Tuesday - October 10, 2006
The Book Of Babs
Chapter 21 - Return From The Wilderness
1- And on the four thousand three hundred eighty first day after The Diva wandered off in to the wilderness, vowing never to return, she appeared as though a vision before the multitude at Newyark.
2- And the people were blinded by the beauty of her voice and the cutting wit of The Diva and they fell to the ground worshipping at her feet as she basked in the glow of love and affection from the gathered tribes of Newyark.
3- But there arose a clamor from the sheeple when The Diva began a long, lengthy, boring comedy routine that was intended to poke fun of Emperor Bush, whom The Diva had declared to be sent from Satan years earlier.
4- The noise from the crowd threatened to overwhelm The Diva and her hypnotic voice and a mighty din arose in the multitude as their impatience grew with the stomping of feet and shouting of insults.
5- The Diva looked out upon the gathered sheeple and delivered a message of quiet moderation, saying to them in the holy tongue “Shut the fuck up! Shut up if you can’t take a joke!”
6- And lo, the sheeple were shamed and stood with heads bowed and the voices of the crowd of sheeple were silenced in dread fear of having offended The Diva and some pleaded with her to resume.
7- The Diva looked out upon the penitent gathering of unwashed poor and felt pity in her heart. She then sang to them to calm their fears and peace reigned over the gathering in Newyark.
8- But there was a great and evil plan brewing in the Emperor’s palace in Warshton that would ....
(From: “The Book Of Babs”, 21:1-8 — The rest of the text of this chapter of the Book Of Babs was lost in the First Islamic War Of 2008. Archeologists hope to one day find more copies in the rubble around Sanfrisco - Encyclopedia Britannica, 735th Edition, 2285 AD)
Posted by The Skipper
on 10/10/2006 at 02:00 PM
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Permalink • Prepare To Be Assimilated!
Forget North Korea. The fourth member of the Axis Of Evil, the Evil Borg Empire - Micro$oft, is preparing to take over your computer this month whether you like it or not. Internet Exploder 7 will be installed on our Windoze computer during the monthly automatic security updates.
If you have automatic updates turned on (and most of you do) then the evil deed will be done while you sleep. The Borgmaster, Bill Gates, has decreed it and you have no choice. Look not to the United Nations for help. The Borg Empire bought them years ago ....
IE7 Is Coming This Month...Are you Ready?
The final release of IE7 is fast approaching … and I mean really fast … and will be delivered to customers via Automatic Updates a few weeks after it’s available for download. We want to ensure that you are ready and the information below will help get you there.
Compatibility with sites, extensions and applications has been a very high priority for us as we develop new features, enhance the existing features and move the platform forward to be more secure and standards compliant. We are continually listening to feedback from our customers, partners and leaders in the industry to resolve major compatibility issues to ensure our common customers have a great experience with IE7.
As we make key improvements in areas such as layout and security, some changes need to be made by site owners to work smoothly with IE7. We have produced detailed documentation, tools and other resources to assist site, extension and application owners in their testing and development efforts to ensure they are compatible with IE7. We have also proactively worked with hundreds of companies to resolve issues that were reported through our beta testing to ensure those issues were resolved before IE7 is released.
Posted by The Skipper
on 10/10/2006 at 01:33 PM
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Permalink • PANIC AT DNC!
Eric Allie - Cagle Cartoons
Posted by The Skipper
on 10/10/2006 at 09:34 AM
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Permalink • Far East On Short Fuse
Uh-oh! Things are now starting to get a little bit out of hand in the Far East. It seems everyone is on pins and needles today as North Korea stepped up the saber-rattling and threatened to fire a nuclear missile - target not specified.
Even the Red Chinese are nervous. They have now decided to back off protecting the NoKo madman and are ready to smack “Dear Leader” with anything short of military action. Chinese and South Korean troops have had their leaves cancelled and everyone is on high alert. The Japanese are nervously watching developments and the UN is feverishly working to do what it usually does ... absolutely nothing substantial.
The US started withdrawing troops from South Korea two years ago and transferring them to Iraq. By my estimate, there are probably less than 28,000 US troops left to help the South Koreans if Kim Dung Ill goes crazy and starts a war.
Hold on to your hats, kids. Another member of the Axis of Evil is about to get the living crap kicked out of them unless the ChiComs can bring enough pressure to bear to avoid a bloodbath. Speaking of pressure ... I wonder where the Seventh Fleet is right about now ... ?
N. Korea Threatens to Fire Nuclear Missile If U.S. Won’t Commit to Talks
SEOUL, South Korea (FOX NEWS) - Tuesday, October 10, 2006North Korea stepped up its threats aimed at Washington, saying it could fire a nuclear-tipped missile unless the United States acts to resolve its standoff with Pyongyang, the Yonhap news agency reported Tuesday from Beijing.
Even if Pyongyang is confirmed to have nuclear weapons, experts say it’s unlikely the North has a bomb design small and light enough to be mounted atop a missile. Their long-range missile capability also remains in question, after a test rocket in July apparently fizzled out shortly after takeoff.
“We hope the situation will be resolved before an unfortunate incident of us firing a nuclear missile comes,” Yonhap quoted an unidentified North Korean official as saying. “That depends on how the U.S. will act.”
The official said the nuclear test was “an expression of our intention to face the United States across the negotiating table,” reported Yonhap, which didn’t say how or where it contacted the official, or why no name was given.
China’s patience with its longtime ally North Korea appeared to be wearing thin as Beijing warned Pyongyang that its staging of a nuclear test would harm the two countries’ relations. Fears of a new regional nuclear arms race eased when Japan’s leader said his nation still had no intention of seeking atomic weapons.
North Korea celebrated a holiday Tuesday marking the 61st anniversary of the Workers’ Party of Korea. There was no traffic across a key bridge on a border river between China and North Korea.
China Urges UN Action On North Korea
(BBC) - Tuesday, 10 October 2006, 12:20 GMT 13:20 UK
China has called for “appropriate” UN action over North Korea’s claim to have carried out a nuclear test on Monday. Beijing - traditionally Pyongyang’s closest ally - said it had not ruled out UN sanctions but that military action was “unimaginable”. The UN Security Council is considering a draft resolution that proposes strict financial and trade sanctions.
The US ambassador to the UN said while the US would not rule out using force, it was seeking a diplomatic solution. The South Korean Prime Minister, Han Myung-sook, said Seoul would not support a resolution including a threat of military force.
Russia, which like China has resisted sanctions in the past, has said it is “ready to take part in joint efforts of the interested parties to arrive at a peaceful, diplomatic settlement of the situation”.
The response of China - the country that holds the most influence over the isolated regime - is seen by many analysts to be key in moving the crisis forward. Chinese foreign ministry spokesman Liu Jianchao said: “This will no doubt have a negative impact on China and North Korea’s relations.”
He said the UN should take “appropriate action” but added that China was still considering the nature of that action. However, when asked what China thought of the possibility of military action, Mr Liu told a news conference: “I think this is an unimaginable way.”
North Korea’s neighbours remain tense in the wake of Monday’s announcement. China has reportedly cancelled leave for troops along part of its border with the North, and South Korean forces have been ordered to stay alert.
Posted by The Skipper
on 10/10/2006 at 07:43 AM
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Permalink • Barking Moonbat Hall Of Fame Inductee
Some stories just need no introduction and no explanation. This is one of those stories. In fact, this story just won’t go away no matter how hard we kick it. In fact, we are being forced to induct Ms. Wilbanks into the Barking Moonbat Hall Of Fame as a last ditch effort to convince this scatter-brained beeyatch to please just go away ... and stay away. I’m sure her ex-fiance feels the same way right about now. I would like to ask Ms. Wilbanks to keep her acceptance speech as short as possible ...
(AP) - Oct 10 7:47 AM US/Eastern
Jennifer Wilbanks, who became known as the “runaway bride” after taking off just days before her lavish wedding in 2005, is suing her former fiance for $500,000.
Wilbanks and John Mason broke up for good in May, about a year after her excursion to Las Vegas and New Mexico made international headlines while hundreds of friends and family members searched for her back home in suburban Atlanta.
Mason has until Oct. 22 to respond to the lawsuit, filed last month in Gwinnett County’s Superior Court. The suit, Wilbanks vs. JCM Consulting et al, was filed Sept. 13, according to court records.
In it, Wilbanks seeks $250,000 as her share of a home Mason purchased through the partnership with proceeds from $500,000 received for selling their story to an agent, plus $250,000 in punitive damages for allegedly abusing the power of attorney she granted for him to handle their financial affairs, according to Atlanta television station WAGA, which reported on the lawsuit Monday night.
She also seeks the return of personal property she claims he has kept. Wilbanks disappeared four days before her April 30, 2005, wedding. Hundreds of police and volunteers searched for her for three days before she called Mason from Albuquerque, N.M., claiming to have been abducted and sexually assaulted.
She later recanted, saying she fled because of unspecified personal issues, and pleaded no contest to telling police a phony story. She was sentenced to two years’ probation and performed community service that included mowing the lawns of public buildings.
Posted by The Skipper
on 10/10/2006 at 07:19 AM
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Permalink • Exploring The New World
In today’s editorial, Tom Purcell is confronted by his son, a product of the modern, politically-correct education system over Christopher Columbus and the result is an exercise in futility. It would also be quite funny if it weren’t so painfully close to what a lot of parents have to endure nowadays.
I wonder if this kid knows that in 1492, another momentous event took place in history ... the Spanish finally got around to driving the last of the Muslim invaders out of Europe for good. Well, at least for five hundred years anyway. Don’t look now but they’re back ... and our children are being taught that Columbus was an evil man ...
Mike Lane - The Baltimore Sun
- by Tom Purcell
“Dad, why does America celebrate Columbus Day?”
“Well, Billy, in 1492, Christopher Columbus sailed from Europe to America and founded the very first settlement in the New World. His arrival marks the beginning of America as we know it.”
“But didn’t he discover America by accident, dad?”
“Columbus believed the Earth was a sphere. He thought he could reach the Far East by setting off on a westward course. Though he stumbled upon what is now the Bahamas by accident, he was still a great explorer and a great man, Billy.”
“A great man, dad, or a racist oppressor?”
“Pardon me, son?”
“When Columbus came to America, he brought with him the greed of the white European males who subsequently colonized America for the dough. They fought and killed the Indigenous Peoples who were already here and took their land and their gold. Columbus eventually died a very rich man.”
“Well, Billy, an unfortunate part of human history involves countries invading their neighbors to take control. This has happened in many parts of the world, including Europe, which has a long history of war. But remember that Indigenous Peoples were also prone to war and fighting to expand their control well before Europeans arrived.”
“Well, Columbus is also responsible for many germs and diseases that Europeans brought to America, causing untold suffering and death among the people who were here before us.”
“Have you been drinking too much caffeine lately, Billy?”
“America’s history of environmental destruction can also be laid at Columbus’ feet, dad. As soon as the Europeans colonized America’s pristine lands, they cut down the trees and plowed up the fields. Can you say soil erosion, dad?”
“Son, did I ever tell you that you take after your mother’s side?”
“And what about slavery? It was the Europeans who created a flourishing slave trade in America. They did it to develop the land cheaply, so they could make giant profits. Columbus even made slaves out of some of the Indigenous Peoples who attacked him and his men.”
“Son, do you remember where your mother hid the bourbon?”
“I’ll tell you another thing, dad. Some people believe the only reason we even celebrate Columbus Day is because he was Italian, and the day is also a celebration of Italian heritage. Some believe that when FDR made Columbus Day official in 1934, he did so not just because Columbus discovered the New World, but because Italian immigrants in America represented millions of votes.”
“Look, Billy, there are a lot of ways to look at what Christopher Columbus symbolizes. You can focus on the negative attributes, and there are some, or you can do what America has been doing for many years now: focus on the positive.”
“Positive, dad?”
“Sure, Billy. Columbus represents the spirit of exploration, the spirit of pushing forward into the great unknown to find greater and better things. This has always been the spirit of America, the land of innovation and new ideas.”
“What kind of ideas, dad?”
“How about the ideas of freedom and self-government, Billy? After Columbus opened a gateway to the New World, other European countries established colonies here, too. Eventually, some amazing historical figures would evolve in North America. They would create and fight for a way of life that has proved to be extremely successful - their ideas are still spreading and changing the world for the better.”
“Really, dad?”
“Yes, son. The concept of freedom has taken root so solidly in America that people are free to criticize or praise anything, including whether or not Christopher Columbus was a hero or an ogre, or whether or not Columbus Day should still be celebrated in America. Now, do you have any other questions about history?”
“Sure, dad. Was Benjamin Franklin really a predatory male chauvinist womanizer?”
Tom Purcell’s weekly political humor column runs in newspapers and Web sites across America. Contact him at TomPurcell@aol.com. Distributed by Cagle Cartoons syndicate, call Cari Dawson Bartley at 800 696 7561 for reprint info.
Posted by The Skipper
on 10/10/2006 at 06:53 AM
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Permalink • Take Your Oil And Shove It
“Keep Your Oil”
ANCHORAGE, Alaska (AP) - 9:09 p.m. EDT, October 9, 2006
In Alaska’s native villages, the punishing winter cold is already penetrating the walls of the lightly insulated plywood homes, many of the villagers are desperately poor, and heating-oil prices are among the highest in the nation.
And yet a few of the small communities want to refuse free heating oil from Venezuela, on the patriotic principle that no foreigner has the right to call their president “the devil.”
The heating oil is being offered by the petroleum company controlled by Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez, President Bush’s nemesis. While scores of Alaska’s Eskimo and Indian villages say they have no choice but to accept, others would rather suffer.
“As a citizen of this country, you can have your own opinion of our president and our country. But I don’t want a foreigner coming in here and bashing us,” said Justine Gunderson, administrator for the tribal council in the Aleut village of Nelson Lagoon. “Even though we’re in economically dire straits, it was the right choice to make.”
Nelson Lagoon residents pay more than $5 a gallon for oil—or at least $300 a month per household—to heat their homes along the wind-swept coast of the Bering Sea, where temperatures can dip to minus-15. About one-quarter of the 70 villagers are looking for work, in part because Alaska’s salmon fishing industry has been hit hard by competition from fish farms.
The donation to Alaska’s native villages has focused attention on the rampant poverty and high fuel prices in a state that is otherwise awash in oil—and oil profits. In 2005, 86 percent of the Alaska’s general fund, or $2.8 billion, came from oil from the North Slope.
The Aleutian Pribilof Islands Association, a native nonprofit organization that would have handled the heating oil donation on behalf of 291 households in Nelson Lagoon, Atka, St. Paul and St. George, rejected the offer because of the insults Chavez has hurled at Bush.
Dimitri Philemonof, president and chief executive of the association, said accepting the aid would be “compromising ourselves.” “I think we have some duty to our country, and I think it’s loyalty,” he said.
Over the past two years, Citgo, the Venezuelan government’s Texas-based oil subsidiary, has given millions of gallons of discounted heating oil to the poor in several states and cities—including New York, Connecticut, Vermont, Rhode Island, Massachusetts and Maine—in what is widely seen as an effort by Chavez to embarrass and irritate the U.S. government and make himself look good.
Maine Gov. John Baldacci, who approved an agreement last winter to buy discounted oil, said he had no plans this year to seek a similar arrangement. In Boston, Massachusetts, a City Council member wants a landmark Citgo sign near Fenway Park taken down and replaced with an American flag. In Florida, a lawmaker asked the state to cancel Citgo’s exclusive contract to sell fuel at turnpike service stations.
About 150 native villages in Alaska have accepted money for heating oil from Citgo. The oil company does not operate in Alaska, so instead of sending oil, it is donating about $5.3 million to native nonprofit organizations to buy 100 gallons this winter for each of more than 12,000 households.
Posted by The Skipper
on 10/10/2006 at 01:00 AM
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Permalink • Monday - October 09, 2006
Readers Poll: Korean Kooks
“Attention Deficit Disorder” -by- Cox & Forkum
Cast your vote in our “Response Poll”!
Posted by The Skipper
on 10/09/2006 at 11:30 PM
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Permalink • Democratic Response
“While we’ve been bogged down in Iraq where there were no weapons of mass destruction, a madman has apparently tested the ultimate weapon of mass destruction.”
-- Senator John Kerry (D-MA)
“The Democrats need to take a deep breath and realize that this is not about the election, and that Americans don’t want anyone playing partisan politics with the threat of nuclear weapons. Rather than attack the president, we ought to be coming together to support his efforts to protect America.”
-- Rep. Mitch McConnell (R-KY)
Posted by The Skipper
on 10/09/2006 at 10:46 PM
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Permalink • Through The Looking Glass
“The Great Famine Of 2006”
Korea Liberator Blog
Posted by The Skipper
on 10/09/2006 at 03:42 PM
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Permalink • Lunatic Of The Day
Baby As Weapon
ERIE, Pa. -October 9, 2006, 2:39 PM EDT
A woman used her 4-week-old baby as a weapon in a domestic dispute, swinging the infant through the air and striking her boyfriend with the child, authorities said.
The boy was in serious but stable condition Monday at Children’s Hospital in Pittsburgh, police said.
“Never, never, never. I can never remember anything like this,” District Attorney Bradley Foulk told the Erie Times-News.
Chytoria Graham, 27, of Erie, was charged with aggravated assault, reckless endangerment and simple assault. She was held Monday in the Erie County Jail in lieu of $75,000 bail.
The infant, whose name was not released, suffered a fractured skull and some bleeding in the brain, authorities said. His head hit Graham’s boyfriend, the baby’s father, police Lt. Dan Spizarny said.
Authorities removed four other children from Graham’s home and placed them with the Erie County Office of Children and Youth, Foulk said.
Posted by The Skipper
on 10/09/2006 at 03:15 PM
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Permalink • Quote Of The Day
“The dollar rose to a seven-month high against the yen after the reports but analysts did not expect long-term fallout unless the situation deteriorated further.”
-- Reuters, October 9, 2006 - ”North Korea Says Conducted Nuclear Test”
Posted by The Skipper
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Permalink • NoKo Nuke
SEOUL (Reuters) - Mon Oct 9, 2006 12:22am ET
North Korea said on Monday it had safely and successfully carried out an underground nuclear test in a gesture of defiance as Japanese Prime Minister Shinzo Abe arrived in South Korea.
“The nuclear test was conducted with indigenous wisdom and technology 100 percent,” North Korea’s Korean Central News Agency said.
“It marks a historic event as it greatly encouraged and pleased the KPA (Korean People’s Army) and people that have wished to have powerful self-reliant defense capability.”
The report said there was no leak or danger from the test. The U.N. Security Council last Friday urged North Korea not to carry out a test, warning Pyongyang of unspecified consequences if it did.
A U.S. official said North Korea gave China a 20-minute warning of its test and China immediately told the United States, Japan and South Korea.
North Korea announced last week it would test a nuclear device saying its hand was forced by what it called U.S. threats of nuclear war and economic sanctions. But it said it would not be the first to use a nuclear weapon.
Analysts say North Korea probably has enough fissile material to make six to eight nuclear bombs but probably does not have the technology to devise one small enough to mount on a missile.
Iran Refuses To Suspend Atomic Work
TEHRAN (Reuters) - Sun Oct 8, 12:27 PM ET
Iran insisted on Sunday that it would not suspend sensitive atomic work despite signs that world powers were close to agreeing on sanctions against Tehran. “We believe that suspension is totally rejected and is unacceptable,” Foreign Ministry spokesman Mohammad Ali Hosseini said.
Some media reports had suggested Iran may be prepared to freeze atomic fuel manufacturing work for 90 days to allow direct negotiations with the United States and other major world powers to take place.
But Hosseini dismissed the reports. “It (the temporary suspension) has never been part of our policy and it will not be part of it.” Iran says its nuclear program will be used only for peaceful purposes and not, as the United States alleges, to make atomic weapons.
The United States, Russia, China, France, Britain and Germany agreed in London on Friday to discuss possible U.N. Security Council sanctions to punish Iran for failing to heed demands to halt uranium enrichment.
Iran says it wants to master uranium enrichment to make nuclear reactor fuel for electricity generation. But the same process can also be used to make bomb-grade fuel.
“Using the language of threats and force against Iran will have no results,” President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad was quoted by Iran’s Fars News Agency as saying. “Iran is interested in dialogue and talks to resolve its nuclear issue,” the president said.
Western diplomats say Iran has been pushing for more talks as a stalling tactic, in order to avoid taking action.
Posted by The Skipper
on 10/09/2006 at 12:28 AM
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Permalink • The Boys Of October
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on 10/09/2006 at 12:17 AM
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Permalink • Five Most Recent Trackbacks:
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Not that very many people ever read this far down, but this blog was the creation of Allan Kelly and his friend Vilmar. Vilmar moved on to his own blog some time ago, and Allan ran this place alone until his sudden and unexpected death partway through 2006. We all miss him. A lot. Even though he is gone this site will always still be more than a little bit his. We who are left to carry on the BMEWS tradition owe him a great debt of gratitude, and we hope to be able to pay that back by following his last advice to us all:
It's been a long strange trip without you Skipper, but thanks for pointing us in the right direction and giving us a swift kick in the behind to get us going. Keep lookin' down on us, will ya? Thanks.
- Keep a firm grasp of Right and Wrong
- Stay involved with government on every level and don't let those bastards get away with a thing
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- Keep talking to each other, whether here or elsewhere
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Oh, and here's some kind of visitor flag counter thingy. Hey, all the cool blogs have one, so I should too. The Visitors Online thingy up at the top doesn't count anything, but it looks neat. It had better, since I paid actual money for it.
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