Monday - September 06, 2004

News Bytes 06-Sep-2004

John Kerry today slammed President Bush, calling the situation in Iraq, “The wong war in the wrong place at the wrong time”. The Senator went on to say he’d bring troops home within four years.

President Bush replied back that Senator Kerry is the “wrong waffle in the wrong party in the wrong universe”. Bush went on to describe Kerry’s various positions .... more than there are in the Kama Sutra. Indeed.

Meanwhile, the Russians started mourning the deaths of over 350 children and teachers who were murdered in the most recent “peaceful” protest by members of “The Religion Of Peace”. Their children were in the wrong school at the wrong time with the wrong Muslims.

In New York, Bill Clinton is recovering from a successful quadruple bypass. I wish him a speedy recovery so he can go home to Hillary .. who is the wrong woman in the wrong country with the wrong goals. Bill, I feel your pain.

In Red China, the country’s leaders have decided to crack down on pornography. If your site has 250,000 visitors and you have nekkid women on it, you can get life in prison. And the Democrats think John Ashcroft is harsh? The Red Chinese are suddenly attacking the wrong nekkid people in the wrong internet in the wrong century.

In a related story, half of all internet e-mail in Red China is spam. Spam .. nekkid commisars? I ain’t touching that one with a ten foot chopstick. It’s the wrong joke about the wrong food at the wrong time of day.

And finally, after college football’s opening weekend, LSU drops from 4th to 6th after nearly losing to Oregon State. After watching them play Saturday night I think they should have dropped further. They were the wrong team playing the wrong game with the wrong pre-season hype.

Posted by The Skipper     on 09/06/2004 at 04:55 PM   
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When It Rains It Pours

According to legend, there is a butterfly in Africa who mysteriously flaps his wings, creating a small breeze, and this breeze grows and grows and moves across the Atlantic as a hurricane with devastating winds.

We are hereby placing a bounty of $100 trillion (US) on that damned butterfly’s head, dead or alive. Contact the BMEWS Secretary Of War to collect your reward when you have destroyed that bastard.

Three of these monsters within a single two-week period is way too much. That damned butterfly must die!

Posted by The Skipper     on 09/06/2004 at 03:18 PM   
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Using Restraint In Hopes of Staying Out of Jail

This one is so rich with possibilities but I know if I go into some of them the FBI will knock on my door.

So I will let you figure it out.

Read this and wonder what “might” be.

Posted by Ranting Right Wing Howler     on 09/06/2004 at 08:43 AM   
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Update From The West Coast (part 2)

Well, boys and girls, I’m back----temporarily, anyway.

Yesterday about noon the power went out.  It’s amazing how used you get to certain things:  like expecting the fridge light to come on or walking into the bathroom and flicking the switch to find nothing happens.

Anyway, I felt like a druggie going through withdrawals.  No TV, radio had the same stuff over and over, internet--not hardly likely (unless I owned a laptop--which might be a future purchase for just such an occasion as the phones almost always work.)

So........my parents still have power this morning.  Went there for breakfast and decided to go back to the house, pack up the ‘puter and look to see what is going on.

It blew all day yesterday and the eye went over Tampa last night at 7 PM. Things got quiet for a couple of hours and then the winds changed direction.  My yard looks like the trees decided to take huge shits all over it.  Branches and leaves al over.  It will take me a couple of days of solid raking to clear it all (and then I have to deal with the refuse!) The canal behind my house is getting higher and higher. Fortunately we’ve only had 7 inches of rain ( the buckets stage as defined in an earlier post.

Last night the winds started in on us from the south and the plants are now dancing the cha-cha-cha south to north.  If it stays consistent they may straighten up from their “lean” yesterday.

Since the storm is so huge and tropical storm force winds extending almost 200 miles from the eye, we expect winds and rain until mid-afternoon.  Power won’t come back for probably another 24-36 hours.  Hopefully those without power won’t lose too much stuff in their freezers.  I just switched my ice containers in order to preserve it as cold as possible.

So, all in all, things are well here.  Folks are starting to grumble and it irritates me that these people lacks so much understanding for the situation we are facing. Example:  one guy calls in to the radio station complaining that he was without power but knew that 2 local county commissioners were still with electricity.  He then went on to allude that since they were commissioners they had “inside” help to stay on the grid.  What this stupid fuck failed to understand is that 75% of the county is out and where my parents live (and where the 2 other commissioners live, they still have power.) Of course, this fucknuts never said anything about the other 3 commissioners without lights.  He expected the power company to be out in 60 MPH winds re-rigging wires so he could have his TV and coffee pot. 

These are the sort of people that if we ever truly faced a disaster, we’d have to frag simply to protect others.

OK, venting over and time to check out email and comments.

Reporting from one of the biggest “blow jobs” I’ve ever had, this is your Benevolent Dictator signing off.

Posted by Ranting Right Wing Howler     on 09/06/2004 at 07:48 AM   
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All Your Baseball Field Are Belong To Us

Marines in Iraq have decided the Middle East needs to understand that not all Americans are Yankees. In that spirit, they’ve built their own version of Boston’s Fenway Park, complete with Big Green Monster. No word yet on when Wrigley Field will be constructed. Shortage of ivy and red brick blamed for delay.

CAMP RAMADI, Iraq (Aug. 31, 2004)—Captain Stephen Pritchard has the ultimate offer to the Boston Red Sox CEO, John Henry, and Red Sox general manager Theo Epstein.

“If the Spring Training venue in Sarasota, Fla., ever proves to be untenable, then you are more than welcome to hold Spring Training here in Ar Ramadi, Iraq,” said Pritchard, a logistics officer with 3rd Battalion, 11th Marine Regiment.

Why such a gracious offer?

Cannoncockers of 3rd Battalion 11th Marine Regiment constructed a miniature version of the Red Sox’s Fenway Park at Camp Ramadi, Iraq.

“The Army here on base had their own baseball field, and we had to travel over there whenever we wanted to play,” said Pritchard, from Weymouth, Mass. “So we cleared up an area and built one ourselves.”

Pritchard provided the inspiration behind modeling the diamond after Boston’s famous baseball park.

“I am a big Red Sox fan, and Fenway has the most famous left field fence in the Major Leagues,” Pritchard said. “Not just that, but it is the most identifiable feature of any American sporting venue.”

The Marines used over 200 panels of recycled wood to construct the outer fence of the field that reaches 290 feet to center field. They used old light poles as foul line poles and over 120 gallons of green paint. The left field has an unmistakable feature like Fenway: the “Green Monster,” a 64-foot long and 18-foot high wall.

Posted by The Skipper     on 09/06/2004 at 05:49 AM   
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Daily Dose 06-Sep-2004

Labor Day

Quote Of The Day

“Man is so made that he can only find relaxation from one kind of labor by taking up another.”
-- Anatole France (1844 - 1924)

September 6, 1901 - President McKinley Is Shot
President William McKinley is shot at the Pan-American Exposition in Buffalo, New York. McKinley was greeting the crowd in the Temple of Music when Leon Czolgosz, an anarchist, stepped forward and shot the president twice at point-blank range. McKinley lived for another week before finally succumbing to a gangrene infection on September 14. At the time of the shooting, President McKinley was very popular and America was in the midst of a period of peace and prosperity. Czolgosz, a laborer from Cleveland who fell under the sway of charismatic leaders of anarchy such as Emma Goldman and Alexander Berkman, became particularly obsessed with Gaetano Bresci, an anarchist who shot and killed King Humbert I of Italy on July 29, 1900. Czolgosz decided to kill McKinley to further the anarchist cause. While Presidents Lincoln and Garfield had been completely unprotected at the time of their assassinations, the newly formed Secret Service was now available to protect President McKinley. But when Czolgosz stepped up to shake McKinley’s hand with a handkerchief covering the .32 revolver in his hand, the agents thought nothing of it. After the shots were fired, the agents grabbed Czolgosz and began pummeling him, but McKinley warned, “Be easy with him, boys,” as he was helped to an ambulance. The president then told his secretary to be careful in telling the First Lady what happened. Working in a building with no electricity, surgeons operated on the president, who seemed to be recovering at first. Legend has it that his recovery diet was raw eggs and whiskey. Before lapsing into a coma and dying, McKinley’s last words were: “It is God’s way. His will, not ours, be done.” McKinley’s assassination led to reprisals against his critics across the country. Those who had spoken poorly of the president were tarred and feathered. Emma Goldman was even arrested for allegedly inspiring the murder. But Czolgosz took full and sole responsibility for the assassination and was sent to the electric chair less than two months later. On October 29, his last words were: “I am not sorry for my crime.”

Marquis de Lafayette, (1757–1834), French general and political leader
Joseph Patrick Kennedy, (1888–1969), U.S. ambassador to Great Britain, father of John F. Kennedy
Claire Lee Chennault, (1890–1958), American general

_{Thanks to The Quotations Page - The History Channel - The Biography Channel.}

Posted by The Skipper     on 09/06/2004 at 05:28 AM   
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   Sunday - September 05, 2004

Hoist The Tops’l

This future Navy Chief knows that when a storm is bearing down and the ship is dead in the water, sometimes you just gotta improvise. It’s too bad the officers aren’t this smart ....

Note: This one’s for all the retired Navy Chiefs out there .. and all the Ensigns and Lt. JG’s who made their life miserable. Anchors Away!

Posted by The Skipper     on 09/05/2004 at 06:19 PM   
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Le Joke Du Jour

John Kerry and John Edwards arrive at a McDonalds during a campaign swing through the Midwest. In her excitement at seeing the two candidates, an employee accidentally spills coffee on Kerry’s hand.

Within minutes Edwards had filed a multi-million dollar lawsuit against McDonalds while .... you guessed it .... Kerry was busy writing the incident up for his fourth Purple Heart

Quote From John Kerry: “I’m not French, I just look like a surrender monkey”.

More Bad News For Kerry, Part I: The US Navy has now launched an official probe into Kerry’s falsified military records.

More Bad News For Kerry, Part II: In a unanimous decision, the Mad Mullahs of Iran have declared that John Kerry is their selection as next President of the US.

When it rains it pours, don’t it John?

Posted by The Skipper     on 09/05/2004 at 04:19 PM   
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Weekend Pinup Gal - 05-Sep-2004

This weekend’s featured pinup artist is a contemporary painter, Michael Calandra. You can visit the Calandra Studio on-line to view more works by this excellent artist. The one below is entitled “Samantha”. Gentlemen, start your engines ....

Posted by The Skipper     on 09/05/2004 at 10:01 AM   
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Update on Hurricane Frances from The “West Coast”

Well, here it is Sunday morning, 10:00, and Frances is beginning to deliver us a few back-handed slaps.  In a few hours we expect a full face-pummeling that should last for quite some time, into the night and possibly tomorrow morning.

Took a walk outside and all my plants are doing the “Frances Wave.” Lots of small debris everywhere.  Little rain----still.  Hmmmm, very unusual.

They expect the eye to make its exit wound around midnight (she’s a slow mover) and with tropical storm force winds possible up to 80 miles from her center, it would be well into tomorrow morning before things settle down.

For that reason I re-scheduled my flight to South Dakota for Wednesday.  So if you thought you would be rid of my ranting and raving about politics and Fuckface in particular---so sorry, charley (pun intended!)

Your only respite from my verbal salvoes would be a power outage which I fully expect within a few hours and which will possibly stay out for a couple of days. So......I am making lots of ice blocks and storing them in a large cooler for when I need to protect my perishables and those of my parents.

But if power stays on I am getting some stuff currently in draft mode ready to unleash tomorrow.

Well, time to go take a walk around the homestead and make sure all is well.

Update From Allan:

According to this map, the storm should be over Vilmar’s head tonight and will be knocking on my door Wednesday afternoon, Vilmar, is Mother nature trying to tell you and me something? Is this another Al Qaeda plot to take us out? Or has the Democratic Party finally figured out how to manipulate the weather? Our highly skilled BMEWS conspiracy theorists are working on this as we speak. Stay tuned ....

Posted by Ranting Right Wing Howler     on 09/05/2004 at 08:36 AM   
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News Bytes - 05-Sep-2004

Hurricane Frances slams into Florida at Cape Canaveral. Millions flee. Power out. Vilmar waits it out.

Bill Clinton awaits bypass surgery to remedy too many Big Macs problem. Asks hospital to keep Hillary away. Fears for his life if she gets near.

Teresa Heinz Kerry gets fed up with her husband’s bullshit and collpases, taken to hospital..

Osama bin Laden is dead meat. Soon to be taken into custody. How many times have we heard that story? Too many.

CBS has to pay half million dollar fine for Janet Jackson’s tit. Damn! That’s an expensive mammary gland, ain’t it?

The death toll at the school in Russia tops 350. Putin says “we must not be girly men”. Russian people angry at Putin. Putin angry at Islamic bastards. Islamic bastards angry at entire world. Entire world ready to nuke Islamic bastards.

President Bush opens up a double-digit lead in the polls over Senator John “Waffles” Kerry. Stock in Waffle House drops twenty points on NASDAQ.

From Iran: the Mad Mullahs are digging in their own deserts for uranium now. These ragheads won’t be happy until they can blow up the earth. Unfortunately for them, the Americans and Russians already have enough to blow up the earth about 70,000 times. KABOOM!

In further news, Miss Universe shows her ass. Literally. Nice cheeks, sweety!

And last, but not least, in opening week football Alabama tops Utah State 48-17. Roll Tide!

Posted by The Skipper     on 09/05/2004 at 12:49 AM   
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Daily Dose - 05-Sep-2004

Quote Of The Day

“Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. ”
-- Albert Einstein (1879 - 1955)

September 5, 1774 - First Continental Congress Convenes
In response to the British Parliament’s enactment of the Coercive Acts in the American colonies, the first session of the Continental Congress convenes at Carpenter’s Hall in Philadelphia. Fifty-six delegates from all the colonies except Georgia drafted a declaration of rights and grievances and elected Virginian Peyton Randolph as the first president of Congress. Patrick Henry, George Washington, John Adams, and John Jay were among the delegates.

September 5, 1972 - Arab Terrorists Take Israeli Hostages At The Olympics
In the early morning hours of September 5, six members of the Arab terrorist group known as Black September dressed in the Olympic sweat suits of Arab nations and jumped the fence surrounding the Olympic village in Munich, Germany, carrying bags filled with guns. Although guards spotted them, they paid little attention because athletes often jumped the fence during the competition to return to their living quarters. After changing into disguises, the terrorists, toting machine guns, burst into the apartments of 21 Israeli athletes and officials. Yossef Gutfreund, a wrestling referee who valiantly tried to keep the terrorists out, saved Tuvia Sokolovsky, who was able to climb out a window and escape. In another apartment, Moshe Weinberg was shot 12 times but still managed to wound one of the terrorists and save the life of one of his teammates. Created in 1970 by a few survivors of the “ten terrible September days” of fighting against Jordan for a Palestinian homeland, Black September succeeded in taking nine hostages before demanding the release of 236 prisoners-most of whom were Arab terrorists. The demands were categorically refused, but it was eventually agreed that the terrorists and the hostages would be taken to the Furstenfeldbruck airport by helicopter and given a plane. The German government planned an ambush at the airport, stationing sharpshooters around the runway and officers in the airplane. However, the plan quickly disintegrated when the officers in the plane, worried about their lack of preparation, deserted. There weren’t nearly enough sharpshooters to effectively take down all of the terrorists either, partly because the Germans didn’t realize that two other terrorists had joined the Black September attack. Still, the ambush was carried out. Three terrorists were taken out in the first wave of shots, but the others were able to hide out of range. One threw a grenade into a helicopter where five hostages were still tied up, instantly killing them all. Another terrorist fired his machine gun into another helicopter, killing the remaining hostages. Twenty hours after Black September had begun their attack, a German police official, 5 Palestinian terrorists, and 11 Israeli athletes lay dead. Three of the terrorists who survived were imprisoned but were set free a month later when Arabs hijacked a Lufthansa 727 and demanded their release. A few days after the tragic event at the Olympics, Israel retaliated with air strikes against Syria and Lebanon, killing 66 people and wounding dozens. In addition, Israel sent out assassination squads to hunt down members of Black September while Israeli troops broke through the Lebanese border, igniting the heaviest fighting since the Six-Day War of 1967.

Louis XIV, (1638–1715), King of France (1643–1715), son and successor of King Louis XIII
Jesse (Woodson) James, (1847–82), American outlaw
Darryl F. Zanuck, (1902-1979), American film producer
Bob Newhart, (1929- ), American TV actor

_{Thanks to The Quotations Page - The History Channel - The Biography Channel.}

Posted by The Skipper     on 09/05/2004 at 12:34 AM   
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   Saturday - September 04, 2004

Democratic Dirty Tricks

The Democrats are getting desperate. Now, they’re running an ad purporting to show Zell Miller is flip-flopping on George Bush. The only problem is they are trying to confuse voters with sound bites from Miller talking about ANOTHER George Bush, the former President, George H. W. Bush. As usual, lies and deception are the Dummycraps favorite tactic .....

Posted by The Skipper     on 09/04/2004 at 07:22 PM   
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And Now, For Something Completely Different

And Now, For Something Completely Different

Still waiting on Frances who is out screwing around near Palm Beach.  The sunset was pretty this evening.  The rain---nonexistant.  Hot as hell all day with few clouds.

So, I cleaned house (while I still had power) and then relaxed with a DVD.  The movie I watched was “The Wall” feautring Roger Waters (natch!) in Berlin 1990.  INCREDIBLE!!!!  AWESOME!!! Probably the best concert I’ve seen on DVD.  Star studded to the max--Joni Mitchell, Bryan Adams, Van Morrison, Sinead O’Connor, Paul Carrack, The Scorpions, Thomas Dolby, The Band, etc.

Considering when it took place (mere months after the Berlin Wall came down) it held special significance for me as an old fogey.

Which brings me to the subject at hand---concerts.

I’ve watched quite a few in my time:

This does not include all the classical concerts performed by local musicians not the concerts by lesser known bands or cover bands.

So here’s the question.............what’s the best concert you’ve ever seen....live?

And what’s the best concert you’ve ever seen .......broadcast?

Posted by Ranting Right Wing Howler     on 09/04/2004 at 07:18 PM   
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Not that very many people ever read this far down, but this blog was the creation of Allan Kelly and his friend Vilmar. Vilmar moved on to his own blog some time ago, and Allan ran this place alone until his sudden and unexpected death partway through 2006. We all miss him. A lot. Even though he is gone this site will always still be more than a little bit his. We who are left to carry on the BMEWS tradition owe him a great debt of gratitude, and we hope to be able to pay that back by following his last advice to us all:

1. Keep a firm grasp of Right and Wrong
2. Stay involved with government on every level and don't let those bastards get away with a thing
3. Use every legal means to defend yourself in the event of real internal trouble, and, most importantly:
4. Keep talking to each other, whether here or elsewhere

It's been a long strange trip without you Skipper, but thanks for pointing us in the right direction and giving us a swift kick in the behind to get us going. Keep lookin' down on us, will ya? Thanks.

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