A Bloody Shame
Personally I think the downturn is because of the long gray pointed things we send out into the world looking for scum like these. One of the most unrecognized jobs we do for the world. The Brits have been doing it a lot longer but need a bit of help these days.
Yes, I am a pirate two hundred years too late.
The cannons don’t thunder there’s nothin’ to plunder
I’m an over forty victim of fate
Arriving too late, arriving too late.I’ve done a bit of smugglin’
I’ve run my share of grass.
I made enough money to buy Miami,
But I pissed it away so fast,
Never meant to last, never meant to last.I have been drunk now for over two weeks,
I passed out and I rallied and I sprung a few leaks,
But I’ve got to stop wishin’,
Got to go fishin’, I’m down to rock bottom again.
Just a few friends, just a few friends.I go for younger women, lived with several awhile
And though I ran away, they’ll come back one day.
And still could manage a smile
It just takes awhile, just takes awhile.Mother, mother ocean, after all these years I’ve found
My occupational hazard being my occupations
just not around.
I feel like I’ve drowned,
Gonna head uptown.
Posted by Z Woof
07/20/2005 at 09:42 AM
From the Fair Isle of Limerick:
There once was a pirate named Bates
Who tried to do the fandango on skates
Til he slipped on his cutlass
Which rendered him nutless
And virtually useless on dates.‘twas a crusty old sailor named Art,
Who let out a most terrible fart,
He tried to restrict ‘er,
It went off the Richter,
And caused the Red Sea to repart.Art sailed on a Brig to Rangoon,
Where his rumblings could be heard from the moon,
And when you’d least expect ‘em,
They burst from his rectum,
With the fury of a raging typhoon!Then there’s “Aboard the Good Ship Venus”
but I’ll leave that for someone else to post - if they dare…
LC RP
Sorry, I lied
THE GOOD SHIP VENUS
(((((((( This comment has been censored by the Blog Decency Commission. ))))))))
That’s quite alright, I don’t blame you one bit…
LC RP
I figured that “Venus” might get torpedoed, but it would be a good cheap laugh for those who found it early on.
I won’t bother posting any links for “Venus”, but one can always do a google/yahoo search…
Like any old sea shanty (or is that chanty), there are multiple variations to the theme.
LC RP
I got the email notification, RP, and I agree with the “Blog Decency Commission”. It was somewhat imaginative but totally gratuitous.
Indeed, with a few tots of rum on board and remarkably little encouragement I’ve been known to sing Barnacle Bill the Sailor. I wouldn’t sing Venus alone in the shower. But that’s just me.
