Men: The Rules We Live By

 

1. 30. No man may never, EVER, apply suntan lotion, oils, or powders to the bare skin of another man in public. 

   31. No man may compliment another man on his clothing.

   Posted by rudebadger       08/03/2006  at  02:40 PM  



2. Cute - I think most men will agree with every one of those statements, but, just for clarification on the female front: If my husband makes either of the comments in #29, he will end up with neither.

   Posted by Punkins       08/03/2006  at  03:52 PM  



3. 1: REAL men don’t carry umbrellas (except for a lovely lady in need).

   19: I don’t have to worry about getting compliments on my “six-pack”, it’s more like a keg. 

   10: Just keep in mind: Men may fart, but women only “toot” harmlessly…

   Friends don’t let friends vote democrat.

   Posted by Rat Patrol       08/04/2006  at  07:11 AM  



4. Can’t say that I agree with rule #26, what’s more, whoever came up with that one just doesn’t understand redneck bubbas and the NASCAR crowd.

   I can think of good, decent dudely cars & trucks that have been driven by good dudely dudes in all of those colors with 1 exception:

   Pink

   Thou Shalt Not Buy or Drive a Pink Car.  Period!

   Brown:  Nah, lotsa dudely dudes have brown trucks—they are especially good for hunting, the color blends in pretty well and doesn’t tend to spook the game.

   Orange:  Nah, think about the Dukes of Hazzard.  What about General Lee?  Can you imagine NASCAR without orange cars?  Nope, me neither.  My first wife’s brother drove an orange Trans Am—say what you will about it/him (he was an idiot), but that was not a chick-mobile.  Ticket trap? Yes.  Chick-mobile?  Not a chance.

   Lime Green:  Nope.  I knew this one dude who had a lime green Duster. Again, say what you will about it/him, but that was NOT a chick-mobile.

   Sky Blue:  Again, nope.  I had this one buddy who had a sky blue ‘Cuda.  Ok, so he was a genuine moron who once got hisself throwed in jail for doing donuts out on NASA 1 (a 4 lane hiway back home in Tx) with said blue ‘Cuda.  Yes, alchohol was involved.  Say what you will about him/it, but that was NOT a chick-mobile.

   Posted by gb_in_ga       08/04/2006  at  12:57 PM  



5. Just one disagreement. If you are drinking free beer, no complaints. In fact, whining about the temperature of beer is for pussies. When you’ve been in the field for weeks, and you come back to a base that has showers, hot chow, and beer, you drink it. Even if you take it off a pallet of Bud that has been sitting in the tropical sun, you drink it. And when you have gotten good and thuroughly drunk on hot Budweiser, you never complain about the temperature of beer again.

   Semper Fidelis,
   ASM826

   Posted by ASM826       08/05/2006  at  06:45 PM  

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