Thursday - March 24, 2011

the true story of how the internet began

You might have thought that you knew how the internet started, but here’s the TRUE
story ...

AND LO ... DOT COM DID BEGET THE NET

In ancient Israel, it came to pass that a trader by the name of Abraham Com did take
unto himself a young wife by the name of Dot.

And Dot Com was a comely woman, broad of shoulder and long of leg.  Indeed, she was often called Amazon Dot Com. 

And she said unto Abraham:  “Why dost thou travel so far from town with thy goods
when thou canst trade without ever leaving thy tent?”

And Abraham did look at her, as though she were several saddle bags short of a camel load, but simply said:  “How dear?”

And Dot replied:  “I will place drums in all the towns and drums in between to send messages saying what you have for sale, and they will reply telling you who hath the best price.  And the sale can be made on the drums and delivery made by Uriah’s Pony Stable (UPS).”

But to prevent neighboring countries overhearing what the drums were saying, Dot did devise a system only she and the drummers knew called Must Send Drum Over Sound (MSDOS), and in a language to transmit ideas and pictures - -
Hebrew To The People (HTTP).

But all this did arouse envy.  A man named Maccabia did secrete himself inside
Abraham’s drum and siphoned off some of Abraham’s business.  But he was arrested for insider trading.

And the young men did take to Dot Com’s trading as doth the greedy horsefly take to
camel dung.  They were called Nomadic Ecclesiatical Rich Dominican Sybarites, or
NERDS.

And lo, the land was so feverish with joy at the new riches that no one noticed that the
real riches were going to that enterprising drum dealer, Brother William of Gates, who bought out every drum maker in the land.  And indeed did insist on drums that would only work with brother Gates’ drumsticks.

And Dot did say:  “Oh Abraham, what we have started is being taken over by others.”
And Abraham looked out over the Bay of Ezekiel, or eBay as it was known, and said: 
“We need a name that reflects what we are.” And Dot replied:  Young Ambitious Hebrew Owner Operators.” ’YAHOO,’ said Abraham.

Abraham’s cousin, Joshua, a Gregarous Energetic Educated Kid (GEEK), did use Dot’s drums to locate things around the countryside.  It became known as God’s Own Official Guide to Locating Everything (GOOGLE).

And that’s how it all began.

BRIAN WELLS
Whitley Bay, Tyne and Wear, England

H/T Brian Wells and The Daily Mail

Posted by peiper     on 03/24/2011 at 01:14 PM   
Filed Under: • Humor •  
• Comments (9) • Trackbacks(0)  Permalink •  

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