When Sarah Palin booked a flight to Europe, the French immediately surrendered.
Thursday - August 05, 2004
Daily Dose
Quotes of the DayThe keenest sorrow is to recognize ourselves as the sole cause of all our adversities. Sophocles (496 BC - 406 BC)
If the automobile had followed the same development cycle as the computer, a Rolls-Royce would today cost $100, get a million miles per gallon, and explode once a year, killing everyone inside. Robert X. Cringely, InfoWorld magazine
I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life. Rita Rudner
On This Day in History
1861 US Army abolishes flogging
1861 For the first time, the U.S. government levied an income tax.
1864 Battle of Mobile Bay, Ala; Adm David Farragut orders "Damn the torpedoes, full speed ahead!"
1884 The cornerstone for the Statue of Liberty was laid on Bedloe's Island.
1945 Atom Bomb dropped on Hiroshima (Aug 6th in Japan)
1962 Marilyn Monroe died.
1981 Pres Reaan fires 11,500 air traffic controllers who struck 2 days ago
1944 Hundreds of Jews are freed from forced labor in Warsaw
On this day in 1944, Polish insurgents liberate a German forced-labor camp in Warsaw, freeing 348 Jewish prisoners, who join in a general uprising against the German occupiers of the city.
As the Red Army advanced on Warsaw in July, Polish patriots, still loyal to their government-in-exile back in London, prepared to overthrow their German occupiers. On July 29, the Polish Home Army (underground), the People's Army (a communist guerilla movement), and armed civilians took back two-thirds of Warsaw from the Germans. On August 4, the Germans counterattacked, mowing down Polish civilians with machine-gun fire. By August 5, more than 15,000 Poles were dead. The Polish command cried to the Allies for help. Churchill telegraphed Stalin, informing him that the British intended to drop ammunition and other supplies into the southwest quarter of Warsaw to aid the insurgents. The prime minister asked Stalin to aid in the insurgents' cause. Stalin balked, claiming the insurgency was too insignificant to waste time with.
Britain succeeded to getting some aid to the Polish patriots, but the Germans also succeeded-in dropping incendiary bombs. The Poles fought on, and on August 5 they freed Jewish forced laborers who then joined in the battle, some of whom formed a special platoon dedicated solely to repairing captured German tanks for use in the struggle.
The Poles would battle on for weeks against German reinforcements, and without Soviet help, as Joseph Stalin had his own plans for Poland.
1914 Red Light, Green Light
The first traffic light was installed at the intersection of Euclid Avenue and East 105th Street in Cleveland, Ohio. Earlier roads, shared by horses, cars, and streetcars, were chaotic. As accidents and traffic increased it became apparent that some rules of the road were required. The traffic light was only one of several improvements to arrive in this period--the traffic island was introduced in 1907, dividing lines appeared in 1911, and the "No Left Turn" sign debuted in 1916
Today's Birthdays
1540 Joseph Justice Scaliger, proposed Julian dating
1604 John Eliot "Apostle to Indians," Bible translator
1624 William, Jamestown Va, 1st black child born in English America
1930 Neil Armstrong, X-15 pilot, 1st Moonwalker (Gemini 8, Apollo 11)
Thanks to The Quotations Page Famous Birthdays Snopes
Posted by Ranting Right Wing Howler
on 08/05/2004 at 07:36 AM
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Permalink • PEACE!!!!
Ladies and Gentlemen, loyal readers, valiant soldiers and defenders of the realm:I've just affixed my signature to an agreement with Caesar hereby ending all hostilities. The shields are down, the armies are dissolved, the automatic launch sequencers disabled.
Peace will reign upon our glorious lands!
Hail! Hail! Unto me!
Hail! Hail! Unto Caesar!
(we now resume our normal broadcasting.)
Posted by Ranting Right Wing Howler
on 08/05/2004 at 07:13 AM
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Permalink • Treaty Of Geneva
Peace at last. We have a treaty all ready for signing. Caesar has agreed to the terms presented. All that is left is Vilmar's signature and broadcasts will resume. Operation Rolling Thunder has been called off. South Flori-duh will be spared.Caesar has spoken.
Posted by The Skipper
on 08/05/2004 at 07:03 AM
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Permalink • Negotiations Update
I've just been informed by my key negotiators that progress is being made. This is good news. In consultation with Jesse and Al I've decided to make one final attempt at resolving this impasse.Despite the bluff and bluster displayed by Caesar, I've decided to truly display the benevolent side of my title, Benvolent Dictator, by agreeing to a power sharing arrangement where Caesar can live in his fantasy land of power and fame and
My negotiators will be meeting again this morning. We hope to have resolution shortly.
Loyal subjects, please continue to stand down. My missle defense shield is operational and will defend you from first strikes. Do not engage Caesar's forces unless you hear from me.The time may one day come to take action but we may forestall that date (and spare many lives) with succesful negotiations.
So I have spoken. So it shall be.
Posted by Ranting Right Wing Howler
on 08/05/2004 at 06:44 AM
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Permalink • Wednesday - August 04, 2004
Caesar: Final Offer
OK, Vilmar. This is the final offer.You may retain the title of "Benevolent Dictator" but you must pledge obeisance to Caesar.
Caesar will retire to Capua to write his books but holds ultimate authority over the blog .... to make sure you don't betray "the cause".
I will re-instate you into the Imperial Senate with full powers but you must pledge to honor Caesar and to never, NEVER recognize same-self marriages and disclose Kerry's bullshit wherevever you may find it.
That is my final offer. If you refuse there is a BLU-82 headed your way .....
Posted by The Skipper
on 08/04/2004 at 10:22 PM
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Permalink • Caesar: Liar, Liar, Pants On Fire
The "Benevolent Dictator" is lying through his teeth. As usual. I've had to keep the spammers at bay and manage the blog while he stabbed me in the back.It ain't over until it's over, fuckwad. Prepare to die or reach an accomodation.
You better talk to your negotiators, shithead.
Posted by The Skipper
on 08/04/2004 at 10:11 PM
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Permalink • I WILL NOT BE TRIFLED WITH!!
I am disappointed. I truly am. I expected so much more from my Minister of Propaganda.Well, I've about reached the end of my rope and can no longer allow my good name to be besmirched by individuals who, under the ruse of taking time off to lay about on beaches and do other recreational activities, goes to Boston to claim fame and glory by infiltrating enemy territory and then returns to prop himself up as something he is not---some self proclaimed Roman god.
I am, after all, the Benevolent Dictator.
Furthermore, as was so duly pointed out by one of my loyal subjects, I was left in complete control of this site, given total editing permissions, received all passwords and other privileges to all tasks related to posting on the blog. I was left with sole responsibility to keep all moonbat leftist lurkers AND junk mail artists AND site hijackers from infiltrating the site---and did so. Plus I provided excellent material to the readers and in my spare time ran the empire.
My thanks for this sacrifice? Accused of treachery. Accused of treason. Accused of attempting to steal the blog.
And now I find my Benevolent self threatened with shock and awe, aerial bombardments, invasions of my hallowed home.
I am left no choice but to summon the legions, artilleries, infantries, air support squadrons, bombing squadron, air interceptor squadrons, and amphibious assault battalions of my friends and colleagues currently still serving in the Air Force, Army, Navy AND Marines not only in the United States but in allied countries of Portugal, Israel, Germany, France, Italy, Switzerland, Belgium, Holland, South Africa, China and Brazil, (yes, Mr. Weasel Caesar, my service years were spent not just working with AF personnel but with the American sister services PLUS I did not waste my dinner parties, cocktail parties, Ambassadorial functions and arms trade lunches during my 6 years of Embassy duty in Europe just gripping and grinning.) A good Benevolent Dictator ALWAYS thinks ahead!
You want shock and awe? As they used to say, "you ain't seen nothin' yet!" so don't FUCK WITH ME!!
Now, that said, I think we might still be able to negotiate a peaceful solution to this. As such, I ask my loyal subjects to stand down for the time being.
However, faced with possible treachery, my forces WILL be on alert and can respond within minutes of my call (my comm gear is hardened against all attacks including nuclear and, OBTW, set to initiate attack and launch sequences if I do not countermand every 5 minutes so it will behoove everyone to counsel the Pretender, Caesar, from trying anything untoward until negotiations end.)
I am confident Jesse and Al will do a good job. They are street smart. I have faith in their ability to be able to convince Jimmah and Coffee Cake to have Caesar tone down his rhetoric and see the error of his ways. They will not demean the spirit and nature of these negotiations by offering anything as puerile as habitats or suntan oil. All they offer is an honest and gentlemanly solution to this matter---and as a byproduct of all this, will defacto allow Cease to keep his life and return to the fold and the warm embrace of his Benevolent Dictator.
I encourage Caesar to stand down his forces also while these negotiations are underway. A peaceful solution to this split can only benefit all concerned and I welcome an end to hostilities.
Talks will continue through the night and into the morning. Until then there will be a posting embargo in place.
I apologize for any inconvenience this may cause you, the loyal reader, but I see no other way to resolve this impasse.
Posted by Ranting Right Wing Howler
on 08/04/2004 at 10:01 PM
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Permalink • Caesar Strikes
While awaiting the "Benevolent Dictator"s reply to the ongoing negotiations, Caesar has decided to revoke all privileges on the blog site to Vilmar. He will be allowed to post but that is all.If he continues to hold out, I will embargo his barking-moonbat e-mail account next.
If his negotiators don't hurry up, I will be forced to take further drastic measures.
Posted by The Skipper
on 08/04/2004 at 08:31 PM
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Permalink • Caesar Is Outraged
Twice now, Vilmar has told Caesar to "BITE ME". This will not do. We are on the verge of Civil War here at BMEWS. It will be a bloody, horrible conflagration unless the two opposing forces, Caesar and the "Benevolent Dictator" can come to terms. Vilmar decided that, in my absence spying on the Loons in Boston, that he would make a power grab to take over BMEWS. His traitorous acts have only been allowed to proceed because Caesar had his hands full fighting the good fight against the evil Liberals in their own backyard while Vilmar sat here safely at BMEWS running his (big) mouth and stabbing Caesar in the back.All hail Caesar! By Imperial Decree, this blog is being shut down until this matter of treason is settled. We must settle our internal differences before we can continue to keep a wary eye on the Moonbats of the barbarian world.
Caesar has summoned his Imperial negotiators: Kofi Annen and Jimmy Carter. The so-called "Benevolent Dictator" has summoned his negotiators: Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton. At this moment the four are huddled in a spa in Switzerland trying to work out the terms.
In the meantime, Caesar has just finished cleaning his guns and is perusing the road map to South Flori-Duh, where the "Benevolent Dictator" resides in a slum on the southside of Miami. I have summoned four legions from the Alabama National Guard in the event negotiations fall through. I have eight full squadrons of F-117s warming up ready to show Vilmar what "shock and awe" is all about.
I will have satisfaction or I will have his head on a platter.
So let it be decreed to the Imperial Senate and to the entire Anti-Barking-Moonbat-Empire.
Give it up, Vilmar. Urge your negotiators to come to terms. I just heard that Carter proposed to build you a new habitat for humanity for you to live in and Kofi even threw in an offer to help you sell your embargoed suntan oil (for a small commission).
It's up to you, pissant ....
Posted by The Skipper
on 08/04/2004 at 08:02 PM
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Permalink • BMEWS EMPLOYMENT HOTLINE FLASH!
The Brits are employing again!!Yesterday I posted about how the Brits are looking for Roman Centurions, chicken sexers, etc.
Well, those crazy Brits are hiring even more people now: Court Jesters!
Anyone hear from the Annoying Little Twerp recently? (he smirks, he snickers, he ducks and runs like hell!)
Posted by Ranting Right Wing Howler
on 08/04/2004 at 04:48 PM
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Permalink • Sometime in the near future
Skip ahead just a few years. Health care reform passes---and everyone is entitled to health care, free medication, lipo-suction, botox, sex changes, breast enhancements, penis enlargements, etc. All on the tax payer dime. So we end up being a nation of big dicked and/or big breasted people with no wrinkles flip-flopping between the male and female genders (just for the hell of it, of course, as WE'RE not paying for it. Government is! Plus, it's your constitutional right!)So one day you fall down and rip a big gash in your leg. A quick trip to the emergency room finds you waiting in line for 24 hours behind moms with kids who have a sniffle, women with jock itch, men with yeast infections, and the occasional "man/woman" with both. Hey, your injury is not life threatening. So you wait.
Meanwhile, you develop an infection. While near the front of the line and you are the next to be seen you find out the staff went on a 24 hour strike for more pay and fewer hours. There will be another delay so a nurse checks you out, says you'll be OK. You show her the infection. She pulls out a bottle of maggots, drops them in your wound and walks away.
NICE, EH?
Seriously, though, maggots are making a comeback.
Posted by Ranting Right Wing Howler
on 08/04/2004 at 07:23 AM
Filed Under: • Outrageous •
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Permalink • Journalistic Diversity
Michelle Malkin found out the hard way that when journalists band together demanding diversity (in color, sex, religion, national origin) they may mean anyone who is non-white, female, with non-American born parentage. But anyone meeting that criteria who is Christian and conservative is SOL (shit outta luck) and need not apply.She calls them a
" herd of perpetually disgruntled minority journalists gather(ing) together to decry the lack of "diversity" in the media."
Black journalists decry lack of Blacks. Asians whine about not enough Asians. Hispanics demand more Hispanics.
But where is the room in this group of ethnicities for a conservative? Well, she tried to get herself represented. They ignored her phone calls.
Her conclusions?
The diversity they seek is, by definition, skin-deep. They call themselves "journalists of color." Not journalists of substance. Or journalists of integrity. Or journalists of independent thought
So, in abstentia, she devised a 20 question test for Media Diversity. Go read it. Then tell me how many journalists you know/are familiar with that'd get more than 20 points on this.
Posted by Ranting Right Wing Howler
on 08/04/2004 at 07:09 AM
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Permalink • Late Night Leno Humor
Welcome to "The Tonight Show”…help is on the way. You know this weekend John Kerry was yelling "help is on the way”, no I’m sorry that was Mike Tyson’s trainer trying to get him off the matt.On Friday, it was John Edwards wedding anniversary, Edwards, Kerry and their wives all stopped at a Wendy’s to eat. That’s a tradition with the Edwards to always go to Wendy’s on their anniversary because that’s where they went on their first date so they brought the Kerry’s with them. I don’t want to say that Kerry’s wife Teresa had never been to a Wendy’s before, but she ordered the pheasant.
Good news today in Boston, the balloons fell in Boston. Did you all see the problems they had with the balloons that were supposed to cascade down onto the stage after the democratic convention? Apparently they got held up. A stagehand was supposed to pull on the lever that dropped the balloons, but he didn’t do it. Finally Teresa Heinz had to get up there and yell at him "shove it…..just shove it.”
Bush – Cheney have a new campaign theme – "heart and soul”. I think that sounds better than their first choice – oil and gas.
In Malawi, Africa, a Catholic priest and a nun have been caught having sex in a car at the airport. A priest and a nun having sex in a car - this is the best news the Catholic Church has had in ten years.
A toilet manufacturer in Illinois has now come out with a line of reclining toilet seats. The seat is adjustable to 3 different lumbar positions. See, that’s when you know you’re spending too much time in the bathroom, when you’re on a lazy boy toilet!
In a stunning announcement, the Miss America pageant announced it is canceling the talent competition. You know what you call the Miss America contest without the talent? Hooters
Posted by Ranting Right Wing Howler
on 08/04/2004 at 06:43 AM
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Permalink • A Little About John Edwards
Looks like we have another bottom feeding, scum sucking weasel in the cheesepile. I wonder how long it will be before the mediaBack on Feb. 6, 2003, in an interview with John Edwards on Hardball w/Chris Matthews, the following exchange took place:
MATTHEWS: Would you go it alone in a war against Iraq if the U.N. finally decides not to back us? If the French, the Russians or the Chinese veto us, would you still go ahead and fight this war as the president seems to be heading to doing?
EDWARDS: I would go forward with the allies that we have with us, yes.
MATTHEWS: You'd go without the U.N.?
EDWARDS: Yes.
MATTHEWS: What's he doing wrong?
EDWARDS: With respect to Iraq specifically?
MATTHEWS: Yes.
EDWARDS: I think he's doing the right thing now with respect to Iraq. I think the secretary of state made the case eloquently yesterday at the United Nations. I think Saddam Hussein is a serious threat. He started a war, actually started two wars, he agreed to disarm, it's the only reason he's still in power. He's not disarmed, the evidence is overwhelming. You know this -- I spent a lot of time, as you know, in courtrooms. This is a powerful case and an easy case to make. This guy has to be disarmed. He cannot be allowed to get nuclear capability...
MATTHEWS: Right.
EDWARDS: ... and it requires military action, we should be willing to take military action.
MATTHEWS: So are you ready to go now to war? Have you got enough evidence as a senator from the United States, from this state, do you have enough evidence to support the United States going it alone right now, Iraq?
EDWARDS: Going forward with the allies who will support us, yes.
MATTHEWS: The war with Iraq?
EDWARDS: Yes, if we have -- this man has to be disarmed. If he doesn't do something to start disarming, then, yes we have to disarm him, and we should be willing to do it militarily.
MATTHEWS: OK, are you willing to take responsibility for all that entails?
EDWARDS: Yes.
Compare this to John Edwards' statement at his first joint campaign appearance with John Kerry:
"When John Kerry is president of the United States, no young American will ever go to war needlessly because America has decided to go it alone."
"The truth is, we, America - we need a president that will lead the world, not bully it."
(thanks, Ana)
Posted by Ranting Right Wing Howler
on 08/04/2004 at 06:37 AM
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Permalink • Five Most Recent Trackbacks:
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Not that very many people ever read this far down, but this blog was the creation of Allan Kelly and his friend Vilmar. Vilmar moved on to his own blog some time ago, and Allan ran this place alone until his sudden and unexpected death partway through 2006. We all miss him. A lot. Even though he is gone this site will always still be more than a little bit his. We who are left to carry on the BMEWS tradition owe him a great debt of gratitude, and we hope to be able to pay that back by following his last advice to us all:
It's been a long strange trip without you Skipper, but thanks for pointing us in the right direction and giving us a swift kick in the behind to get us going. Keep lookin' down on us, will ya? Thanks.
- Keep a firm grasp of Right and Wrong
- Stay involved with government on every level and don't let those bastards get away with a thing
- Use every legal means to defend yourself in the event of real internal trouble, and, most importantly:
- Keep talking to each other, whether here or elsewhere
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Oh, and here's some kind of visitor flag counter thingy. Hey, all the cool blogs have one, so I should too. The Visitors Online thingy up at the top doesn't count anything, but it looks neat. It had better, since I paid actual money for it.
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