Wednesday - August 10, 2005

Bonnie & Clyde Captured In Ohio

The manhunt is over. The Tennessee couple who broke out of jail and killed a police officer have just been captured in Columbus, Ohio ....

COLUMBUS, Ohio (AP) - Aug 10, 11:39 PM (ET)—A fugitive inmate and his wife, wanted in a brazen courthouse escape and shooting in Tennessee, were captured Wednesday night at an Ohio motel after a tip from a cab driver who had dropped them off, authorities said. George Hyatte and Jennifer Forsyth Hyatte were in a room at an America’s Best Value Inn in Columbus and were arrested without a struggle, said Mark Gwyn, director of the Tennessee Bureau of Investigation.

“We have found weapons,” he said. “We don’t know if it’s the murder weapon, but we’re processing those as we speak.”

On Tuesday, authorities say Jennifer Hyatte, 31, ambushed two guards as they were leading her 34-year-old husband from a courthouse hearing in Kingston, Tenn., about 300 miles south of Columbus. Guard Wayne “Cotton” Morgan was fatally shot in the escape. Jennifer Hyatte had some injuries, Gwyn said, but he declined to elaborate. He said the couple would be brought back to Tennessee on warrants for first degree murder.

Authorities had already tracked the Hyattes to the Cincinnati area when they got a tip around 9 p.m. that the couple was at the Columbus motel. A cab driver who had apparently driven them from Columbus from Erlanger, Ky., just south of Cincinnati, called Erlanger police, U.S. Marshal John Schickel said. He declined to give any additional information or identify the cab driver.

After the tip, authorities surrounded the Columbus motel, said John Bolen, a supervisor for the U.S. Marshals Service in Columbus. Authorities called the motel room where the couple was staying, told them they were surrounded, and the couple came out of their room and surrendered around 10 p.m., Bolen said. They didn’t say anything during the arrest, he said.

Posted by The Skipper     on 08/10/2005 at 10:42 PM   
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Stupid Criminals, Part II

BWAH-HAH-HAH-HA-HA-HA-AH-HAH-HAH-HA-HA-HA-AH-HAH-HAH-HA-HA-HA-AH ....

TAMPA TRIBUNE (AP) --Marvin Williams thought it would be funny to put a blue-and-red flashing light on the dashboard of his friend’s car and pretend to pull over another motorist, police said. But the joke backfired Sunday night when Williams picked a car with two undercover Tampa cops inside.

It didn’t help much when he laughed about it as he drove by. Then, when police followed him, the 22-year-old Williams ran from the vehicle, officials say. He left behind two female friends who were riding with him, and 7 grams of cocaine on the center console, police said. The officers caught up, caught him and found the drugs.

Williams was charged with cocaine possession, impersonating a law enforcement officer and resisting arrest. Officers also arrested a woman riding in the front seat and charged her with cocaine possession. Williams posted $4,500 bail Monday night and was released. A working phone number could not be located for him Tuesday, and it wasn’t known if he had an attorney.

Police spokeswoman Laura McElroy said Williams joked with his passengers about pulling someone over in the moments before pulling behind Officers Sean Kruger and Jason Degagne shortly before midnight. “The joke was on him,” McElroy said. “His victims turned out to be police officers who escorted him to jail - with a real blue light.”

Posted by The Skipper     on 08/10/2005 at 10:26 PM   
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   Tuesday - August 09, 2005

There Can Be Only One!

Michigan cops are still trying to figure out this asshat who .... well .... went medieval on them (link goes to The Smoking Gun by way of Fark) ....

Crusader Nabbed By Michigan Cops
Medieval sword, mallet, armor no match for ye olde Taser

AUGUST 5—Meet Robert McClain. The Michigan man, 42, was arrested last week after he attempted to literally go medieval on cops. According to the Royal Oak Police Department report, officers were dispatched to McClain’s home after a motorist called 911 to report that McClain had fled the scene of an auto accident. When they arrived at his crib, McClain allegedly tried to strike a cop with a four-foot sword.

After missing, McClain retreated to his basement, where he donned a chainmail armored vest and leather gauntlets to protect his arms. He also added a giant wooden mallet to his arsenal and beckoned officers to come downstairs and get him. “I’m gonna crush your fucking skulls,” McClain warned. Then, in a nice rhetorical flourish (for a lunatic, at least), he added, “I have a thousand years of power.”

That omnipotence, however, was no match for a police Taser, which felled McClain. He was then carted off and charged with felony assault and a misdemeanor count for failing to remain at an accident scene.

Posted by The Skipper     on 08/09/2005 at 03:21 PM   
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Where Are They Now?

From the “Where Are They Now” department our crack staff has uncovered the whereabouts of Jennnifer Wilbanks, the so-called “Runaway Bride”. She is mowing the lawn at the courthouse and washing police cars ....

LAWRENCEVILLE, Ga. (AP)—Runaway bride Jennifer Wilbanks mowed the lawn of a government building Tuesday as part of her court-ordered community service for lying to police after she ran off days before her scheduled wedding.

Wearing an orange community service vest, a ballcap that said “Life is good” and running shoes, Wilbanks seemed upbeat as she pushed a powered mower by a swarm of reporters and photographers. She briefly spoke when the mower’s engine died in tall, wet grass.

“I’m doing well,” said Wilbanks, who has been undergoing mental health treatment. She admitted with a laugh that it had been a long time since she had mowed a lawn.

“I need to get back to work. I don’t want to get into trouble,” she added.

Her lawn mower then kept dying in the grass, each time prompting her to repeatedly yank on the pull string to restart it. After the eighth time it quit, she let out a big sigh.

In all, she was ordered to do 120 hours of service. Wilbanks had already completed 16 hours of her sentence by cleaning probation offices and washing public vehicles. Department of Corrections spokeswoman Peggy Chapman said Wilbanks planned to work off eight more hours Tuesday, also picking up trash.

“She’s a hard worker. She didn’t take advantage of anything. She did more work than most people,” said 17-year-old Michael Powell, who has cleaned bathrooms and offices with Wilbanks while working off his own sentence of 80 hours of community service for an offense he declined to disclose.

Posted by The Skipper     on 08/09/2005 at 12:36 PM   
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   Sunday - August 07, 2005

Pirates In My Neighborhood?

DANG! I got a real live movie pirate right here in my neighborhood - at least he’s a few miles north of me .... and I didn’t even know it. The pirate in question, is a 19-year-old teenager who has been making “cam-jobs” of first run movies. These “cammers”, as they are called, secretly film movies with hidden cameras and upload them to the internet “warez” groups. This kid, however, is probably going to jail .... for filming (at least what I heard) are two really lousy movies ....

(AP) --A Missouri teenager is the latest to be indicted by a San Jose federal grand jury in a string of prosecutions involving members of a secretive computer-piracy group. Curtis Salisbury, 19, of St. Charles, Mo., was charged Wednesday with using a video recorder to make copies of newly released movies and uploading them to a computer network for distribution. He is the first person to be prosecuted under the Family Entertainment and Copyright Act, which was signed by President Bush in April.

Salisbury is charged with conspiracy and copyright infringement for copying two movies, ``The Perfect Man’’ and ``Bewitched.’’ The films were then distributed through ``warez’’ sites on the Internet—secretive, member-only sites where illegal copies of software and pirated entertainment are available for download. He is also accused of downloading ``Madagascar’’ and computer programs sold by Sony and Adobe Systems. He is scheduled to appear before U.S. Magistrate Patricia V. Trumbull in San Jose Aug. 19 at 1:30 p.m.

The maximum penalty faced by Salisbury if convicted is five years in prison and a fine of $250,000 for counts of conspiracy and violating the copyright act, and three years and $250,000 for a count of unauthorized recording of movies. Warez is a source of illegally copied computer programs and, more recently, first-run movies and DVDs. It was targeted by the FBI in a two-year undercover Operation Copycat investigation and a larger investigation called Operation Site Down.

In the argot of warez members—pronounced ``wares’’ and derived from the word software—Salisbury is accused of being a ``cammer.’’ Cammers are specialized warez members who record first-run movies with concealed camcorders and then place them on Internet servers after removing data that could be traced. Cammers are entitled to three movie downloads from the illegal sites for every uploaded movie. The indictment states that Salisbury also discussed payment with an unnamed individual.

Posted by The Skipper     on 08/07/2005 at 07:11 AM   
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   Friday - August 05, 2005

More Prisoner Abuse In The News

Question: what do the two quotes below have in common? Answer: absolutely nothing.

Amendment VIII

Excessive bail shall not be required, nor excessive fines imposed, nor cruel and unusual punishments inflicted.

COLORADO SPRINGS, Colo. (AP)—Five straight turkey dinners prompted El Paso County jail inmates to go on a brief hunger strike. The inmates refused to eat Saturday, arguing that meals such as turkey chili mac, turkey a la king, turkey stew and turkey sausage were unnecessarily cruel.

Sheriff’s officials said Wednesday that the hunger strike ended after about half an hour.

“Turkey, turkey and more turkey is not a form of punishment,” the Sheriff’s Office said in a tongue-in-cheek prepared statement. “The inmates accepted this reasoning and gobbled up their dinner meal.”

The inmates had spaghetti for dinner Wednesday — with turkey-based meat sauce.

Posted by The Skipper     on 08/05/2005 at 02:10 AM   
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   Thursday - August 04, 2005

Most Ridiculous Item Of The Day

How stupid can people get? After reading the story below, I had to re-adjust my stupidity meter. There needs to be a “stupid index” to rate these clowns. If so, the two people in this news story would rank somewhere off the far bottom of the scale. If you’re inclined to ask “what were they thinking”, don’t bother. My impression is neither the mother or the daughter were thinking at all. Just sit back and enjoy the entertainment ....

Daughter Caught Making Meth To Bail Out Mother:
Mother Was Police Officer Facing Pot Charges

LINCOLN, Ill. (AP)—There is a bizarre twist in the case of a former Lincoln, Illinois police officer facing marijuana possession charges. Her 24-year-old daughter has been charged with trying to make methamphetamine to raise bail for her mother.

Authorities say Brianna Strohl’s mother, Diana Short, asked her daughter to collect materials to make methamphetamine because Short needed to post another $7,500 to get out of jail. Authorities were tipped onto the plot by Logan County Jail inmates.

Short, who had been a Lincoln police officer until her arrest, previously was accused of growing marijuana plants in her basement.

Strohl and Short both were charged yesterday with several felony counts related to making methamphetamine. Short now needs $25,000 to get out of jail, and Strohl is being held in lieu of ten-thousand dollars bond.

Posted by The Skipper     on 08/04/2005 at 04:19 AM   
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   Wednesday - August 03, 2005

Stupid Criminal Of The Day

Altogether, this doesn’t seem like that bad an idea and a way to make money .. except for the fact that it’s illegal ....

BERLIN (Reuters) - A court in Germany convicted a man for fraud after he racked up huge phone bills phoning a sex hotline from work and split the proceeds with a woman working at the service, authorities said Wednesday.

“He wasn’t calling for the stimulation,” said a spokesman for the court in the western city of Duesseldorf.

The court handed the 38-year-old an eight-month suspended jail sentence for the ruse which he cooked up with the hotline worker while working for a local medical insurer.

German media said the man had made more than 160 calls within half a year, at a cost to his company of almost 16,000 euros ($19,700).

Posted by The Skipper     on 08/03/2005 at 05:34 PM   
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   Tuesday - August 02, 2005

Politically Correct Blackmail

I almost started this post with “I don’t believe this ....” but after watching the PC crowd over the last 10-15 years, I am saddened to say, yes, I can easily believe this will happen ....

Britain Could Pay One Million Dollars To Brazilian Family

LONDON, (AFP) - Britain’s Metropolitan Police could pay up to one million dollars in damages to the family of the innocent Brazilian who was shot dead in a bungled anti-terror chase in London, a newspaper reported. The Daily Mail said John Yates, deputy assistant commissioner at Scotland Yard, was expected to make an initial payment to the family of electrician Jean Charles de Menezes, 27.

However, legal experts quoted by the Daily Mail believe the force could end up paying up to one million dollars to the impoverished family. Police officials were quoted as saying the final figure will be “very substantial.” In Sao Paulo, the Globonews website said a British government delegation had arrived in Brazil Sunday and would travel Monday to de Menezes’ home town of Gonzaga, in southeast Brazil, to meet his parents to discuss compensation.

De Menezes was killed on July 22 after British police followed him from a London address they had been watching in connection with four failed bomb attacks the day before. Mistaking him for a suicide bomber, officers cornered the Brazilian inside a subway train and shot him eight times at close range, seven times in the head. He was buried in Gonzaga on Friday in a ceremony that attracted an estimated 10,000 people and was marked by anti-British protests.

You already know the facts: (1) Menezes was in the country illegally since his visa had expired, (2) he was seen wearing a heavy overcoat in the Tube in July, (3) when police tried to detain him for questioning he ran, (4) he resisted police until they shot him.

Now, what does this tell us about the recently deceased? 

Well, it tells me:

• He didn’t care a fig about British law or else he would have (a) applied to renew his visa or (b) gone back to Brazil. This made him a criminal and an illegal alien, according to British law. As such, he should have been jailed or deported anyway. Thanks to British Liberals like Cherie Blair, wife of PM Tony Blair, it is almost impossible to find or get rid of these creeps who defy British law once they get into the country. Verdict: criminal.


• He was badly overdressed for the occasion. As the saying goes, only mad dogs and Englishmen go out in the noonday sun but our criminal from Brazil felt the need to dress up in a heavy overcoat in July in the stuffy confines of the London Tube. This man would probably have been stupid enough to try to stroll through airport security in New York with a dozen box cutters in his pockets a few weeks after 9/11. Verdict: stupid.


• He obviously had a guilty conscience about something else why would he run away when police shouted at him to stop and answer questions. He ran away and struggled with police when they finally caught up to him. What was on his mind (beside the five bullets he earned for his stupidity)? British Bobbies are the most polite, easygoing police force in the world. What did he have to fear? Verdict: guilty.


• Scenario: you’re surrounded by heavily armed cops who are obviously very pissed at you for running away from them. What do you do? Me, I’d fall to the ground spread-eagled, face-down, and crying as loud as I could, “MOMMA, HELP ME! PLEASE DON’T SHOOT! PLEASE! PLEASE!”. It never hurts, in a situation like this, to let the nervous policemen know you are a craven coward who has just pissed his pants. Verdict: defiant.

There you have it .. a stupid criminal who felt guilty about something and decided to defy the police. And for this, his family and the bleeding heart Liberals in Britain think the government should pay this blackmail money of $1 million to this bunch of extortionists in Brazil. NO, SIR! Tell them to go pound sand. Tell them to s**t in one hand and wish in the other. Tell them to bugger off. And then kick the rest of the Menezas family out of Britain, whether they’re legal citizens or not. No more Mr. Nice Guy!

Britain should just tell Brazil: “YOU WANT A MILLION OUT OF US? COME AND GET IT, ASSHATS! WE’LL MEET YOU AT THE SHORE! CHEERIO!”

Posted by The Skipper     on 08/02/2005 at 09:12 AM   
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   Saturday - July 30, 2005

Saddam Attacked

Our favorite mass-murderer, Sodomy Hussein, almost got his ass whupped in court yesterday - literally. Too bad. I still think we should tie him down in chains in Baghdad’s central square and let all the citizens come stone him to death ....

AMMAN, Jordan (AP)—Members of Saddam Hussein’s Jordan-based defense team claimed Saturday the former Iraqi president was attacked during a recent court appearance, a claim immediately disputed by the chief investigating judge of the tribunal.

A man burst out from those gathered in the courtroom Thursday and tried to hit Saddam as the ousted leader was leaving the courtroom after a 45-minute hearing, Saddam’s legal team said in a statement.

“There was an exchange of blows between the man and the president,” the statement said, also claiming the judge overseeing the hearing did nothing to stop the assault.

Judge Raid Juhi of the Iraqi Special Tribunal denied Saturday any incident involving Saddam occurred and said the hearing was conducted in a calm and low-key atmosphere. Juhi, however, did not attend the hearing, which was presided over by different judge.

The lawyers said the attacker’s identity was known, but their statement did not give his name or say whether Saddam was hurt.

Independent verification of the incident was not possible. Only certain portions of Thursday’s hearing were televised. Photographs released did not show any injuries to Saddam’s face.

Posted by The Skipper     on 07/30/2005 at 11:52 AM   
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   Friday - July 29, 2005

Weekly Moonbat Top-Ten List

This week’s Top-Ten List concerns one of our favorite criminals .. O.J. Simpson. The dude just never learns. In case you haven’t been keeping up with current events, O.J. was caught with electronic equipment in his home that allowed him to tap into Direct TV’s satellite signals and get free premium movies, etc. He was found guilty and ordered to pay a $25,000 fine. Of course, his mouthpiece said he was innocent, “IF THE REMOTE DON’T FIT YOU MUST ACQUIT!” - The judge disagreed ....

(CHICAGO TRIBUNE - July 27, 2005)—DirecTV said “the evidence was overwhelming” against O.J. Simpson. But the ex-football star’s lawyer said he did nothing wrong. The satellite TV giant on Tuesday was referring to its civil court victory in which a Florida judge ordered Simpson to pay $25,000 for allegedly stealing its signals. The case stems from the recovery in 2001 of two “bootloaders” in Simpson’s home that allowed viewers to tap into DirecTV signals without paying for them.

Simpson’s lawyer, Yale Galanter, said his client would appeal the judge’s ruling. “There is no evidence that he knew or should have known” that the devices in his home were illegal, he said.  According to news reports in 2001, federal agents were at Simpson’s home on a six-hour raid related to an investigation of an Ecstasy drug ring, money laundering and the counterfeiting of satellite equipment. Simpson was not arrested.

And now for this week’s Top Ten List:

Top Ten O.J. Simpson Excuses For Stealing Direct TV

10. For some reason, cable guy is afraid to come to the house

9. Spends a lot of time watching television now that it’s too hot to go out and kill people

8. Wanted to see where he ranked on Court TV’s 100 Creepiest Acquitted Murderers

7. Figured “real killers” might show up on one of them great premium movie channels

6. It was a rare lapse in judgement

5. Believe it or not, he’s had a bit of trouble landing a job

4. “Hey, any publicity is good publicity, am I right?”

3. Cable’s been out since he stabbed his television

2. Since when is stealing against the law?!

1. It’s not like he killed anyone

Posted by The Skipper     on 07/29/2005 at 12:45 PM   
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   Wednesday - July 27, 2005

Pedophiles In France On Trial

The largest sex-abuse trial in history is almost at a conclusion in (where else?) France. Sixty-five suspects are accused of sexually abusing 45 children between six months to 14 years. Is it any wonder France is at the top of my personal list of nuclear bomb test sites?

(BBC) --A court in the French town of Angers has begun hearing the verdict in the biggest child abuse case in the country’s legal history. It is expected to take the jury, which spent more than a month deliberating, several hours to read out the verdicts. Sixty-five men and women who have been on trial since March are accused of sexually abusing 45 children between six months to 14 years.

Some of the defendants could face life in prison if convicted. They include 39 men and 26 women, aged 27 to 73. The crimes allegedly took place between January 1999 and February 2002 in Angers’ Saint-Leonard district. Full identification of the suspects has been banned to protect the identity of the children.

During the five-month trial, jurors heard pre-recorded evidence given by some of the children. Correspondents say the accused - many of whom were unemployed and lived on benefits - said little in court and seemed confused by the proceedings. About 20 of them have acknowledged some of the charges, while others insist they knew nothing about the paedophile ring.

There were originally 66 accused, but one defendant is in hospital and will not be in court for the verdict. Defence lawyers have called for many acquittals, citing lack of evidence. They also pointed out that many of the accused had suffered abuse as children themselves.

Posted by The Skipper     on 07/27/2005 at 08:41 AM   
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Tourists Warned About Mexico

The US government is warning Americans to stay out of Mexico as violence along the border continues to rise. My only question is, who the hell wants to go to Mexico anyway? Even the MESS-CANS are running away ....

MEXICO CITY (Reuters) - The United States renewed a travel warning on Tuesday for U.S. citizens crossing the border into Mexico, noting more than 100 murders had occurred in the border region since June. The U.S. ambassador in Mexico, Tony Garza, said that with violence showing no sign of abating, the travel warning issued twice by Washington since the start of the year had been extended and would be reviewed as necessary.

“The Mexican government is beginning to address concerns about the unacceptable level of violence along our border. Nevertheless, more than 100 violent deaths have occurred along the border since June,” Garza said. “Eighteen Nuevo Laredo policemen were killed this year, including eight in July. These disturbing reports make clear that Mexico needs to do much more to bring safety and security to our common border.”

Mexico, which has reacted angrily to previous travel alerts and accused Washington of interfering in its business, retorted with a short statement saying it was continuing its efforts to fight organized crime. “As it has reiterated on various occasions, the government maintains a constant fight against organized crime and is undertaking a series of actions to quell violence on the border,” the foreign ministry said in a short statement.

Violence in northern Mexico has soared this year, leaving at least 600 dead, after President Vicente Fox launched a “mother of all battles” on drug gangs fighting turf battles there. Fox sent hundreds of anti-drug troops to the area in June after a spate of police shootings in border cities, where cartels from the western state of Sinaloa are battling local Gulf cartel rivals for control of the cross-border cocaine, marijuana and amphetamine trade. One of the worst trouble spots is Nuevo Laredo, south of Laredo, Texas, where dozens of people have been murdered this year and some 30 U.S. citizens have been kidnapped since last August.

Posted by The Skipper     on 07/27/2005 at 08:32 AM   
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   Tuesday - July 26, 2005

Most Confusing Headline Of The Day

I haven’t got a clue what to think about this story. In my humble opinion, it just ain’t right but the guy tried to do the right thing and will go to jail anyway, thanks to an agressive attorney general. I’ll leave it up to you to decide. This one has way too many shades of gray in it for me ....

Man Charged for Having Sex With Teen Wife
_{July 26, 2005, 4:11 PM EDT}

LINCOLN, Neb. (AP)—A 22-year-old man faces criminal charges in Nebraska for having sex with an underage 13-year-old girl, although he legally married her in Kansas after she became pregnant. The man’s lawyer said the couple, with their families’ support, “made a responsible decision to try to cope with the problem.”

Matthew Koso, 22, was charged Monday with first-degree sexual assault, punishable by up to 50 years in prison. He was released on $7,500 bail pending an Aug. 17 preliminary hearing. After the girl became pregnant, her mother gave permission in May for Koso to take the young woman to Kansas, which allows minors to get married with parental consent. The girl is now 14 and seven months pregnant.

“The idea ... is repugnant to me,” said Nebraska Attorney General Jon Bruning. “These people made the decision to send their ... 14-year-old daughter to Kansas to marry a pedophile.” He said the marriage is valid, thanks to the “ridiculous” Kansas law, “but it doesn’t matter. I’m not going to stand by while a grown man ... has a relationship with a 13-year-old—now 14-year-old—girl.”

Bruning, who has said he will seek a second term in 2006, has aggressively prosecuted sex crimes against children since he was elected in 2002 The couple were married in May by a judge in Hiawatha, Kan., just across the state line from Falls City. Nebraska allows people as young as 17 to marry if they have parental consent.

Kansas law, however, sets no minimum marriage age, although case law sets the minimum age at 14 for boys and 12 for girls. The marriage must be approved by both parents or guardian, or by a district court judge, said Whitney Watson, spokesman for Kansas Attorney General Phill Kline. A judge also must approve if only one parent approves.

Koso’s lawyer, Willis Yoesel, said the girl’s mother and Koso’s parents approved of the marriage. He said the girl’s father has not lived with the family for some time. “It seems to me like they, as much as they could, made a responsible decision to try to cope with the problem,” Yoesel said. “The families are all united in this effort,” Yoesel said. “I don’t know who is complaining. ... What benefit is there to anybody in the prosecution of this young man?”

There was no comment from Koso, who does not have a listed telephone number.

Posted by The Skipper     on 07/26/2005 at 04:57 PM   
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