We Need A Bigger Boat ….

 

1. With fish like that swimming under the water - fish that can sense me long before I can see them - I say, “Fuck that!” It just reinforces what I have known all along:  Civilization ends at the waters’ edge.

   Why voluntarily submit yourself from the top to the bottom of the food chain?  That is why God invented swimming pools....

   Posted by Illegitimi Non Carborundum       12/11/2004  at  12:39 PM  



2. I was a commercial fisherman for a decade.

   We used to troll for sharks for shits and
   grins after shrimping all day.

   Sharks are so far back in evolution they
   still have two brains. One fore and one aft.

   We caught this one beaut about 7 foot long
   and hauled it up and beat it to shit with
   a couple of baseball bats.

   Then we cut its throat and its tail so as
   to disable both ends. And split its belly.

   It was still moving. So we hung back over
   the side and played around some more.

   After a few hours we hauled it back and
   one of the crew went to remove the jaws.

   He was known as three finger there after.

   THEN, we hung it over the side for night.

   Woke and hauled it again. Another crewman
   went to remove the jaws and the bastard
   flipped so hard that it damned near broke
   his arm.

   Skipper pulled out a shotgun and blew the
   thing’s skull open.

   ONLY then was it dead enough to remove the
   jaws. BUT, when we tossed the carcass back
   in the drink, it tried to SWIM AWAY.

   Moral to this story? Yeah, humans would
   not have done well with dinosaurs and
   STAY FAR AWAY from anywhere there might be
   sharks.

   And no, this ain’t no fish story.

   Posted by Steel Turman       12/12/2004  at  03:02 AM  



3. The Mako is my ABSOLUTE favorite shark!!!
   THOSE MURDERS!!! Ya’ll know how I feel about people killing sharks!!!!
   Why didn’t you put a warning at the top"Barb, don’t read this, or Not for Barb.” or something. Glad I’m headed to church in a few hours cause now you’ve traumatized me Rest in Peace beautiful Mako*looks sullenly over glasses*

   Posted by Annoying Little Twerp       12/12/2004  at  09:48 AM  



4. They say shark steaks are tasty.  Yum Yum!!!

   Posted by Vilmar       12/12/2004  at  09:55 AM  



5. Yo, ALT,

   Having a favorite shark is analogous to
   having a favorite crocodile while swimming.

   CHOMP.

   Would you like some salt with that human?

   Posted by Steel Turman       12/12/2004  at  09:55 AM  



6. "The Mako is my ABSOLUTE favorite shark!!!
   THOSE MURDERS!!!”
   ....sounds like Barb just had a South Park, “They killed Kenny!!!...You BASTARDS!!!” kind of moment there. 

   Methinks you may be anthropomorphizing just a wee too much.  As far as shark goes, Mako is pretty tasty eating when cooked right.

   And, Steel, I was thinking that having a “favorite shark” is more analogous to having a favorite serial killer....awwww, poor Jeffrey Dahmer or Richard Ramirez…

   Posted by Illegitimi Non Carborundum       12/12/2004  at  01:20 PM  



7. Well that might be a better analogy BUT,
   I don’t have any favorite crocodiles either.

   ‘Cides when get u right down to it and cook
   ‘em up ...

   One tastes like a tough chicken drowned in
   mud and the other tastes like a tough bird
   with too much salt.

   Reminds me of an old joke.

   What does one lesbian frog say to her frog
   ‘pal’?

   Wow, we REALLY DO TASTE LIKE CHICKEN.

   Whoops, now I’ve done it.

   Better go finish my breakfast. Homefries,
   onions, eggs and SAUSAGE.

   Posted by Steel Turman       12/12/2004  at  01:36 PM  



8. Mako steaks are tastey. 

   There is something powerful in eating a creature that, in other circumstances, would eat you.

   Have any of you seen the footage of the Greenpeace’rs swimming off of Argentina?  Mr. White pop’s up in the midst of them and manages to take a leg off one of the girls.  I saw it on one of the real video shows.

   Posted by Tacberry       12/13/2004  at  09:25 AM  

Commenting is not available in this weblog entry.