BMEWS
 
Death once had a near-Sarah Palin experience.

calendar   Tuesday - January 28, 2020

Nobody noticed the smell?

30 years of turtle poop in the house and nobody noticed the smell. Nor did anybody clean the place up at all in all that time? Seriously???

I Guess I’m Not Such A Bad Housekeeper After All

A family in Realengo, Brazil, found their long lost pet tortoise after they decided to finally clean out the house. Back in 1982, the Almeida Family was saddened to learn that their red-footed tortoise, Manuela, had gone missing.

Their house was being renovated at the time, so the family assumed that the tortoise had slipped out through a door left open by the construction crew—disappearing into the forest near their home.

But they couldn’t have been more wrong. The true fate of their lost pet remained a mystery for the next 30 years, until the father passed away and the Almeida children returned to help clean out his cluttered storage room.

It turns out, the father was somewhat of a hoarder, so the room was jam-packed with things.

While cleaning out the house, a neighbor asked son Leandro if he was intending to get rid of the tortoise, too.

“I put the trash bag on the floor and the neighbor just warned me ‘are you going to throw the turtle away too?’ At that moment, I went white and didn’t believe it,” Leandro told Globo TV.

That’s when the Almeidas learned that Manuela had managed to survive for three decades on her own.

The family suspects she survived on termites which, thanks to all that unwanted furniture, were likely in abundance.

Aye Yai Yaaiii, we found Mr. Turtle!! He was in the living room this whole time, since we were little kids!!!

Are termites juicy? Don’t turtles need a drink of water now and again?

PS - Think this one through a bit. Since the turtle was there the whole time, the implication is that as soon as the renovation was complete the house was hoardered up with junk immediately. Otherwise, wouldn’t the turtle be noticed in the nice new rooms?


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Posted by Drew458   United States  on 01/28/2020 at 08:20 AM   
Filed Under: • AnimalsFun-StuffStoopid-People •  
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calendar   Tuesday - December 31, 2019

Happy 2020

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Posted by Drew458   United States  on 12/31/2019 at 10:59 AM   
Filed Under: • Fun-Stuff •  
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calendar   Saturday - December 21, 2019

Free Copy Still Available

Stilton Jarlsberg, that totally cheesy comic writer, has put together a few hundred of the early Johnny Optimism strips in a little book. You can buy the paper edition on Amazon for real cheap, something like $5.99, or - for a limited time only - you can get the Kindle version for free.

Johnny has a tough life, a 12 year old kid suffering from just about every ailment known to medical science. He pretty much lives at the hospital with his emotional support dog Lance, dealing with the whacky staff, the doctors, nurses, the cleaning folks, etc. Plus all the other patients on the kid’s ward who have even stranger diseases than he does. It’s dark comedy, but like Stilton says, “What doesn’t kill you makes you stranger”. Oh, and lots of wretched puns. I love it.

Johnny Optimism is a darkly comic look at a wheelchair-bound boy who lives in a very strange hospital, and his unending effort to look on the bright side because “things could always get worse.” And they do get worse, time after time. Johnny interacts with a highly unusual collection of medical professionals, bureaucrats, strange kids, fellow sufferers, a manic helper monkey, a creepy clown and more - getting real comfort only from his faithful dog, Lance. Together they’re trying to cope with Life...just like the rest of us.

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Posted by Drew458   United States  on 12/21/2019 at 11:29 PM   
Filed Under: • Fun-Stuff •  
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calendar   Sunday - July 31, 2016

awww

Sometimes the internet gives you the greatest pictures ...

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Young Prince George had his 3rd birthday July 22

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Animal sensitive types are aghast that he fed his dog a bit of ice cream. A little ice cream never was a problem for our Welshie was I was a boy, and it seems this Welshie is doing OK with it too.

See More Below The Fold

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Posted by Drew458   United States  on 07/31/2016 at 10:04 AM   
Filed Under: • Fun-Stuff •  
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calendar   Thursday - July 14, 2016

perfection

Gotta love the NY Post. Tell it like it is, much? En toto!  Here’s their article with the title that tells the whole story ...

Weenies burn flag to protest cops, get attacked by bikers, need cops to save their asses

A group of flag-burning anti-NYPD protesters needed New York’s Finest to save their skin from a gang of angry bikers who tried to pummel them in a Brooklyn park for setting Old Glory ablaze Wednesday.

The fiery stunt by a few dozen members of the group Disarm the Police led to a chaotic scene at about 8 p.m. in Fort Greene Park, when the activists enraged 40 members of the Hallowed Sons Motorcycle Club by roasting the flag on a tiny barbecue grill.

“They took off like little b—hes,” said one biker. “They lit the f–king flag and took off running once they got slapped once or twice.”

The anarchists had announced on social media that they had planned to burn the flag in protest of NYPD policies, drawing a large group of flag-waving counterprotesters, including the bikers.

...

While it’s illegal to openly burn anything in Fort Greene Park, the self-styled anarchists managed to find a loophole in the law that allows cooking in closed barbecue grills.

Thus, they started to roast the flag, but they didn’t burn it for long. One of the bikers rushed forward in a fit of rage and kicked over the grill, sending embers flying. He then doused it as members of the pro-flag crowd chanted “USA! USA!”

The bikers then started trying to rough up the protesters — who were quickly saved by members of the same police force that they criticize.

The protesters were shielded by the cops and escorted out of the park.

“I served in the Marines,” said counterprotester Brian Christopher, 23. “We defend this flag. We are ready to die for it. When I see people burning it and showing complete ignorance, it’s very offensive.”

What’s the foley effect that makes that comeuppance sound? Wat-wat-waat-waaaa

big_us_flag


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Posted by Drew458   United States  on 07/14/2016 at 11:18 PM   
Filed Under: • Fun-Stuff •  
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calendar   Saturday - June 18, 2016

Throwback Saturday

We haven’t had one of these in years and years, so take a look and take your guess. No fair running to image searching engines ...

Whatsit 2016

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While digging around in my mom’s basement, looking for a masonry drill bit of a certain size, I came across this most unusual hammer. My brother has the most eclectic tool collection ever. It’s a light little hammer with a slender handle about 10” long. One face is a straight sided cylinder about 9/16” across. Overall I’d say the head might weight 3 ounces. But what really makes it odd is that one of the hammer faces is a flat triangle. Odder still, that face rotates. Freely rotates. It’s on a little bearing with a set screw and everything.

A 4 ounce rotating hammer.  Maybe it’s for adjusting windmills while they’re running, creating all that wonderful alternate energy.

What on earth?


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Posted by Drew458   United States  on 06/18/2016 at 01:46 PM   
Filed Under: • Fun-Stuff •  
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calendar   Saturday - June 11, 2016

Once Upon A Time

Before Government Intervention:

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In 1962, the average octanes of gasolines in the U.S. now stood at 93 for regular, 99 for premium and 102 for the few super-premiums still left on the market. Those numbers would increase only slightly in the next few years to around 94 octane for regular, and 100 for premium by 1967.




After government intervention:

There are three types of gasoline grades generally available in the United States. Regular gas has an octane rating of 87. Plus or midgrade gasoline has an octane of 89 and premium has a 92 octane rating.








Although I must say, when I do get behind one of these restored 60’s cars in traffic, many lovingly brought back to better than mint condition, they stink. The stench of raw gasoline leaking out the exhausts and from every other point on their engines is enough to knock you dead.  I really do like the cleaner air, but did it have to come at such a cost?

See More Below The Fold

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Posted by Drew458   United States  on 06/11/2016 at 09:16 PM   
Filed Under: • Eye-CandyFun-StuffGovernment •  
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Man, this is some clucked up news

Judge Orders Reparations To Be Paid To Former Slaves

And wouldn’t you just know it? Not only is this from the UK not the USA, but the slaves in question are white boys. Lithuanians! Say whhaaat?

And they were kept in slave-like conditions, not bred and sold generationally. Nope, they were merely abused chicken catchers in Kent. Worked to shreds, heinous working conditions, dogs set on them, pay withheld, kept as indentures, etc. Modern slaves, so to speak.

Who even knew that chicken catching was a job, or that running a “gang” of them was a career path? Only in the UK! [ Drew imagines chicken gang members hangin in the barrio, colors up and flashin’ signs. Would that be giving people the bird? Eggsactly!]

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Lithuanian migrants trafficked to UK egg farms sue ‘worst gangmaster ever’

[ 2015 ]Six workers bringing legal action against Kent-based DJ Houghton describe working as chicken catchers in inhuman and degrading conditions

A group of Lithuanian migrants who were trafficked to work in farms producing eggs for high street brands are suing a Kent-based gangmaster operation and its directors, in the first case of a UK company being taken to court for claims relating to modern slavery.
...
the workers bringing the legal action have described inhuman and degrading conditions. They said they were driven to farms and factories around the UK to undertake back-to-back eight-hour shifts for days at a time.

They said they were the victims of violence, described the process of being debt-bonded on arrival, and spoke of their accommodation riddled with bedbugs and of becoming so hungry that they ate raw eggs. They have reported being denied sleep and toilet breaks, forcing them to urinate into bottles and defecate into carrier bags in their vehicle.
...
They also allege that their pay was repeatedly withheld, while Lithuanian supervisors working with the Houghtons abused and assaulted workers, intimidated them with fighting dogs and threatened them with instant eviction if they complained. Accommodation provided was dirty, overcrowded and unsafe and infested with bed bugs and fleas.

A Guardian investigation in 2012 revealed that the trafficked Lithuanians were working in supply chains producing premium free range eggs for McDonald’s, Tesco, Asda, M&S, and the Sainsbury’s Woodland brand. The farm sheds they cleared of chickens also produced eggs under the Freedom Food brand, and for Noble Foods, owner of the Happy Egg Company.

Noble Foods is the UK’s largest egg company and it and its chairman, Peter Dean, have been major donors to the Conservative party. The company helicopter has been lent on occasion to the prime minister, David Cameron, for election campaigning. Cameron promised earlier this month to tackle modern slavery in the UK.

It is notoriously hard for victims of trafficking to get justice.

[ must resist the urge to call this a chickenshit lawsuit. Must. Resist. MUST!! ]

[ 10 June 2016 ] Chicken catchers win claim against Maidstone gangmaster
Six men have won a legal case against a Kent gangmaster firm they claim trafficked them to the UK to work as chicken catchers.

The Lithuanian men said DJ Houghton Catching Services used a Lithuanian trafficker before exploiting them.

The firm lost its licence after police raids in 2012 and was branded “the worst UK gangmaster ever” by the Gangmasters Licensing Authority (GLA).

The amount of compensation due to the men will be assessed at a later date.

The judge found the company unlawfully withheld wages and failed to ensure the workers had adequate facilities to wash, rest, eat and drink.

He also found it paid the men for the number of chickens caught rather than for the time worked and spent travelling.

The men claimed they had to travel for up to seven hours before being put to work in filthy conditions without proper equipment or clothing.

They also said they threatened and abused by supervisors with dogs.

Lawyers for the Lithuanian men said the case was the first time the High Court had ruled in favour of victims of trafficking against a British company.

“It...should be seen as a warning to British companies that they must eradicate all forms of modern slavery from their businesses, whether in the UK or elsewhere,” said Leigh Day partner Shanta Martin.

Someday Peiper will return and cover all this UK excitement for us.  No new word on his recovery, although he did have a birthday last month. I doubt that it was a very happy one. Poor old chumley.


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Posted by Drew458   United States  on 06/11/2016 at 07:58 PM   
Filed Under: • Fun-StuffUK •  
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calendar   Saturday - May 07, 2016

Saturday Morning Kid

Another wet and soggy cold morning. Damn me, I had to get the parka back out of the closet.

Even though the flowers are blooming and the world is greening up, it still barely feels like Spring. I wish I could kick start it somehow.

Here, this might help you kick start your morning. It almost did for me.

Not enough? Fine. Grab another cuppa coffee real quick and I’ll queue up few toe tappers for you below the fold. Toes nothing; it’s dancing time.

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Posted by Drew458   United States  on 05/07/2016 at 06:46 AM   
Filed Under: • Fun-StuffMusicRoPMA •  
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calendar   Sunday - April 17, 2016

Turtler’s Game Corner: UFO Alien Invasion

After about half a month of preparing for moving, working on a few odd jobs, and getting school in order, I can finally come back and hack out a post on here. Well, thanks for holding down the fort Drew. Life has kind of been a bugger for me lately, though I should be thankful it is still better than many. Please keep your prayers and thoughts with Peiper and his wife.

I know there are dozens of things happening in the wider world for me to talk about, but right now it’s the start of a new week and I just want to catch my breath, kick back, and Relaaaax! So when I sat down I realized I wanted to make a post about something I enjoy doing in my off time, and which some of you might be able to enjoy doing as well. But which is still at least a little bit topical to the hell-in-a-handbasket way of the real world.

So without Further ado, allow me to present you with....

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EXPLOSIONS!!!!!


Ok, more specifically the explosions- and everything else- in a little thing called UFO: Alien Invasion. Some of you might have heard of it before, some of you might have played it before. But I figure that there are probably at least a few other videogamers out here who would enjoy it, and that in a time like this at least a few people who aren’t that would be able to appreciate it..

I figure the best way to introduce it would be to give a

It is the year 2084. You control a secret organisation charged with defending Earth from a brutal alien enemy. Build up your bases, prepare your team, and dive head-first into the fast and flowing turn-based combat.

UFO: Alien Invasion is a squad-based tactical strategy game in the tradition of the old X-COM PC games, but with a twist. Our game combines military realism with hard science-fiction and the weirdness of an alien invasion. The carefully constructed turn-based system gives you pin-point control of your squad while maintaining a sense of pace and danger.

Over the long term you will need to conduct research into the alien threat to figure out their mysterious goals and use their powerful weapons for your own ends. You will produce unique items and use them in combat against your enemies. If you like, you can even use them against your friends with our multiplayer functionality.

UFO: Alien Invasion. Endless hours of gameplay — absolutely free.


Yeah, you read that right… UFO: Alien Invasion is ABSOLUTELY FREE. It costs exactly NO MONIES. NADA. GOOSE EGG. You can (and I’d suggest should) download it from here: http://ufoai.org/wiki/Download

I’d probably have to rate this game as one of the real gems you can find online if you like strategy and tactics. It isn’t the newest thing in the batch and it doesn’t look like a modern Triple A title- though I do think it looks good in its’ old way, and the globe is breathtaking.

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(Yes, this is what it really looks like in gameplay.. and this still doesn’t really do it justice compared to how it Moves.).

But what really makes it sparkle is the sheer *Depth.* There is an awful lot of depth to the game, from being on the worldview map deciding where to place bases like you’re a command in chief pointing at a map, taking emails, and tracking allied and friendly aircraft. To being down on a base managing what it researches or builds, to probably the heart of the game: meeting the enemy on the ground, where your squad and theirs fights it out for the future of a world one turn at a time. All the while trying to keep your coalition above water and close the tech gap.

The storytelling is also pretty good. The backstory lore is… probably average to above average, with the world of 2083 being a rather peaceful, idyllic place where super-nations and federations live in relative peace and increasing prosperity and freedom, even for places like the Middle East. The actual backstory I’d say is hit and miss with a few liberal buzzwords thrown around but nothing that offensive (unless you figure working with the UN is offensive in and of itself.... and by the off chance you DON’T playing politics with your funding nations will swiftly change your mind). On the whole I’d probably say there are some things that come across as incredibly optimistic or off tone, but others that sound incredibly prescient (like what happened to the US because of reckless deficit spending and China’s totalitarian expansionism before it fell). But I’d probably say that it comes across mostly like they wanted to establish one big happy world to juxtapose it against the coming darkness.

But the actual story over the game is quite good and (from what I’ve been told and can figure out) relatively scientifically sound (or “hard") as far as Sci-Fi goes. Don’t expect the enemy to let you get complacent, because there will be a lot of twists and turns before the end, and it’s obviously where most of the lore attention and juicy technological red meat went into. And wisely so!

So, I’d highly suggest you give it a try, for something that *might* have you coming back a lot.

Now, I’ve tries to explain why I like this. But what makes it topical?

Well, this game- and ones like it- is probably one of the great anti-terrorist epics in recent game history.

Yeah, you heard me right. Because while the enemy are aliens and the game is set in a relatively utopian world (again, including the MENA, Africa, and Asia...), the means and messages are far more down to Earth than Angela Merkel is. You see, the enemy you face are terrorists in how they act and behave, they just happen to be aliens terrorizing the Human Race. You’re going to be facing an enemy that will spend much of its’ time dropping violent squads in cities, indiscriminately murdering whoever they can before trying to get out just as suddenly as they struck. Trying to identify and pre-empt these attacks and strike at the heart of those waging murderous war on you is the heart of the game. And it will not be an easy one, because this will be a rather long war and all the while you will have to keep a weak kneed public and their politicians from losing their cool and simply surrendering to the terror, and yourself from being wiped out by attrition against an enemy that seems to have no trouble replacing its’ cannonfodder.

Yeah, that’s not familiar at alllllll....

In a way, it’s a chance to spend some hours away in the kind of position that you might dream of. Or have nightmares of. The chance to lead a combined, international fight to understand and destroy an enemy that endangers everyone and seeks to shape the world in its’ image. To make the calls and avoid the mistakes that Merkel/Obummer/InsertNameHere has. But at the same time that means that you will have nobody to blame more for defeat than yourself.

So hope you guys enjoy. If things like this are popular enough, I might make these kinds of “Free Game Spotlights” a semi-regular feature. >/br>

I’ll probably will try and get more posts after a day or so. But until then, I’ll be killing some digital terrorists of the human and alien varieties.... 




Posted by Turtler   United States  on 04/17/2016 at 02:18 PM   
Filed Under: • Amazing Science and DiscoveriesFun-StuffInternationalMilitaryScience-TechnologySelf-DefenseTerroristsWar On TerrorWar-Stories •  
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calendar   Tuesday - April 05, 2016

yesterday’s woodpile

Double Arrest Over Crab Legs Battle

A man and a woman were arrested on Saturday after a dispute over crab legs at a Connecticut restaurant turned physical.

Fox 61 reported police were called to Royal Buffet in Manchester at around 8 p.m. Saturday after a 21-year-old man was punched in the face.

Police said the victim’s mother used pepper spray on his assailants, but not before her son suffered a cut lip and a broken front tooth. It was not immediately clear what exactly caused the dispute.

Police arrested Clifford Knight, 45, and Latoya Knight, 38. Clifford Knight was charged with third-degree assault and disorderly conduct and released on $5,000 bail. Latoya Knight was charged with disorderly conduct and threatening and was released on $2,500 bail. Both are due in court April 14.

Neither the victim nor the victim’s mother will face charges over the incident. Investigators determined the mother used pepper spray in self-defense.

This is just one of the reasons I willl never go to a Golden Corral.


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Posted by Drew458   United States  on 04/05/2016 at 10:16 AM   
Filed Under: • Fun-StuffRacism and race relations •  
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calendar   Thursday - March 10, 2016

Rock ‘N Roll Time Machine

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What On Earth Is It?





Nah, we can’t play WhatsIt? any more. Image search engines are just too good. So I’ll tell you. You’re looking at a primitive computer program. In the same vein as Herman Hollerith’s punch cards and the programmable Jacquard loom, the scrolls are a repeatable finite set of machine instructions. ie, computer programs. It’s not their fault that they aren’t hooked up to a computer. That never stopped Lady Ada Lovelace.

Actually it’s the “sheet music” for a player piano. Which in this case is a crazy fancy calliope, not a piano. A fairground pipe organ from France, from over 100 years ago. And what delightful frilly bit of Turn of Last Century, Belle Époque French music is it playing, ever so sweetly? Bohemian Rhapsody by Queen.

Awesome.

Go play below the fold. Enjoy.

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Posted by Drew458   United States  on 03/10/2016 at 08:03 PM   
Filed Under: • Fun-StuffMusic •  
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calendar   Thursday - March 03, 2016

Dangerous Optical Illusion Ahead

Warning, warning, warning! May induce seizures or hypnotic-like trances. The shirt too!

75% NSFW

See More Below The Fold

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Posted by Drew458   United States  on 03/03/2016 at 10:09 AM   
Filed Under: • Fun-StuffSex •  
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calendar   Wednesday - March 02, 2016

groggy

That 4 o’clock feeling when it seems that 5 o’clock will never get here.

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Posted by Drew458   United States  on 03/02/2016 at 05:23 PM   
Filed Under: • AnimalsCat BloggingFun-Stuff •  
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DISCLAIMER
Allanspacer

THE SERVICES AND MATERIALS ON THIS WEBSITE ARE PROVIDED "AS IS" AND THE HOSTS OF THIS SITE EXPRESSLY DISCLAIMS ANY AND ALL WARRANTIES, EXPRESS OR IMPLIED, TO THE EXTENT PERMITTED BY LAW INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO WARRANTIES OF SATISFACTORY QUALITY, MERCHANTABILITY OR FITNESS FOR A PARTICULAR PURPOSE, WITH RESPECT TO THE SERVICE OR ANY MATERIALS.

Not that very many people ever read this far down, but this blog was the creation of Allan Kelly and his friend Vilmar. Vilmar moved on to his own blog some time ago, and Allan ran this place alone until his sudden and unexpected death partway through 2006. We all miss him. A lot. Even though he is gone this site will always still be more than a little bit his. We who are left to carry on the BMEWS tradition owe him a great debt of gratitude, and we hope to be able to pay that back by following his last advice to us all:
  1. Keep a firm grasp of Right and Wrong
  2. Stay involved with government on every level and don't let those bastards get away with a thing
  3. Use every legal means to defend yourself in the event of real internal trouble, and, most importantly:
  4. Keep talking to each other, whether here or elsewhere
It's been a long strange trip without you Skipper, but thanks for pointing us in the right direction and giving us a swift kick in the behind to get us going. Keep lookin' down on us, will ya? Thanks.

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Oh, and here's some kind of visitor flag counter thingy. Hey, all the cool blogs have one, so I should too. The Visitors Online thingy up at the top doesn't count anything, but it looks neat. It had better, since I paid actual money for it.
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