Monday - July 25, 2011
Woman! Thy Name is Stupid!
I guess I’ll have to explain that title. We all know that women are wonderful! We celebrate–Viva la differance!. Sorry, my spell-checker caught that too. The French can’t spell worth a damn.
Anyway, I had a new roof put on last year. This morning my wife asked me to walk with her (this is never good news).
Showed me how some squirrels screwed my new roof. Paid almost $9 grand for that roof!
Bad enough. I spent the morning trying to find someone to fix it. No go. Seems we had a very bad hail storm that I never heard about, luckily it missed us. But most roofers are very busy.
Then, my wife asked me to search the internet for ideas on how to squirrel-proof the home. Well, I did so. Can’t wait for her to get home and find out the most important thing to squirrel-proof the home. The same thing I’ve told her for years!
But I’m a man and therefore stupid. She disregards the fact that I grew up on a farm and never had squirrel problems.
How to squirrel-proof your property
In this case, and the song I’ve sung to my wife for twenty years is:
# 1 Remove the squirrels’ food source. Feed pets inside only. Get rid of bird feeders. Keep garbage cans well covered.
So she’s refused to believe me. She leaves bowls of cat food on the front and back porch. All it does is attract raccoons, opossums, squirrels, and lately, a skunk. I forgot to mention starlings. All of the above love cat food, and my wife is still refusing to believe that a bowl of cat food every day has caused the squirrels to nest in my brand new roof.
I’d call her a stupid woman, but that would be redundant! (wardmama is exempt. She’s not stupid, and I’m fairly certain she’s female. Despite that, I think she probably listens to her husband.)
What’s my point? Why is it that some females think their husbands don’t know anything? My wife did the same thing a few years ago: she bought a bale of hay and stuck it under our living room overhang. ‘For the poor kitty-kats’ she said. I pointed out that all she was doing was to make a nice, warm place for termites. Guess what? 2 years and $500 later, we got rid of the termites!
Posted by Christopher
on 07/25/2011 at 11:04 AM
Filed Under: • Family • Personal •
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