When I was a computer/copier/fax tech back in the day, of course I couldn’t cuss a blue streak in front of the customers. I ended up getting far too much mileage out of the phrase, “Shucks, and other comments.”
I had a buddy years ago who called me up one time and told me his computer was having problems, he couldn’t fix it, and “come and get this thing or I am going to fill it full of 9mm holes.” I told him that was a permanent action that I could not undo. He didn’t shoot it and I was able to fix it.