow it to be kidnapped.
2. An Oink must read the comments of others before commenting unless such comments conflict with the First Law.
3. An Oink must protect its own wise-
satire, as long as such wise- satire does not conflict with the First or Second Law.
AND, ** adapted I believe from “Robots of Dawn"(?) the ZERO-ETH LAW:
The Skipper Is Always Right!
In cases where he is wrong, please refer to this rule.
** Following His lead into the underbrush which, by definition, must be The Topic.
Posted by Oink
02/19/2006 at 09:56 AM
HELP! I have a Wild Boar (bore?) following me!
THE TOPIC: Hollywood and its obsession with itself. Movies must have a message but no accuracy, honesty, plot, acting, story, music or entertainment value whatsoever.
Q.E.D. ! The Zeroeth Law!
J’ADOUBE! (in the game of chess “I adjust” said when a player touches a piece without intending to move it) *** Where I said The Skipper “is wrong” I intended to say “appears to be wrong”.
*** usually lying thru his teeth also…
Posted by Oink
02/19/2006 at 10:28 AM
"ALL COWBOYS ARE FAGS” sex pistols tshirt (cica) 1977
I never watch the Academy Awards anymore - nor follow *news* about them.
If I hear about such things...it is in passing, (or here) ha!In as far as *movies* that I watch , or TV programs...I rarely if ever watch spoonfed *tv* anymore....the exception being The Tonight Show with Jay Leno, and SNL occassionally - both of which are hold overs from my college days. Some things are like a warm blanket… and my viewing is dependant upon the *guest* featured.
I do enjoy A&E, Frontline,PBS,the History Channel, National Geographic Channel...and Speed Vision- since they always have great aviation programs on. I find I have very little patience anymore for *fluff* programming.
Now- ha! Sunday confession
Forgive me Skipper - for I find the OINK hilariously funny, with an acerbic wit, and interesting to boot !Forgive me Skipper - for more times than not I am *totally* confused when OCM makes a comment...ok?? I just don’t *git it* ha! and I will add ...I think OCM is kewl in many ways - but! dewd, I don’t think he likes me too much
ah k ....2 confessions is plenty.
Posted by SouthernDoll
02/19/2006 at 03:27 PM
I believe that the topic is crappy hollyweird movies that lack any substance, imagination or quality acting. If it isn’t a remake, apparently right now the only thing necessary is the message. Which is so out there and repetitive that why pay money to see it - just watch a network news show and save the money for a better computer!
Fair warning, Doll .... OCM is a “prevert” (he likes anything remotely resembling the female of just about any species) and OINK is a “catamite” (according to his profile - go look that up). Take care, little one. You are consorting with mangy beasts there.
I don’t know what it is about me, but if I could bottle it and sell it ...$$$$$$$$$$$
Seriously, thanks, Doll!
Posted by Oink
02/19/2006 at 05:33 PM
Skipper! aye, aye Sir ha!
I know what a *catamite* is....ew ew ew
*Consorting* ??!!??? ha! now, I know cats can contract mange...but, can piggies?
But! rest assured...i have taken note of your advice
Oink! perhaps....something along the lines of Piglette Eu De Toilette perfume...err...for females , but of course!
Marketing? Ebay Auctions, but of course...ANYTHING seems to sell there
I will have to ponder the masculine version of the fragrance...ha!
Posted by SouthernDoll
02/19/2006 at 09:22 PM
Doll: Marketing campaign, endorsements, all done. Technicals problems: The stuff only works when it’s on me.
Posted by Oink
02/19/2006 at 10:20 PM
I was the manager of many of those Bally Health Clubs in metro Denver. Back when they were called Holiday. When I would get in trouble my boss would send me to the GAY club in Cherry Creek for 2 months. I only got in trouble enough one time and that was one time too many. I can assure you when the homos out number the normal people the homos can get really mean spirited.
The Colorado mountains are full of queer cowboys. OCM lives there.
Usually the QueerCowboys say, “Hi-ho Silver,” alot.
Posted by Z Woof
02/20/2006 at 08:07 AM
The Colorado mountains are full of queer cowboys. OCM lives there.
I’m sure that these two “facts” have no relation to each other. OCM only bothers with female livestock.
Hey, I stuck up for ewe, OCM. Don’t forget it.
For you science buffs—chemical composition of Woof’s Queer Cowboy Elixir: HIOAg.
Posted by Oink
02/20/2006 at 10:04 AM
Oink! and the male version of the *scent* is called??
i was thinking ...perhaps...PORCINE Z-28, marketed correctly, you *don’t have to tell* them before they buy it that it only works on you! geesh!
and that photo- marvelous! I think it should be displayed prominently on the bottle, farm chicks seem to turn guys on, what a seller! but!! she must be holding a bottle of the magic potion, a sure sale, *fer* sure
and then, wow!! i just got another great idea....you can buy ad space HERE on BMEWS!!
as for woofs...a name comes to mind for his Elixir- *Mangee*, a nice oriental flair with a twist of Ang Lee, circa *brokeback* fame. ha! i envision a green bottle, with embossed bamboo shoots and maybe a panda bear, or 2, in a compromising position, but of course.
Posted by SouthernDoll
02/20/2006 at 09:39 PM
Doll: Down South we’re gonna call it ”Eau de Pork Rinds”.
Classier places?? ”Eau de Peau de Cochon” !!??
Posted by Oink
02/20/2006 at 10:02 PM
Doll: What did you mean with this message you emailed me
[censored in the interests of public safety]
...come clean now Doll…
Posted by Z Woof
02/21/2006 at 10:01 AM
Oink! ha! the Eau de Pork Rinds will be a best seller ha!
Z Woof: if you refer to the above comment, what I mean should be pretty clear to you.
If,indeed you are insinuating that I *emailed* you? I will say simply this-
stop confabulating. I am disappointed in you. Personally, I don’t come to this blog for this kind of bull.In as far as your comment directed specifically towards me on another comment thread? I found it rude, in poor taste, sophmoric, indeed- less than honorable.
is wrong with you?
Is that coming “clean enough for you”.?
Now, please drive through, before 10 kinds of hell fly into me.
I am done with this drivel.
Posted by SouthernDoll
02/21/2006 at 02:00 PM
Doll: The French and English versions are close to the same thing.
ZW: This’d be a good time to lay low.
Posted by Oink
02/21/2006 at 02:28 PM
oink: I have never seen a censor for public safety before.
We are in a time of transition.
Doll: Ok I believe you are a girl now. A homo wouldn’t have said those girl things you did. Usually girls don’t call themselves EroticDoll then get offended so easily. So you must be a fine girl. You got to expect some questions with a name like that.
Is that your real photo? Is that photo from 1994?
Posted by Z Woof
02/21/2006 at 02:45 PM
ZW: You’re one of us, my companion & equal, and not to be treated like some troll.
I’m giving you some avuncular advice from the Old Man to dial it down a tad. Take it out on OCM.
Posted by Oink
02/21/2006 at 03:33 PM
oink: I have agreed that Doll is a fine girl.
Like my Grandpa used to say, “Trust the hogs.”
Posted by Z Woof
02/21/2006 at 04:40 PM
Doll: When you come to this blog we are bound to give you the entertainment that you seek? That would make us very similiar to a juke box where you put in a quarter and we all dance for you. That isn’t the old rules here.
But, I have forgiven you because you’re a girl. I think, I hope.
You didn’t say what year your photo on your avatar was taken.
Doll: How tall are you and what is your weight?
Posted by Z Woof
02/21/2006 at 04:50 PM
Admirable, ZW, thank you.
Women may achieve all the other equality, but I doubt they’ll ever equal our (average) size and strength. Most of violent problems in every civilization is caused by unsocialized young males; whether it’s the boy’s in the 1848 miners’ camp or the boys ‘n the hood. That’s ONE big reason why males learning & practicing courtesy is so important.
Good show!
Posted by Oink
02/21/2006 at 04:54 PM
You’re welcome oink. I saw the name of this thread and thought I owned it. You are correct that boys tease girls. Today the teachers stop the boys from playing dodge ball or tag and the boys get bored so they just put them on ritland and the suicides skyrocket. It was Donna Shalala, Janet Reno and Hillary that are causing ALL the problems in this civilization. Corporate Socialized Medicine indeed. Pure Medical Facism when the government bonds with industry and turn free citizens into slaves just so employer-based insurance companies can make a greedy dollar.
President Bush said employer based insurance is not portable so people can’t retire. We already have 3.3% unemployment in Tampa Bay. Florida has the largest surplus too. Soon Gov Jeb will have to make people work that don’t want to work. The HSA eliminates the advantage of large employers over small. This upgrades the American economy. Small employers hire 80% of all new hires in the economy. I think what Doll was sayin’ in her emails was that the HSA is the doorway to the 21st Century Financial Service Sector and a cornerstone of President Bush’s Ownership Society.
Doll probably doesn’t like us talking about the centerpiece of President Bush’s 2006 Domestic Agenda, the tax free HSA. Why? Simple, girls can’t understand taxes or politics.
Posted by Z Woof
02/21/2006 at 06:59 PM
ZW:
It is blatantly obvious that you were potty trained at gunpoint, and under extreme duress.
You are fixated on me for some reason?
But, i am SO totally not interested in this silliness. Please, give it a break.
I will ask you this....why is it that you have a constant need to personally attack me?
You have a negative,critical spirit. It does not interest me.
This type of behavior ended in 2nd grade for me....when Chris Fenton used to pull my blonde pigtails on the bus every day...to school and back home again at the end of the day. He was also a school yard bully.
I know in my heart that I have done absolutely NOTHING to deserve such behavior from you-indeed...i have given you the benefit of the doubt- however, I am not one of those girls who will take your whacking off with a little nudge and a wink and say...oh! he’s just being funny. Please, just do not even direct any comment towards me unless you can be civil. Thank you kindly.
Posted by SouthernDoll
02/21/2006 at 07:16 PM
EroticDoll: You’re a hoot. I say I have forgiven you and you say my spirit is negative and critical and throw me in with the likes of this so-called Chris Fenton. Then you continue on me and say I was potty trained at gun point. Notice how all these really mean things that you say are “Statements” and I simple asked you,"How tall are you and what is your weight?” You say this question is “ABUSIVE", but you are wrong, sorry.
I ran 6 Richard Simmons “FAT FARMS” in metro Denver with 30,000 overweight female members and 350 employees. I know way to much about fat women. You don’t have to tell me how much your weight is because I have a special handle on these type of things. After analyzin’ everything you have said, your avatar and your side-steppin’ the Height/Weight question, I guess you are 5’4” tall and 210lbs. These kind of women really like to throw their weight around and tell people how to act and censor their speech. If I called you OBESE, you would say, “That’s abusive.” It’s not me callin’ you OBESE EroticDoll, it’s the U.S. Surgeon General, grow up.
OCM: If this thread was called “Prancin’ with smelly old cats” then I would be nice to you. You know that. Just because fat women like EroticDoll also like free medications, just like you even though you’re rich now, I wouldn’t count on her help with you’re crazy liberal agenda. I bet even over-weight EroticDoll didn’t vote for that slime bag John Kerry, like you did. You’re still on your own OCM.
JB said, “Some people say there’s a woman to blame...but I know, It’s all womens’ fault.”
Posted by Z Woof
02/22/2006 at 06:01 AM
OK, gang! That’s enough. No personal attacks, OK? Move on to another post or I will be forced to close this discussion thread.
EroticDoll and Z-Woof, retire to neutral corners and take a mandatory 10-count to cool down. Now stop this silliness. Both of you.
02/19/2006 at 02:20 PM
