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Sarah Palin will pry your Klondike bar from your cold dead fingers.

calendar   Thursday - September 29, 2005

Riddle Me This

I’m currently suffering from an intestinal infection and am stoked up on antibiotics and pain-killers. It’s been gradually wearing me down for the last few days and I finally gave up and saw my doc yesterday. It’ll get better now that I’m taking care of it. I plan to spend a lot of time today sleeping under the influence of good drugs (legal, prescribed ones that is). For your amusement, I present the picture below. Your job is to guess what it is. This is an Open Forum Post so feel free to discuss whatever comes to your mind. I will leave it to Oink to direct traffic ....

What Is This?

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Posted by The Skipper   United States  on 09/29/2005 at 01:55 PM   
Filed Under: • Fun-StuffPersonal •  
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Light Posting Day

Notice: The Skipper’s under the weather today and will be in his cabin until further notice, so expect light posting for today.  I will put some items up as I get to them, but work being a zoo this week, I may not get to too many.  That is all.


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Posted by Drew458   United States  on 09/29/2005 at 11:48 AM   
Filed Under: • Miscellaneous •  
Comments (3) Trackbacks(0)  Permalink •  

Well, I’ll be

The FBI has released it’s ”Uniform Crime Reports” for 2004. You know, the year that the evil Assault Weapons Ban was expired.  Remember how we were told by the like of Barbara *spit* Boxer and her ilk that there would be pitched battles in the streets?  Remember how we were told that every minor traffic altercation would end in death for someone?  Hmmmmm.

This is the table that shows, in total, the percentage change in various crimes compared to the last report:

Population
Group
Number of
Agencies
PopulationViolent
Crime
MurderForcible
Rape
RobberyAggravated
Assault
Total12,715258,000,968-1.7-3.6-0.3-3.6-0.8


A 3.6% drop in both murder and robbery. [scratching head] What could be the cause of that?


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Posted by Drew458   United States  on 09/29/2005 at 11:10 AM   
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Kowabunga

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Nick Anderson, Kentucky—The Louisville Courier-Journal


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Posted by The Skipper   United States  on 09/29/2005 at 07:24 AM   
Filed Under: • Humor •  
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Rematch

imageimage DAN RATHER WANTS SECOND GO AT BUSH
(NEW YORK POST)

Dan Rather wants to reopen the investigation into President Bush and the National Guard story that resulted in the Memogate scandal and led to his early departure from the anchor desk but his bosses at CBS have forbidden him to go back at it, he said.

“CBS News doesn’t want me to do that story,” Rather said during an interview that aired on C-SPAN Monday night. “They wouldn’t let me do that story,” he said during the shockingly frank interview with former NBC newsman Marvin Kalb. Rather continues to insist that the story was correct and suggested in the interview that he and the network may have been set up by some outsider.

“There are some strange, and to me, still mysterious things,” he said. “Certainly unexplained things that happened about how it got attacked and why, even before the program was over,” Rather said. The report, delivered by Rather last September, was discredited two weeks later after drawing fire, first from politically conservative Web logs and later from mainstream media who reported that the “60 Minutes 2” story was based on forged documents. Rather retired from the “CBS Evening News” last spring. Some, including CBS chief Les Moonves, have suggested that Rather might have stayed on for at least another year had he not been embroiled in the scandal.

“I believed in the story,” Rather said. “The facts of the story were correct. One supporting pillar of the story, albeit an important one, one supporting pillar was brought into question,” he said. “To this day, no one has proven whether it was what it purported to be or not.”

I compare Dan Rather to a bad case of syphilis (thankfully, a disease I’ve never had). He just comes and goes in stages, always making a bloody nuisance out of himself and totally screwing up things for everyone like a pus-filled growth. Like syphilis, Dan is in the final stages as evidenced by the total brain rot that is beginning to set in. Is there no cure for this disease? Can’t we just inject him with some new miracle drug that hopefully will return the man’s brain to reality or would we be better served to just quarantine his butt into a nice retirement home in North Korea perhaps? Personally, I opt for the latter solution. Dear Dan and Dear Leader have a lot in common ... neither one has a functioning brain and both have delusions of grandeur and schizophrenic tendencies.

.... and yes, I know the picture above is upside-down. It is the only way I can look at Danny Boy these days without tossing my cookies. He is an STD ... Stoopid Transmitted Disease and I don’t want to get infected. Now go wash your eyes before reading the other posts below ...


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Posted by The Skipper   United States  on 09/29/2005 at 05:08 AM   
Filed Under: • Media-BiasStoopid-People •  
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A Thousand Words

They say a picture is worth a thousand words. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. BARF .. There! I’ve got it started. Feel free to add your own “words” in the comments ...

image

(-- Our thanks (?) to Rancino for sending us this disgusting picture. My e-mail InBox is being disinfected as I speak.)


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Posted by The Skipper   United States  on 09/29/2005 at 12:54 AM   
Filed Under: • Democrats-Liberals-Moonbat LeftistsOdd-StrangeStoopid-People •  
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calendar   Wednesday - September 28, 2005

Kennedy Offers Assistance

Plugging The Dyke

Shocked by the widespread suffering of those displaced from their homes by the flooding in New Orleans following Hurricane Katrina, Senator Edward Kennedy (D-Mass.) offered to plug one of the holes in the Lake Pontchartrain levee with his own ample body.

“The Bush Administration had failed to stem the tide of this cataclysm,” said Kennedy. “I have had some experience with aquatic mishaps. This experience will bolster me in the hours of desperation had I plugged one of the leaks myself.”

Kennedy had arranged to have the Air Force transport him by helicopter and lower him into the easternmost breach in the levee. The hope was that the senator’s doughy frame be pliable enough to conform to the hole’s dimensions and halt or, at least slow, the flow of water from the lake into the city.

President Bush praised Senator Kennedy’s decision. “I think it’s mighty big of him to offer so much for the good of the country,” said Bush. “There aren’t many who could fill such a large role in this disaster.”

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(-- Our thanks to A1Goose for this update)


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Posted by The Skipper   United States  on 09/28/2005 at 10:41 PM   
Filed Under: • Democrats-Liberals-Moonbat LeftistsHumor •  
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Democrats And Buses

Free Republic has an excellent post about buses in New Orleans and how the Democrats use them and how they don’t use them. Good read ....

Flashback to 1996: A Day When Buses Were Used in New Orleans
Baton Rouge Advocate | Nov. 10, 1996

NEW ORLEANS - Red beans, parades and a thousand people all were part of the push that got nearly 186,000 voters to New Orleans polls on Election Day and gave Democrat Mary Landrieu a U.S. Senate victory. Republican Louis “Woody” Jenkins has refused to concede defeat to Landrieu, who had an unofficial 5,899-vote lead after voting machines were opened Friday. The statewide tally released by the secretary of state on Friday was Landrieu 853,076, Jenkins 847,177, the closest Senate election in Louisiana history. Campaign manager Tony Perkins said volunteers will be working all weekend, checking out hundreds of complaints - especially in New Orleans, where Landrieu led Jenkins 143,050 to 42,653.

Bob Tucker, a businessman and close advisor to New Orleans Mayor Marc Morial, said it was Morial’s get-out-the-vote teams that won the day for Landrieu, President Clinton and Orleans Parish Leader Harry Connick. “All elections begin and end in the streets on election day. That’s where the Clinton, Landrieu and Connick team won Tuesday,” Tucker said. For instance, when the management team got word at 3:15 p.m. Tuesday that a GOP tracking poll showed Jenkins ahead, it was time for an instant parade. “Within 45 minutes, we arranged a motorcade,” Tucker said. “We found Mary and Marc, got school buses for workers and sound trucks with music and put on a parade to flush out our voters.” Landrieu and Morial waved from campaign manager Norma Jane Sabiston’s convertible.

“We moved them into the major housing project areas blowing horns and playing New Orleans music,” Tucker said. “We were doing what we do best in New Orleans, having a parade.” There were more parades in key areas during “surge time” - late afternoon and evening, when people get off work. Tucker’s teams tracked the turnout all day in target precincts. If the vote was slow compared to past elections, some of the 1,000 street workers were sent there to knock on doors and ask people to vote. A phone bank worked all day, asking voters to go to the polls.

The street workers were divided into two groups of 500 -one for the morning, and one for the afternoon. Those were split into four groups: One to work polling places; one to wave signs at intersections; one to go door-to-door; and one to go to shopping centers and employment centers. The one time all were together was at lunch, when all 1,000 got a lunch of red beans and rice.

Now you know. When Dummycraps in New Orleans need votes, the school buses run. When the city is flooding and the people who voted for them are drowning or starving, the buses stayed parked. End of lesson.


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Posted by The Skipper   United States  on 09/28/2005 at 05:01 PM   
Filed Under: • Democrats-Liberals-Moonbat LeftistsOutrageous •  
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Why Me?

I just received this picture in an e-mail from an anonymous source (anonymouse@gmail.com - whoever that is). What I want to know is who sent it and why? What kind of ignorant Moonbat would dare clutter up the internet (much less my InBox) with this ... this ... this ... whatever! Somebody out there has some real explaining to do. I only hope it wasn’t Oink behind this ... this ... this ... AARRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH, MY EYES!

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Posted by The Skipper   United States  on 09/28/2005 at 01:51 PM   
Filed Under: • Insanity •  
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Broken Record

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Posted by The Skipper   United States  on 09/28/2005 at 10:33 AM   
Filed Under: • HumorMedia-Bias •  
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Nightcap

imageimageBill Clinton was walking along the beach when he stumbled upon a Genie’s lamp. He picked it up and rubbed it and lo-and-behold, a Genie appeared. Bill was amazed and asked if he got three wishes.

The Genie said, “Nope...Due to inflation, constant downswing, low wages in third world countries, and fierce global competition, I can only grant you one wish. So...What’ll it be?”

Bill didn’t hesitate. He said, “I want to be remembered for bringing peace to the Middle East, instead of that other stuff with Monica, and Jennifer, and the rest of those women. See this map? I want these countries to stop fighting with each other.”

The Genie looked at the map of the Middle East and exclaimed, “Jeez, Fella! These people have been at war for thousands of years. I’m good, but not THAT good. I don’t think it can be done. Make another wish.”

Bill thought for a minute and said, “You know, people really don’t like my wife. Even though she got elected, they call her a carpetbagger. They think she’s mean, ugly, and pushes me around. I wish for her to be the most beautiful woman in the world and I want everybody to like her. That’s what I want.”

The Genie let out a long sigh and said, “Lemme see that map again.”


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Posted by The Skipper   United States  on 09/28/2005 at 04:15 AM   
Filed Under: • HildabeastHumor •  
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Most Ridiculous Item Of The Day

Some news stories require no comment. Others require a lot of thought and insight to prepare the reader. This news story requires none of the above. All this story requires is a nice seat in an electric chair and about 20,000,000 volts run through it until the smoking ashes are all that remains ....

imageimageLaci Peterson Life Insurance Hearing Set
MODESTO, Calif. (AP)

A judge on Tuesday set an Oct. 21 court date to decide who will collect Laci Peterson’s $250,000 life insurance policy. Sharon Rocha, the mother of the slain pregnant teacher, has petitioned the court for the money. But Scott Peterson’s attorney, Mark Geragos, won’t give up his client’s claim to the money until he has exhausted appeals of his conviction in her murder.

Rocha’s attorney, Adam Stewart, said Tuesday after a brief court hearing that it could take “a quarter of a century to find out whether he’s exonerated or put to death.” A telephone call to Geragos was not immediately returned. Peterson was convicted and sentenced to death last year for killing his pregnant wife and the fetus she carried. He maintains his innocence. A $25 million wrongful death lawsuit filed against Scott Peterson by Laci Peterson’s family is set for trial April 4.


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Posted by The Skipper   United States  on 09/28/2005 at 03:18 AM   
Filed Under: • CrimeOutrageous •  
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Angels With Meth

Once more, we find out that we weren’t told the entire truth at the time. It seems the hostage had a lot of help from God and even more help from a stash of meth ....

imageimageHostage Gave Meth to Atlanta Fugitive
ATLANTA (AP)

Ashley Smith, the woman who says she persuaded suspected courthouse gunman Brian Nichols to release her by talking about her faith, discloses in a new book that she gave him methamphetamine during the hostage ordeal. Smith did not share that detail with authorities at the time. But investigators said she came clean about the drugs when they interviewed her months later. They said they have no plans to charge her with drug possession.

In her book, “Unlikely Angel,” released Tuesday, Smith says Nichols had her bound on her bed with masking tape and an extension cord. She says he asked for marijuana, but she did not have any, and she dug into her illegal stash of crystal meth instead. Smith, a 27-year-old widowed mother who gained widespread praise for her level-headedness, says the seven-hour hostage ordeal in March led to the realization that she was a drug addict, and she says she has not used drugs since the night before she was taken captive.

“If I did die, I wasn’t going to heaven and say, ‘Oh, excuse me, God. Let me wipe my nose, because I just did some drugs before I got here,’” Smith told the Augusta Chronicle. Police said Nichols took Smith hostage in her apartment March 11 after a shooting rampage at the Atlanta courthouse. During the ordeal, Smith says, she pulled out Rick Warren’s book “The Purpose-Driven Life” and read to Nichols a chapter called “Using What God Gave Me” to gain his trust. Nichols later released her, and she called 911 and told authorities where to find him.

Nichols is accused of killing four people, including a judge, and could get the death penalty. Since Nichols’ arrest, Smith has received $70,000 in rewards and has been bombarded with offers for books, movies and speaking engagements. Her ordeal has been held up as an example of the redemptive power of faith. “It’s hard for people to understand the miracle of the story,” she told the newspaper. “This was totally a God thing, to me in my life. This was God getting my attention, going, ‘I’m going to give you one more chance.’”

Financial details of the book have not been released, but Smith pledged to donate an undisclosed portion of the book’s proceeds to a memorial fund for the victims. Calls to Nichols’ attorneys were not immediately returned Tuesday. Prosecution spokesman Erik Friedly would not comment on the case.


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Posted by The Skipper   United States  on 09/28/2005 at 02:43 AM   
Filed Under: • Crime •  
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SCOTUS To Decide Bimbo vs. Money

Judge John Roberts goes through the agonizing nomination process to get appointed to the Supreme Court and what is one of the first cases he gets to preside over? I’m glad you asked. He (and the other justices) get to decide if a blonde bimbo gets to keep her share of her dead sugar daddy’s money. That’s right. The Supreme Court of the United States has nothing better to do than decide if Anna Nichole Smith gets paid off for humping an 89-year-old man in his final years. I’m flabbergasted ....

imageimageAnna Nicole’s Case Goes to Supreme Court
WASHINGTON (AP)

The Supreme Court shed its staid image Tuesday, giving stripper-turned Playboy model Anna Nicole Smith a new chance at a piece of the fortune of her 90-year-old late husband. The court said it would hear arguments early next year as part of Smith’s effort to collect as much as $474 million from the estate of J. Howard Marshall II. The oil tycoon married her in 1994 when he was 89 and she was 26. The case promises to be the sexiest of the nine-month term which begins next week.

“She’s very excited. She will be attending arguments, there’s no question about that,’’ Smith’s lawyer, Howard K. Stern, said in a telephone interview from Vermont where the television reality star is filming a movie. At issue for the court is a relatively mundane technical issue: when may federal courts hear claims that are also involved state probate proceedings. But the facts are eye-catching. The 1993 Playmate of the Year and self-described ``blonde bombshell’’ claims her husband promised her millions but that his scheming son cut her out of the estate.

The son, E. Pierce Marshall, said that a Texas court had found Smith’s claim frivolous and that a jury determined he did nothing wrong. ``This is one small step in a process and we intend to prevail so that my father’s wishes can be honored,’’ he said in a statement. His father, one of Texas’ wealthiest men, died in 1995, setting off a nasty legal fight. An initial $474 million award for Smith was reduced to about $89 million, then thrown out altogether by the 9th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals in San Francisco. The appeals court said that a Texas probate court’s decision that the oilman’s son was his sole heir should stand.

The appeals court decision, that federal courts in California never had jurisdiction, erased a lower court finding that she was entitled to compensatory and punitive damages on grounds that Marshall’s son tried to keep her from receiving money from his father’s estate. Smith, whose real name is Vickie Lynn Marshall, had received more than $6 million in gifts from her late husband, but was not included in his will, justices were told by E. Pierce Marshall’s attorneys.

Smith’s attorneys told justices in a filing that Marshall’s son “devotes nearly half his brief to manipulating the record to cast (Vickie) in a bad light,’’ and that J. Howard Marshall intended to provide for his wife throughout her life. The Supreme Court agreed to hear the case without awaiting the opinion of the new chief justice. The Senate is expected to vote on John Roberts’ nomination later this week. The eight justices, including retiring Justice Sandra Day O’Connor, picked that case to hear out of about 1,900 appeals.

The case is Vickie Lynn Marshall v. E. Pierce Marshall, 04-1544.

Forget the Ten Commandments and Roe v. Wade. This is more important, right?


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Posted by The Skipper   United States  on 09/28/2005 at 02:07 AM   
Filed Under: • InsanityJudges-Courts-Lawyers •  
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Not that very many people ever read this far down, but this blog was the creation of Allan Kelly and his friend Vilmar. Vilmar moved on to his own blog some time ago, and Allan ran this place alone until his sudden and unexpected death partway through 2006. We all miss him. A lot. Even though he is gone this site will always still be more than a little bit his. We who are left to carry on the BMEWS tradition owe him a great debt of gratitude, and we hope to be able to pay that back by following his last advice to us all:
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