Monday - October 06, 2008

The bacon was taken into custody. . .

I like that headline better than the one the Dayton Daily News chose:

Porcine scare clears Boehner’s West Chester office

See, I’m betting that many Daytonians, being drop-outs graduates of the Dayton public schools, don’t know what ‘porcine’ means. My headline is easily understandable to the average Daytonian, who not only was likely also taken into custody recently, but understands the word ‘bacon’. (Well, the ones that can read. . .)

I do know what ‘porcine’ means, but I wasn’t sure what to make of it in this context. Did a herd of swine invade Boehner’s office? (Maybe looking for ACORNs?) Yeah, guess I’ll have to read the dreaded Dayton Daily Democrat News:

HAMILTON — A package of low-sodium bacon triggered the evacuation of House Minority Leader John Boehner’s West Chester office on Monday, Oct. 6, after staff going through the mail became suspicious of oily residue leaking from a package.

Worried that the residue was evidence of some sort of attack, staffers contacted the Washington, D.C., office and Capitol police about 3:30 p.m.

The four staffers in the West Chester office were evacuated a half-hour later, according to Jessica Towhey, a Boehner spokeswoman.

Police, local fire officials and the Butler County hazardous material team were called to the office at 7969 Cincinnati-Dayton Road.

After two X-rays of the package were inconclusive, officials took the package out back and opened it, only to find it was bacon.

The bacon was taken into custody.

Definitely a better headline. But what a waste of bacon! If you are going to send pork to a congressman to make a political statement, at least send something useless, like pork rinds.

Then again, it was low-sodium bacon. (yuk!) Come to think of it, I’ve a #10 can of rancid lard I could send to, say, Harry Reid and Nancy Pelosi for that rancid, pork-laden bailout last week.

Mmmm, bacon!

Posted by Christopher     on 10/06/2008 at 09:58 PM   
Filed Under: • Fun-Stuff • Porkbusters •  
• Comments (2) • Trackbacks(0)  Permalink •  

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