Most Ridiculous Item Of The Day

 

1. Jeez! Skipper, I been waiting for a week for the topic to be lawyers: OK! HERE GOES!
   -------------------------------------------

   An attorney got home late one evening after a very taxing
   day trying to get a stay of execution for a client, Cletus Wright, who
   was due to be hanged for murder at midnight. His plea for
   clemency to the governor had failed and he was feeling worn out and
   depressed.
   
   As soon as he got through the door at home, his wife
   started on him:"What time of night do you call this? Where have you
   been?” And so on.
   
   Too shattered to fight, he poured himself a big slug of whisky and headed off for a long
   hot soak in the bathtub.
   While he was in the bath, the phone rang. The wife
   answered and was told that her husband’s client had been granted his stay
   of execution after all. Realizing what a day he must have had,
   she decided togo upstairs to give him the good news.
   As she opened the bathroom door, her husband was bent over naked drying his
   legs and feet.
   
   “They’re not hanging Wright tonight,” she said.
   
   He whirled around and yelled , “FOR CRYING OUT LOUD,
   WOMAN, DON’T YOU EVER STOP!”
                

   Posted by Oink       09/27/2005  at  11:55 PM  



2. These jokes are why Muslims and Jews hate pork.

    

   Posted by The Skipper       09/28/2005  at  12:06 AM  



3. Ok, he’s going to be put to death, what’s with the $25 million wrongful death suit?

   Posted by Elliott       09/28/2005  at  02:26 AM  



4. Everyones probably heard this one but, HEADLINE-- Bad news today.  A bus loaded with lawyers went over a cliff killing all on board..The really bad news is that there were 2 empty seats.... BWAAAHAHAHAHA

   Posted by bat crusher       09/28/2005  at  03:55 AM  



5. Skipper: They don’t so much hate pork—they regard the pig as a filthy animal—half rat & half dog.

   We started that rumor.

   Posted by Oink       09/28/2005  at  06:29 AM  



6. Might one be forgiven for observing that the electric chair would be too good for both the defendant and his stage manager in this instance? 

   

   Posted by Tannenberg       09/28/2005  at  09:00 AM  



7. Somebody remind me; how did he kill her?

   Posted by StinKerr       09/28/2005  at  12:48 PM  



8. This is a joke, right?

   I mean, life insurance for being executed by the State? Give me a break.

   On the other hand, I’d support it if the proceeds go to her parents, who wanted to keep her alive.

   F***king vampire.

   Posted by Christopher       09/29/2005  at  08:27 PM  



9. Oops, wrong trial. Ignore the above…

   What? Life insurance for executing your wife?

   Posted by Christopher       09/29/2005  at  08:29 PM  



10. Like everybody else, I’m pretty sure he did it. Unfortunately they never showed a cause of death, how he did it or even when.

    I’m of the opinion that the circumstantial evidence (and his trial in the media) may have been enough to convict him but it’s not enough to execute him.

    As to the life insurance, I’m guessing that Geragos is the one who wants it to help pay his bill.

    Posted by StinKerr       09/29/2005  at  08:43 PM  

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